How do you get out of the dumps ?

[BobW]

I'm not adjusting well to my move and the new situation. I don't know if it is the additional health issues I'm having or what but I'm just in a funk. I don't want to do anything or even visit with friends. I'm so tired of this. I know I have so much to be thankful for, but I just can't focus on that part of my life right now.

Do any of you great people have ways to yank yourself out of the pits that usually works? Please share your ways if you are comfortable sharing.

[Jean Sewing Machine]

Re: How do you get out of the dumps ?

Well, Bob, dealing with all you've had to deal with in such a short amount of time is really hard! I really hope that you are feeling better physically. Then there is the change of living arrangements adding to the burden. I don't have any concrete advice for you except take baby steps toward how you want your life to progress in the future. You are probably still trying to recoup your strength from your wild and crazy trip, your illness and moving. So taking on big tasks or progress probably isn't in the cards for right now. Think of one small thing you can accomplish each day, and try to motivate to complete it. Pretty soon, those completed tasks will mount up and you'll be able to tackle bigger things. And know that your forum friends are here for you and praying to get our jolly BB back on track!

[K. McEuen]

Re: How do you get out of the dumps ?

You were pretty sick. First give yourself time to heal completely. Once you start feeling 100% again I bet your mood improves.

[Hulamoon]

Re: How do you get out of the dumps ?

Jean said it so well, so I don't know what to add. This might sound silly, but I love plants. I have a deck and I grow succulents, flowers, little pots I find at the market. I propagate from cuttings and watch it grow into a new beauty.

A little story. About five years ago my dd and I went to a farmers market and found this beautiful begonia
Pink Begonia Flower, Begonia

It fell in the car and broke. I took care of it and now I have four and they are all flowering. It makes me happy.

[LauraP]

Re: How do you get out of the dumps ?

depression is nothing to fool around with even if it's short term. Have you checked with your doc to see if any of your medicines could be causing this? If he says no discuss other short term and long term options.
Sometimes, just going out in the woods and screaming helps me. I don't have to explain to anyone what's wrong (I don't always know) but it gets whatever it is out of my system. If that doesn't work I take an extra anti-depressant. Without them I am suicidal so I don't mess around.

[stationarymom]

Re: How do you get out of the dumps ?

Bob I'm sorry to hear that you are still not feeling well.I don't have any real great advice either but,I know what it feels like to not care. Living with epilepsy and not being able to work or drive I've been there too.I needed to go see the Dr.and was put on a script it does help some.I think Jean had good advice to focus on one task a day at first and try to accomplish that and build from there.Have you considered doing something for someone else in need if your able? Sometimes that helps me at least at the moment to feel better.I hope you are feeling better soon.

[jjkaiser]

Re: How do you get out of the dumps ?

Oh Bob I am sorry you are having such a hard time right now. Maybe just too many new changes at once is just getting to you. I don't know the circumstances that caused you to move, but you must have at some point been a little excited about it. Starting over, a new beginning!! Try to recall what made you look forward to your new place, even if it is something small like a better view out the window or a neighborhood that has beautiful old trees or houses with interesting architecture. Walk around and take it all in. This is your new normal now so you have to focus on what's good and let go of the old. Listening to music can be really helpful. Motown will get you going and if you have a lot of anxiety, classical like Haydn or Mozart can be wonderful relaxing. Compartmentalize your doldrums and give yourself am hour a day to feel sorry for yourself. Then tell yourself okay time's up until my one hour tomorrow. You might have to talk yourself into it gradually, it might not work right away but it's worth a shot. That's what works for me when I am in a really crabby mood, so you could try it. Also get lots of sleep. I sincerely hope you find something that works for you!!

[quiltsRfun]

Re: How do you get out of the dumps ?

Adding to Jean's suggestion to focus on one thing to do each day

When I was suffering from major depression, my life and the world around me seemed very dark and gloomy. I gave myself the assignment to find one thing of beauty each day. It could be a leaf, a sunset, the blue sky and clouds, the silhouette of a leafless tree against the winter sky, a kind person, something I accomplished. Just small things, really. Now, years later and the depression is under control, I still find myself looking for that one thing of beauty and it still brightens my day.

Hang in there Bob. You've been through a lot but things will get better.

[GuitarGramma]

Re: How do you get out of the dumps ?

Bob, I suffered from terrible depression. I was (still am) married to a saint, had four wonderful children, lived in a palace and sat on the couch sobbing every day. Couldn't sleep. Worse too, but I won't put that into print.

What I'm going to tell you that helped me doesn't work for everyone, but it's cheap and the only side effect is, um, a certain loosening. Enough said about that. Here's my story.

I read that depression can be caused by magnesium deficiency. I obtained some egery day over the counter magnesium, and took my first dose. Within two hours, the black clouds that surrounded me lifted. If I missed a day, they'd descend around me again. When I'd take more, the clouds would lift again. I have shared this with many people and it has worked for so many of them.

Please try some magnesium and see if it helps you feel better. I hope it will work for you.

[redcaboose1717]

Re: How do you get out of the dumps ?

Maybe a change of scenery.....perhaps meeting new people. Perhaps you should call the local Chamber of Commerce in Fulton to see what the city has to offer in the way of things to do .

I took the liberty to look up Fulton MO to see if they had a Senior Citizen Center......They have lunches there. Here where I live there's a Senior Citizen Center in every township. They offer lunch certain days of the week and then play cards / games afterwards or spend time chatting. Sometimes people come in to show different hobbies etc. Maybe they do the same type of activities in Fulton MO that they do in Michigan ! LOL ! Most of the seniors here in the town I live in go to all the senior centers throughout the week.....simply because not all of them are open 5 days. That way too, they get to meet new people etc.

Anyway Bob here's the link to the Callaway Senior Center......

https://callawayseniorcenter.wordpress.com/

What about volunteering at the local hospital ? There's all kinds of things to do for volunteer work at the hospitals.....something that require standing but there are things ( such as stuffing envelopes etc. or working in the surgery waiting rooms etc.

You also could see if you could volunteer at the local elementary schools The schools always need people to help the children learn to read better. Here in our town the program for the kids is called H.O.S.T.S ( Help One Student To Succeed )

I have a friend that loves volunteer to be a greeter at the local Theater Group here at our college. That way, he gets to watch all the plays and shows that are booked there for FREE !

DH wants on the PC.....so I have to get off.....check around in your new area....there has to be something new to do there ! Doing something different just might make you feel better Bob !

[TMP]

Re: How do you get out of the dumps ?

Hugs to you. I have missed reading your post here and I hope we hear from you more often. I also hope your health continues to improve. I do not really have any advice other than to tell you it helps me to get up, get dressed and get out of the house some. (even its just walking around in Walmart or the mall ). I am surprised how much better I feel just doing that. I think Jean has some great advise one small task at a time. I hope you have a doctor you feel comfortable talking with and let him know how you feel.

[Bjvarizona]

Re: How do you get out of the dumps ?

You took the first step by checking in here! Some good insights and experiences have been shared, too. I still remember your Walmart thread experience and it always makes me read any posting by you first, just to smile at your words. I've wondered, too, how your beautiful dinnerware survived the move. I hope you were able to take that Fiesta-ware. And are you living with your friend? That is a big deal, living with another person is a big adjustment. Try to remember why you planned to do that. Here's hoping that just reading posts here brings up your spirits. Have you been able to carve out space for your quilting? So make a few mug rugs if you have, something small and quick, to feel like you've accomplished that one thing Jean talked about, even if you only to choose some fabric today. Send us a note often, 'cause we want to hear how you are doing, as often as we can! Hugs to you, Bev

[snippet]

Re: How do you get out of the dumps ?

Oh Bob, I could write tons about being in the dumps. I have made myself many holes to wallow in over my lifetime. That's what I call them - holes. Because they are empty places in my life and so very hard to climb out of.

Like the others have said there are certain things to remember and are worth repeating:

• being in a hole is ok for short periods of time
• one step at a time, don't overdo it
• don't EVER feel bad about being in the hole, you should NEVER feel guilty about it
• if something doesn't work, that's ok. move on to the next

So not everything will be a golden ticket out of the hole but some of these seem to work for me.

• try to get out of bed every day
• try to get dressed
• try to take a shower, brush your teeth, you know -- hygiene
• get a timer and use it for those overwhelming things. Set the timer for 20 minutes and do that chore until the timer rings.
• write something you did today on your calendar

I also have a little list that I made during a hospital stay one time. I have it printed and I refer to it a lot. It's also really good to give to friends and family who don't understand: https://drive.google.com/open?id=1wB...2cnSkpla4zpjPA

Give me a shout ANYTIME day or night.

[MayinJerset]

Re: How do you get out of the dumps ?

hug charlie brown.jpgNo Advice but thought you could use a HUG. Hang in there Big Guy.

[Bouse]

Re: How do you get out of the dumps ?

You had an awful lot happening at one time so it's no wonder it's taking you a while to adjust. The other posters have offered you far more advice than I could but know that you are in our thoughts and prayers right now and hopefully our combined support will raise your morale a little bit.