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I think I have to change my will

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    I think I have to change my will

    I don't usually come talk about stuff. but since I told you guys about the War of the Roses situation, Dh has liver cancer and it looks like about a few months. I'm very sad about that. But my kids are already talking to me about the house. He's not even gone yet.

    He wan'ts to leave his half to the four kids (two step). I told the two that came (sd and first dd) I want to sell the house and move on. I think they want to fight it. Seeing a lawyer to fight my kids seems surreal right now. I might give my half to the WWF---World Wildlife Fund. Would it be bad to laugh right now? lol
    Lorie

    #2
    Re: I think I have to change my will

    Give it to the local rose society! Since you are still married I don't think he can leave it to the kids. If it's in both your names, wouldn't it go to you? Time to talk to that lawyer again. If he doesn't have a will maybe he would quit claim his half to you in return for you letting him live in the house.
    sigpic

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      #3
      Re: I think I have to change my will

      Oh my, Lorie. You have my sympathy. It seems like you just can't get a break. I'm sure there are some joint ownerships of homes that turn out well, but so many that don't. I pray that you can find peace when this is all over.

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        #4
        Re: I think I have to change my will

        So sorry to hear Lorie. Does he have that in writing? I have no advice except to maybe speak with a lawyer soon.
        Blessed are the children of the piecemakers for they shall inherit the quilts!

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          #5
          Re: I think I have to change my will

          Lorie...Sorry to hear about your DH's health. You really need to talk to your attorney about this asap. Are there community property laws in Hawaii? You need to find out right away what your options are. How disrespectful of your kids to be stressing you with this at this time. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
          sigpicwww.whisperofrose.blogspot.com


          Scottie Mom Barb

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            #6
            Re: I think I have to change my will

            You owing half and the other 2 owing 1/4 will be a total nightmare. Think of the expenses of the house, taxes, electric, etc. collecting 1/4 from each. If the house is in both your names, I don't want to sound crude but I would ride it out. There is so many different variables in your situation that we do not know that you should seek legal advise. My dad gave my brother and I his house in a Life Estate. It was a nightmare. My dad then wanted it back and I deeded my half back to him. My brother refused. When my dad died his estate got divided between 6 grandchildren including my half of the house. Now that's a whole another story dividing 1/6 up on a house worth nothing. Seek out counsel and do what is best for you. My prayers are with you as you move forward.














            6 grandchildren and had

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              #7
              Re: I think I have to change my will

              Isn't it amazing that when these sad situations happens, the only thing (it appears here) is that people are concerned about "what will I get out of it". Sorry to be so direct. They should be providing support and love, not greed and insensitivity.

              I've seen this before in many families and it boils down to very sad. Why is it that these folks "feel they are due something"?

              I will echo what folks have said here. Get a lawyer now and know what you are obligated to do and what you aren't. In most states, as a spouse you are entitled to 50% of the estate even if you are not on the deed of any property. Estate means everything....bank accounts, investments, etc.

              My heart breaks for you and this challenge. First, you are losing your partner, and then there are challenges with family members who may be very important to you. Stay strong and know where you stand legally.
              “Of all the paths you take in life, make sure a few of them are dirt.” ― John Muir
              “We can be many things in this life, choose to be kind!” ― author unknown

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                #8
                Re: I think I have to change my will

                I swear death brings out the worst in families. I seen the nicest people (or so I thought) become lunitics. Money seems to change lots of folks. Protect yourself.....see a lawyer......asap!
                💫 Star lover

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                  #9
                  Re: I think I have to change my will

                  Definitely see a lawyer. I was reading on another forum about this. In some states the step children were entitled to half of the estate. Best of luck in this battle

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                    #10
                    Re: I think I have to change my will

                    I think sharing the house just would not work long term. There would be way too much arguing about who owes for what expenses, etc. I would try to find out if your husband actually signed a will then get a copy and take it to your lawyer. It might be that he says he wants to leave his house jointly to all of you but he might not have that down on paper. I think it has to be in writing. Good luck. I was just thinking of your situation the other day and wondering how things are going.

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                      #11
                      Re: I think I have to change my will

                      Lorie, I don't have anything to add that hasn't already been said. It does seem like death brings out the worst. I know in my situation, I'm really proud of how my kids have come to my support.

                      Lifting your family in my prayers for wisdom and compassion.
                      Katrina


                      “Nothing can dim the light which shines from within.”
                      ― Maya Angelou

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                        #12
                        Re: I think I have to change my will

                        just do the Quit Claim correctly. my husband refused to have a Will. he did take me to the City and filed a quit claim. After he passed they called me and said he hadn't specified that I was to be a joint owner so they considered me a joint tenant only. I had to get a lawyer and have the step kids sign papers and file all those. Finally got it done. sold the next year and moved back to Texas. What a mess. good luck. do what ever you want!!

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                          #13
                          Re: I think I have to change my will

                          Ditto on the lawyer. I think just for your own protection getting legal advise will help you decide what you want to do versus what you CAN do. Lorie, I am so sorry you're having to deal with all this on top of everything else. You know we're here for you to vent when you need.

                          Take care.
                          Gina

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                            #14
                            Re: I think I have to change my will

                            Good luck Lorie. I'm sorry, it sounds like a really tough road ahead.

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                              #15
                              Re: I think I have to change my will

                              Thanks everyone. There are four kids, two step that I knew from 4 and five (boy and girl) and my two girls. My stepson is actually not his. He got together with his girlfriend while she was pregnant with him and got married when she was pregnant with my step dd. We get along together great which is funny. People look at us in disbelief sitting together drinking a beer. I'd rather live with her than any of these kids right now.
                              Lorie

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