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    Funny/Strange/Weird Christmas Stories

    Had to go for a haircut today and was telling my hairdresser about my frustrating family Christmas. She told me the funniest Christmas story I've ever heard. So now that the holidays are over I thought I'd ask if anyone would like to share their funny/strange/weird story.

    My hairdresser & her hubby didn't live near her in-laws so she didn't know them very well. On their first Christmas together they were invited to her in-laws on Christmas Day to arrive at noon. She told me that they arrived, the family opened presents & then started to visit. She was hungry since it was lunch time but noticed no food smells & no one mentioned lunch, offered a cup of coffee or even a cracker. She caught her hubby in the hallway & asked about lunch. He said, "oh my mom doesn't cook & Christmas day is her day off so she does nothing today." She told her hubby she was getting a headache & they needed to leave soon before she fainted from hunger.

    I don't think I've laughed so hard in my life!
    :icon_happy:


    sigpic

    #2
    Re: Funny/Strange/Weird Christmas Stories

    Oh my, I had to laugh out loud on this one. I think my SIL does the same. My sister told me she went there for Christmas, and all they had was cookies and coffee. They usually have pizza, but didn'the even do that this year. My brother cooks most of the time anyw a y.

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      #3
      Re: Funny/Strange/Weird Christmas Stories

      I'll put that in the weird category, for the husband not warning her so she could eat before they went.
      🌺 Lorie

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        #4
        Re: Funny/Strange/Weird Christmas Stories

        One things for sure and for certain, the only thing I'll cook on Christmas day is Sausage Bread. The rest of the day, eat the left overs from Christmas Eve Dinner.

        I remember on Christmas when I was little, Santa didn't come to my house. It was on a Sunday. We went to church as usual, and then went to Grandma and Grandpa Phillips's house. Santa went to their house for me. It was the only year I had a stocking, it was bigger than I was and filled to the brim with stuff I know my mom wouldn't approve of
        .
        Katrina
        “Nothing can dim the light which shines from within.” Maya Angelou

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          #5
          Re: Funny/Strange/Weird Christmas Stories

          Funny story. I'm wondering if your MIL started it years ago and is still waiting for someone to figure out she doesn't have to be the only cook in the house. Kind of one of those light bulb moments for the family.

          We had 5 girls in our family growing up so naturally when holidays came we got dish washing duty. On Christmas I never had to do the holiday dishes because it was also my birthday. :-) I liked that.
          https://forum.missouriquiltco.com/co.../icon_wave.gif
          Women are Angels. When someone break's our wings we will continue to fly-usually on a broomstick.We're flexible like that.

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            #6
            Re: Funny/Strange/Weird Christmas Stories

            My girl friend had a nice story last Christmas.....She usually hosts at her place for her family and hubby's, really goes all out-prime rib, crab legs, twice baked potatoes goes the whole nine yards. Last year her SIL begged to have it to show off their new home. They took the 3.5 hr drive to be there on time for the 20 dinner. 6 couples showed up for the meal which included a pound box of spaghetti with a can of sauce and that was literally it. My friend hosted again this year.


            Beth
            Happiness is a FULL bobbin!

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              #7
              Re: Funny/Strange/Weird Christmas Stories

              Christmas is my favorite holiday. When my children were little, we never bought them gifts: We had no money, and they got so many from their grandparents and aunts/uncles that they never noticed. We go to DH's extended family party around dinnertime. Everyone brings "pick-up" food. There are no gifts, but we ALL (four generations) sing Christmas songs - both religious and secular - for a couple of hours. It's really a wonderful time.

              The rule on Christmas morning was that no presents could be opened until all bedrooms were clean and breakfast dishes taken care of. Probably the one day of the year that my house was in order before noon, LOL!

              One of my favorite Christmas memories happened when my mother sent each of my ten children $25 for Christmas. I took them all to the dollar store, divvied them up into pairs (oldest-youngest, 2nd-9th, etc.), so the older ones helped the younger, and told them to get each of their siblings a gift. I walked around the store to give help as needed. The cashier was pretty tickled, seeing them come through the checkout with ten items each (nine siblings plus something for their dad & me). On Christmas Day, not one person got two of the same gift, which was something of a Christmas Miracle, I guess! The little ones were especially proud of being able to give gifts to their siblings, dad, and me.

              As for cooking on Christmas, I've never had to do it. We have a big dinner with DH's immediate family on Christmas Eve, so we just eat sandwiches for lunch on Christmas Day, & then go to the aforementioned "big party" around dinnertime. About ten years ago, my sister and her DH & DD came to visit us at Christmas, so I made a bacon-and-egg casserole in the morning and that became a bit of a tradition. Now that my children are grown, they make the casserole!

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                #8
                Re: Funny/Strange/Weird Christmas Stories

                I have wonderful memories of Christmas when I was growing up. My mom would invite older people who had no family or a place to go for dinner. So there are lots of pictures with neighbours and these became extended family. My mom loved to host, and she would set a beautiful table with all the crystal glasses and silverware. Some years we would go to my godparents, as they lived in our town. Again, lots of food and everyone helped. For my family, New Years is the big tradition where we would gather at one of many uncle's farm with many of the cousins. We would play upstairs, games and all, and we were allowed a glass of soft drink, a treat. The aunts and uncles would sing French Canadian 'chansons a repondre' (sing-a-long) until the wee hours. The kids would fall asleep among the coats tossed on the beds. This is where I learned to love quilts. There would be a huge buffet spread, provided by all. The women would then clean up and do dishes, as most of the men had to get up early to milk the cows and tend to chores. I think we had gifts but not a lot like what kids get now.
                When I was with 1st husband, I started hosting xmas dinner for his and my family. About 30 people. I would set the table with finest, like I was raised to do. My brother and his family would arrive, nothing in hand, sometimes no even a bottle of wine or buns. Then not help to serve or clean up. Kids would leave mess and then his family would stay over and want to go to casino all night. I stayed with someone to clean up and be there for kids. After doing this for Easter and all holidays, I said I would not host. So never been to my brother for a meal in 43 years, except once and they brought us to restaurant and we paid our bill. Dinner at ex would be Turkey and stuffing out of box and not enough to feed a crowd. The kids were hungry and cranky. Oh, and money is not an issue, so no excuse. After 30 years, I am no longer part of this family circus.
                Now with DH, we have hosted our kids and now that they are married, spouses and GKs. They bring something, but I am ususally cooking and preparing for weeks. I am usually exhausted. This year, everything was as usual, ham, tourtière, salads, sweet and regular patatoes, but the Turkey was Butterball from a box. It was ok, and I had warned the kids. They didn't complain as they know I would relinquish this to first one who complains. I bought thake away containers, as they all go home with leftovers. DH always makes sure that at least half his ham stays with us. I don't mind. Husband jokes about greeting them next year with a boxed meal at the door, and wish them merry Xmas. He is too funny.

                Enjoy life and do what makes you happy. Everything else will follow.

                Every day I try to do one thing that challenges my comfort zone.

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                  #9
                  Re: Funny/Strange/Weird Christmas Stories

                  Your story reminds me of times past that I had forgotten. I was disliked by my inlaws from the time I got married to the bitter end. The holidays were always a hazzle of fighting. We both came from large families. I thought it was fair early on to alternate the years we went to my families for Christmas and the next years his. We'd tend to go the the alternate family on Christmas eve. So I thought we covered all bases in a fair way. Not so. Turned out we still HAD to stop at his mothers and also his brother's house before the time of dinner at my families (usually my mother's house). Naturally it worked out that we were always late to my mother's dinner and of course nasty comments and arguments always occurred. On years that it was at his mothers it never worked the other way, we couldn't go to my mothers because we might be late for his mothers and/or brother's. I mean....after all....we had agreed to a system. (hummm apparently only every other year). I really began to cringe when it came to holidays and families.

                  Finally I thought I found a solution. Nothing ever happened on New Year's Day...for 10 years ....nothing. So I decided that I would host an open house for New Years Day. Both families...whoever came, came, whoever didn't..no hard feelings. I did this because I was tired of traveling all over the place, packing up kids, the fights and the verbal targets. That lasted for two years and then I got a call from my SIL that "every year I hold the New Years Day party" and this year they were going to hold it at their house. Yes and of course plus all the running around and fighting for Christmas Day and Christmas eve. You just can't win!

                  It wasn't just holidays (does that surprise you?). For two years we lived right on the ocean in an apartment. That was early on before we purchased a house. His brother with his 4 kids showed up one weekend, went to the beach. Towels on the bathroom floor, sand in the living room etc. He then just before leaving stated "I hope you don't mind us coming here to the beach this summer and using you place." He had just purchased a nice home with a fireplace that year. So I said "Not if you don't mind us coming and using your fireplace this winter. " He got furious and highly insulted for that suggestion. Yes....I was a b#tch and way way out of line. LOL, but I felt better "drawing a line".

                  For me ex's make life so much less cluttered and it's probably why I now really enjoy quiet carefree Holidays :-)
                  https://forum.missouriquiltco.com/co.../icon_wave.gif
                  Women are Angels. When someone break's our wings we will continue to fly-usually on a broomstick.We're flexible like that.

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                    #10
                    Re: Funny/Strange/Weird Christmas Stories

                    Oh you girls are too funny. This year,, baby DD hosted the family Christmas party. SHe was so excited as it was her first year to do it. She was amazed that the food set her back $300. (she's doing alright financially right now and the reason we never had her host was partly the cost). Then , she planned and planned and I must say, she threw a spectacularly fun party with games and prizes and fun and laughter and beautiful food.
                    Anyway, after the party she and I were on the phone and I apologized that I hadn't stayed for the cleanup (we had a 4 hour drive, everyone else 2) She said, "Oh, that's okay, Kevin helped...but boy was the house dirty. I asked Kevin if he thought Mom's house was this dirty after everyone left...and he said, well, sure it is...30 people in and out, its gotta happen"
                    So, now everyone understands that hosting is a lot of work, but it can be very rewarding.
                    Walk in peace with the Lord by your side.
                    Terry

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                      #11
                      Re: Funny/Strange/Weird Christmas Stories

                      I just love all these stories! I can sure identify with the family bickering, etc. Don't we all have that in our families somewhere. When or children were preschool age, 25 years ago, we lived in Tennessee but or immediate families lived in Wisconsin so every year we would pack up the car with the kids and the presents and drive up north for the holidays. It was so exhausting! My parents and dh parents really never got together at the same time plus dh's parents were divorced, so we had to see his mom and his dad separately. I remember many years of tug of war, both our Moms would plan a big dinner of course for the same night. My Mom especially always made me feel guilty she thought I was spending more time with dh's family than ours. We tried to make things even by spending equal time with each side of the family but it was so hard and nobody was happy! Some times we didn't even try, dh would go to his family with one of the kids and I would go to mine. We even resorted to lying a couple of times about the day we were arriving so we could sneak in a visit to some friends because it was impossible to get away from family for that once our official "visit" began. Eventually we moved back up north and that made it lits easier, but those were a couple of rough years. Now our youngest dd lives out of town 2 hrs away. I don't want her to have to repeat our struggles so I try to be very laid back when she comes to visit and not put any guilt trips on her. And I encourage her to see her old friends.

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                        #12
                        Re: Funny/Strange/Weird Christmas Stories

                        Love the stories too. Some sweet, some not so much. I'm torn which type of story to tell, but decided on a sweet one...
                        When I was a young lass, my family always had a very tall Christmas tree (10+ footer). Mom was a firm believer in decorating the entire tree with ornaments, including inside the tree and the back side as well, so we had TONS of ornaments. and even several tree toppers that she would switch out during the month of December, which was no small feat considering the size of the tree and that it was already decorated!
                        The year that I entered third grade, my family moved onto a houseboat (80 foot long with 3 levels, 5 staterooms (bedrooms) and 3 lounges (living, dining, family room), plus the Pilot House, galley (kitchen), and one head (bathroom)) , so while it had lots of floor space, it didn't have much height on each level, the ceilings were so low that Dad could change lightbulbs without so much as a step ladder, and he was only 5'11'.
                        Our first Christmas, Dad went out and bought the tree and when he dragged in on-board Mom took one look and said “It’s too tall, you’ll need to take off at least 3 feet”, Dad says “Well, maybe only 2!”. So back out on the dock he drags the tree and trims off two feet and some of the lower branches, drags it back it, stands it up, and proudly says “See told you only needed two feet off”.
                        Mom: “Uhm, honey, the tree isn’t in the stand yet, you need to take off another foot”. Dad: “Well, maybe another 6 inches”, so back out the tree goes for another trimming, put in the stand, back on the houseboat, stood up. Mom: “Told you it needed another foot!”. Dad: “ What do you mean? It fits!”. Mom: “Yes but the top of the tree is touching the ceiling”. Dad: “So?”. Mom: “No room for the Star”. Dad: “(big sigh of resignation) Ok, be right back…” out goes the tree, trimmed yet again, and back on the boat.
                        Now the real battle begins, no way will all of Mom’s ornaments fit on this little tree, and the kids are bickering as to which ornaments should grace the tree, and of course Mom and Dad have opinions too. But it was Dad who came up with the solution. He took Mom aside to share his plan. Then told all of us to load up in the truck we had an errand to run. That errand was back to the tree lot, where Dad purchased 3 more trees, smaller than the first one (Dad did learn his lesson lol).
                        That year, and for the next two years while we lived on the houseboat, we had 4 Christmas Trees, one in the Living Lounge, one in the Dining Lounge, one in the Family Lounge, and one in the Pilot House, and there was always room for all of Mom’s ornaments.

                        Welcome aboard the "Big Dipper"
                        Big Dipper 2.jpg

                        Big Dipper.jpg
                        (that's me on the left in the door way)

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                          #13
                          Re: Funny/Strange/Weird Christmas Stories

                          LOL oh I can see that Caroline!So sweet that your Dad bought more trees too LOL Did you make wreaths from the cutoff bottom of the big tree? Up until this year I use to always buy bigger trees than I needed and did that. Use to make those huge wreaths that would have cost a fortune. It use to make three, one for me and two to give away to my neighbors. Also, this year I succumbed to a fake tree because of my age.
                          https://forum.missouriquiltco.com/co.../icon_wave.gif
                          Women are Angels. When someone break's our wings we will continue to fly-usually on a broomstick.We're flexible like that.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Re: Funny/Strange/Weird Christmas Stories

                            Loving the stories. What I do remember are bits and pieces of different Christmas's past. One year like one of Sally's children I begged my mother for some money to buy our 4 cousins Christmas gifts. Their mother (Aunt Mary) was my godmother and she always had a nice gift for me and a small one for my brother and sister so I wanted to get a small gift for each of our cousins. How I labored in the 5 & 10 for over an hour choosing their gifts.

                            Early in 1940's we were living in a newly built house with a fireplace. My father choose a tree too tall for the living room so he cut the top off and they squished the topper on as best they could. I was so excited about having a fireplace just like the Christmas stories I had read that I got one of my brother's socks and one of mine and anchored them on the mantle with some knickknacks. One night it was snowing lightly when I went to bed. I woke up during early morning hearing the sound of hooves and jingle bells that I knew that it had to be Santa and his sled. Looked out the window and saw sled tracks in the snow. Boy was I excited so iI ran downstairs and was surprised there were no gifts under our tree. In the morning when I told my mother about this she told me Christmas was a week away and what I heard and saw was the milkman making his deliveries.
                            Last edited by MissMay; January 4, 2018, 03:45 PM.
                            MissMay AKA May in Jersey

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                              #15
                              Re: Funny/Strange/Weird Christmas Stories

                              Originally posted by Carlie Wolf View Post
                              Funny story. I'm wondering if your MIL started it years ago and is still waiting for someone to figure out she doesn't have to be the only cook in the house. Kind of one of those light bulb moments for the family.

                              We had 5 girls in our family growing up so naturally when holidays came we got dish washing duty. On Christmas I never had to do the holiday dishes because it was also my birthday. :-) I liked that.
                              I'm one of 5 girls too Carrie - where are you - I'm the middle sister

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