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    Almost Adopted

    Last April my daughter and her husband were given a little boy through the foster care system. He had been abandoned by his mother and his father was in prison. No relative on either side wanted to take him.

    We had to wait one year (rules of the state) before he was able to be adopted. Relatives on both sides supported our family in the adoption, knowing that B and J practice open adoption and they could forever be in his life.

    Eleven months later, after we have grown to love him fiercely as our own. a grandmother has changed her mind and is now going to adopt him. He is in the process of being transitioned over one month's time from our home to hers. This is his first long weekend away from us and his grandmother, in a phone call, said he is crying for us all day long. We are putting on a cheerful face for him, telling him that he gets to go and live with Grammie Sue and how much she loves him. But there is no way we can make this easy for him. At bedtime he says to Bethany, "Mommy, protect me." He is only two years old.

    My daughter suffers from infertility and will never have natural born children. She wants a houseful and has loved over 20 foster children over the past few years. She and this child have been inseparable for one year. How does she say goodbye? How do we all say goodbye?

    Please pray for us, and for little C. Bethany is the only mother he has ever known, and being raised by his grandmother it is likely she is the only mother he will ever know. He is young and will forget us in time. We will never forget him. Please pray that I can comfort my daughter as I am also feeling such grief. Pray for her two sons, ages 6 and 7, who love him as a brother and do not want him to leave.

    We have been blindsided by this and do not know how to cope. Lord, have mercy on us all. That is my prayer.
    Cyndi


    “Have courage for the great sorrows of life and patience for the small ones; and when you have laboriously accomplished your daily task, go to sleep in peace. God is awake.” - Victor Hugo

    #2
    Re: Almost Adopted

    His grandmother is a lovely woman who we know will love him and take good care of him. We wish she had decided to do this sooner, much sooner, but she is doing it out of love for C. She knows it is hard for us to say goodbye to him and promises to send us pictures and notes to let us know how he is doing. Bethany was just so close to having him as her forever son.
    Cyndi


    “Have courage for the great sorrows of life and patience for the small ones; and when you have laboriously accomplished your daily task, go to sleep in peace. God is awake.” - Victor Hugo

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      #3
      Re: Almost Adopted

      Praying, praying, praying. Curious - has this grandmother been part of his life at all up until this time? How old is she? Does she have the financial means to raise a child? How is her health? Are there any back-up relatives? I can't imagine, at my age, having total care of a toddler . . . So sad, so sad.
      Sometimes, when there's a raging fire,
      it's best not to try to put it out with gasoline.

      "...pal carajo con la negatividad..."

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        #4
        Re: Almost Adopted

        Originally posted by Sandy Navas View Post
        Praying, praying, praying. Curious - has this grandmother been part of his life at all up until this time? How old is she? Does she have the financial means to raise a child? How is her health? Are there any back-up relatives? I can't imagine, at my age, having total care of a toddler . . . So sad, so sad.
        Sue has been seeing him about once a month since he came into our home. She had never met him before that. She is in her 50's and has a husband in ill health. There are no back up relatives to take him if she cannot continue to care for him, so the only option would be for him to return to foster care. I know I could not take on the responsibility of a child so young, and I adore little children! And this is one active toddler! He exhausts me after an hour or so. Raising children is for the young, those with energy for the long haul.

        I am trying to sew everyday to keep my hands occupied. But when the tears come as they have been so often, it is impossible to do anything else but cry. We are trying not to cry in front of him, but when he hugs me around the neck I think of how much I will miss this and I have to turn my face away to keep him from seeing the tears. But he knows.

        Sorry this is all so long. It's hard for me to talk about it but it does need to come out. Thanks for listening to me. We are truly heartbroken over here.
        Last edited by cyndiofthevortex; March 28, 2014, 07:13 PM.
        Cyndi


        “Have courage for the great sorrows of life and patience for the small ones; and when you have laboriously accomplished your daily task, go to sleep in peace. God is awake.” - Victor Hugo

        Comment


          #5
          Re: Almost Adopted

          It seems a sad situation all the way around right now. I pray that eventually everyone can transition to where they need to be in this child's life. Praying for you all.
          Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it.
          Maya Angelou

          ~Megan~

          Comment


            #6
            Re: Almost Adopted

            Praying for all of you and especially C. I can not imagine the pain that you are all feeling.
            Lisa

            M*QC forum is full of the best people!

            I'm not just buying fabric, I am supporting the economy...

            A bad day in the sewing room is better than a good day at the office.

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              #7
              Re: Almost Adopted

              My heart is breaking for your family.
              Vonnie

              Comment


                #8
                Re: Almost Adopted

                Sending my thoughts and prayers your way. How sad to be going through this.

                Comment


                  #9
                  Re: Almost Adopted

                  So very sad for your family. I can't even begin to imagine it. ((((HUGS)))))

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Re: Almost Adopted

                    I keep thinking in the back of my mind "maybe she will change her mind." It's getting a little too late for that to happen. I hope for his sake whatever happens he ends up in a happy, loving home.

                    Hugs and good wishes to all of you and your family, Cyndi. I know this isn't easy.
                    K is for Karen 😊​..................
                    Cremation - My last hope for a smokin' hot body.


                    Before you speak,
                    T - is it TRUE?
                    H - is it HELPFUL?
                    I - is it INSPIRING?
                    N - is it NECESSARY?
                    K - is it KIND?

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                      #11
                      Re: Almost Adopted

                      So sorry this has taken such an unexpected turn, best wishes for the little ones and your daughter and son-in-law, this must be so difficult for all of you.
                      Quilts may come, and quilts may go, but the stitches stay the same.:icon_hi:

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Re: Almost Adopted

                        ((((((((((Cyndi and Bethany)))))))))))))) my heart break s for you and l know exactly how your daughter must be feeling ..it would totally destroy me if it happened as l have infertility as well and did IVF for 20 yrs without success ....we never went into adoption or foster care..

                        A few yrs ago l was working in the crèche for AMF Bowling Alley and we had a little boy come in every week with his foster mother he was such a cutie and we got really attached to each other..one morning we got all the kids seated waiting for morning tea and l noticed jax was really quiet and looked sad he had his head hanging down ..l went over to him sat on the floor next to him and whispered in his ear "whats wrong Jackie boy are you missing mum" he looked at me from under his eye lids and nodded "yes" ...l said " l'm sorry your missing mummy jax ...can l have a hug" he threw his arms around my neck and gave me the biggest hug...l struggled to hold back the tears he was about 3 yrs old ...and it broke my heart when he eventually went back to his mum because he was the first child l could have easily gone into adoption for .........its so hard and completely heart breaking........l'm really sorry Cyndi l hope everything works out for you all l'll be thinking of you and hoping with all my heart that it all works out in the end.. chin up mate
                        Last edited by Lissau; March 28, 2014, 09:55 PM.

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                          #13
                          Re: Almost Adopted

                          Praying for this boy and your family during this heartbreaking time.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Re: Almost Adopted

                            has he had a lawyer appointed to him to watch out for his best interest? in Ma. it's a guardian at litem (sp)
                            i hope the best interest of this boy is being watched it should be the main focus but sadly the courts still look at children as property.
                            :icon_wave:Joan

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                              #15
                              Re: Almost Adopted

                              Sigh, Just wish I had some words to help you and your family through this awful ordeal. I'll keep you in my prayers. May

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