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  1. #31
    Missouri Star

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    Default Re: Well he finally did it

    It can't hurt to talk to a lawyer...you don't necessarily need to take any action, just get some objective advice so you're fully informed about your choices.

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  3. #32
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    Default Re: Well he finally did it

    Quote Originally Posted by chelea View Post
    It can't hurt to talk to a lawyer...you don't necessarily need to take any action, just get some objective advice so you're fully informed about your choices.
    That's what I was thinking too. The thing about this, that's not really the house but we have have two acres in Hawaii that we pretty much got for a steal 30 yrs ago. You can google that what that's worth. I don't want to make any mistakes. Our relationship came down to money, but it really started with when my mom passed and then my dad and uncle and finally my aunt. He wanted me to pay for everything. I guess I was becoming a doormat. I stopped giving him sex, doing his laundry etc. I think the laundry really pissed him off. lol So the mat got trashed and the tent came up. So much for communication.

    I'm glad I don't have to pay for everyone's advice, I would be broke. lol



    Lorie

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  5. #33
    Missouri Star

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    Default Re: Well he finally did it

    Wow-just wow! Good luck with whatever you end up doing.

  6. #34
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    Default Re: Well he finally did it

    "Our relationship came down to money, but it really started with when my mom passed and then my dad and uncle and finally my aunt. He wanted me to pay for everything. I guess I was becoming a doormat. I stopped giving him sex, doing his laundry etc. "


    Lori,

    I hear you on this. Pretty much where I was at and it went down hill from there. I guess we all get to a certain point where we say enough is enough, and that varies by individual. Unfortunatly I have a very high pain tolerance.

    My wakeup point was where one day I was walking down one of the forest pathways and suddenly I saw myself in my mind laying on the ground having a heart attack, he was standing there watching me and just waiting for me to die, doing nothing, just watching for the last breath. The waking dream made very clear what the future had in store for me and I immediately knew that no, I wasn't willing to die for him and his antics.

    I went to a lawyer within that week for a consultation. It costs nothing for a consultation and you learn a lot. I wrote down joint property, etc and things I thought pertinent before I went to him. It gave me the opportunity to see if I felt this guy could handle things the way I wanted. You can do this with more than one attorney. I lucked out with this one and didn't have to look further. I let him know that my finances were very limited, I wanted as little hassle as possible and I wanted results quickly. In the end I was happy with my lawyer, no complaints about the cost. I was able to keep away from the emotional hassle and he made sure he was front and center, and able to limit the amount of manipulations my ex resorted to.

    I really wish you all the luck in heaven and earth with this and you're in my prayers.

    Women are Angels.
    When someone
    break's our wings
    we will continue to
    fly...usually on a
    broomstick.
    We're flexible like that.
    - embroitique

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  8. #35
    Missouri Star

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    Default Re: Well he finally did it

    Sending prayers to help you deal with this...it sounds like you are a strong lady...you have been putting up with so much....
    Carol

    Sewing Mends The Soul ~ Author Unknown

  9. #36
    The Guild President

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    Default Re: Well he finally did it

    Quote Originally Posted by sewbizzy View Post
    Sending prayers to help you deal with this...it sounds like you are a strong lady...you have been putting up with so much....
    The problem is that "putting up with it" is so much easier than actually DOING something about it. Been there. Done that. Got the farm.

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  11. #37
    Missouri Star

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    Default Re: Well he finally did it

    Quote Originally Posted by auntstuff View Post
    The problem is that "putting up with it" is so much easier than actually DOING something about it. Been there. Done that. Got the farm.
    Everybody's story is different. I'm sorry you had such a hard one and got through it.



    Lorie

  12. #38
    Missouri Star

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    Default Re: Well he finally did it

    It's easy for us to suggest what you should do but we all realize that you have to live with yourself. Those of us who have gone through it know how hard it is to take that first step, but I think we would all agree in the long run it was the right thing to do. Hope you find a solution you can live with.
    PLEASE take this as the joke it is....A little rat poison solves all sorts of troubles with little vermin
    ATTITUDE IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN AN ORDEAL AND AN ADVENTURE

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  14. #39
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    Default Re: Well he finally did it

    Thinking of you, Lorie.
    "I'm putting together a list of 100 reasons why I am NOT relentless!" - Sue Heck, The Middle

    Leonard: For God's sake, Sheldon, do I have to hold up a sarcasm sign every time I open my mouth?
    Sheldon (intrigued): You have a sarcasm sign?

  15. #40
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    Default Re: Well he finally did it

    Quote Originally Posted by pcbatiks View Post
    Thinking of you, Lorie.
    Thanks I was thinking of you yesterday. I found the book you sent me and said oh that's where it went. lol The forgotten things you find when your cleaning up! Iv'e collected more batiks since then so I'm happy it showed up!



    Lorie

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