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Blondie
January 27th, 2016, 09:14 AM
125050


Good Morning and hello, Folksies

I am running late - what else is new. School is back in session today and is on a two hour delay. I have had my husband home from work for two weeks. Count 'em two weeks. First was exam week, where he only drove the bus and was home during the school hours. Then there were three days off - MLK Day, two teacher workdays. Then we had the snow. A big bunch of it. We lost power for a wee bit, which was fine. Didn't last too long. However, The Hill was FINALLY scraped yesterday afternoon. And we lost power again for about 2 hours. My sleep schedule is all messed up, my days are hard to decipher - I am posting here because it is the most recent daily entry I have seen. So, Wednesday it is! Huzzah!

Ok, so all you ladies dealing with men who are retired - tell me how you do it? I love my man more than I love potato chips and hershey bars - I just get nothing done when he is home. I am going to try to turn a new leaf regarding that and need suggestions! Last week just before the snow arrived we went to a retirement meeting to see just when it is feasible and logical for him to retire. Oy. Vey. I am so not ready for this. My small little apple cart is gonna need a new tire!

This weekend DD and her hubs will make their first foray into Florida. (say that three times fast) Sis and I will babysit the dogs and stay at their house. After being snowbound, we are both looking forward to some sister time.
I need to bind a few quilts and finish crocheting a warm muffler for me. I am grooving on getting this one done. It is nothing fancy - just double crochet about 7 inches wide. Don't ask how long it will be because it will be long enough when I am done. I have 3 skeins of yarn and only used a little bit to make Gracie and one of my sister's dogs hats out of.

If you are happy and you know it, smile. If you love your husband but need me time each day and haven't had it for 3 weeks, raise your hand and say I feel your pain. If you regret reading this but still feel my pain, thank you.




125051

Patsquilting
January 27th, 2016, 09:53 AM
Good Morning: I feel your pain! I just retired - hoping I would have at least a year before hubby retired. But, NO, he is retiring in April - then we are looking at a move south (TN or NC - still looking around) I keep telling him - He BETTER find a part time job. Like you, I love him, but there are limits!! Have a terrific day everyone - Yes, it is Wednesday - Choir practice tonight.

Angela J
January 27th, 2016, 09:54 AM
My husband has been retired for three years. He got so bored the first year he found a part-time job. I wish he would find a hobby other than going on cruises with his brother or our daughter. He has always loved to travel and I don't begrudge him taking a couple of trips a year. I just wish he would budget better.

DeniseSm
January 27th, 2016, 10:00 AM
Everybody needs some "me" time. It sounds like your husband needs a hobby of his own. How about golf or wood working? My DH is happily engaged playing interactive on line games. He can play solo or in groups. He wears a headset with a built in microphone to talk with the other players. His favorite is Star Wars.

Oddly enough spring has already arrived early here in Texas. The daffodils are up but not blooming yet, the roses are blooming, and the bluebirds are nesting in the bird house already.

Sandy Navas
January 27th, 2016, 10:13 AM
How great to see you stick your head out of the snow pile!!

I'll send LL a coloring book and a giant box of Crayolas!!

TMP
January 27th, 2016, 10:53 AM
My husband is retiring within the next few weeks. The exact day we are not sure of, it will be when this project is complete. The man has worked since he was 10 years old constantly (he is due some rest). He really doesn't have hobbies other than reading. I give him about 6 months before he is climbing the walls and looks for a job. His work has taken him out of town at times for days and other times years, so I am used to having my alone time etc. I also love him to death, but I am not sure how I really feel about having him here 24 hrs /7 days a week. I am interesting in finding out how others have dealt with this and I am really feeling bad that I feel this way.

URIBARRI-MAYOR
January 27th, 2016, 10:58 AM
Hello Blondie and friends of the forum, I think you´re right, men retire when things look very dark and not know what to do and believe that women should be eye on them all day,so it is interesting to seeking a hobby is different, my DH was retired two years ago but is coming to your company and does office work but that does not attend day is dedicated to stroll through the surrounding mountains (The mountaineering is a very popular sport in my country) or will to fish a small boat you have, so let me enough free time for me I hope find something that makes you happy and you have time to share with us and make this work so fond, send greeting and wishes everyone this good

Monique
January 27th, 2016, 10:58 AM
I thought you might be gone till Groundhog DAY!! Welcome back, girlfriend.

carrie liz
January 27th, 2016, 11:02 AM
Retirement was hard at first. DH missed having people to talk to as well as the work itself. Now he is involved in all sorts of hobbies as well as senior golf. I managed that first year by getting a part time job at a local quilt store. DH was forced to entertain himself while I was at work.

Lyndaj
January 27th, 2016, 11:26 AM
I can sort of relate. My DH had three weeks off over Christmas/New Years because he had shoulder surgery on January 6, and he has been working part days for the last two weeks. He is in a sling for 6 weeks (3 weeks today, so 3 to go). I have been unemployed since August 31 and have my things that I like to do and he has been cramping my style. He is a woodturner in his spare time, which he obviously can't do (forgot to mention that it was his right shoulder and he is right handed) and probably won't be able to do for 3-6 months. So when he is home, I feel like I have to keep him company. Sigh.

Jean Sewing Machine
January 27th, 2016, 11:45 AM
Glad to see you back, Blondie! We've all certainly been thinking of you!

About husbands. They can be a pain when underfoot. But when they are taken from you too soon, you sure do miss them! We never spent retirement time together except after mine was diagnosed with brain cancer, and our remaining time was spent in doctor's offices and hospitals. Enjoy life together while you can. Travel, dine out, play! It's important!

Cutting out a NCW to keep my busy until my backing comes for my daughter's quilt. Plus still working on putting the sewing studio together. Yesterday was a bust, nothing really accomplished! Hopefully today won't be a repeat of that!

SallyO'Sews
January 27th, 2016, 12:08 PM
1. Spring begins in 22 days: 2016 Spring Training Reporting Dates (http://www.springtrainingconnection.com/reportingdates.html)

2. *waves hand* I feel your pain! My DH is SOOOO wonderful, but in the evenings after work when I want (no, NEED) to go spend some quality time in my sewing room, he acts like he's so lonely without me. Not complaining, mind you, because I'm pretty sure I'd be really upset if he did NOT want to spend time together. I've invited him to come in my sewing room and watch TV on the computer while I sew, but he has graciously declined that offer (I actually think he may be afraid he'll get sucked into the quilting vortex).

3. What was it that lady said when her hubby retired? "For better or worse, but not for lunch!" :lol:

Have a great day, ladies!

MayinJerset
January 27th, 2016, 12:28 PM
Happy that you're back Blondie.

My DH retired a few years before me so when I retired I cramped his style. LOL.

Cowgirl quilter
January 27th, 2016, 01:10 PM
Hey, I've lived our whole married life with my DH underfoot and I do understand. The joys of self employment. There are days when I get nothing I planned to do done. On the other hand, we are approaching our 40th anniversary and we are still best friends, so we make it work.

Claire Hallman
January 27th, 2016, 01:25 PM
It took a good 6 months for us to find a routine after DH retired. Part of the time he helped my with my drapery business but that has been closed for 6 years now. We have a routine that usually doesn't involve one another during the day. He plays golf twice a week when we have good weather but this time of year he just watches it on TV. He does help by cleaning the floors and sometimes folding laundry.
It works OK and I could not do without him.

Kat Smith
January 27th, 2016, 01:28 PM
Ahhh the hubby around all day, mine is a self employed musician and has always , for our whole 35 yrs of marriage been home. Does his booking from home, practices at home, home, home home, home. When we were young and first married he was playing in rock bands and would be at work all evening 6 days a week, but h e would leave for work later in the evening, and it wasn't long before I would head to bed so it was like he was always here. There is very little live music in the bars and clubs here anymore, and there just isn't the money for a whole band. Now he plays at Retirement Villas, Seniors Homes , Hospitals, Day Club Happy hours etc. He is only gone for a little over an hour at a time now, so he is home even more. The real funny thing is that the clientele has almost caught up again. Getting requests for some of the stuff he played in rock bands in his 20,s. In the winter here it gets pretty cold and we get lots of snow so you can get pretty house bound, but he has become quite a wanderer , and especially in the summer can be gone for hours and hours. We have managed to find ways to carve out some alone time and he has been really supportive of my new interest in quilting. When I am working on something and have barely come out of the sewing room or 3 days I try to remember to ask him if he has been feeling neglected, he is pretty good and always says no he is okay, he has even mastered the frozen pizza.

Hope all are having a great day and find some way to take care of yourself today, even if it's just to take a few min to just be quite and reflect on all we have.

Kathy

sewbizzy
January 27th, 2016, 01:36 PM
Yea!!! I'm glad you are back Blondie....I love reading your posts...
my dh retired 4 years ago and about 2 weeks later his health started to fail...hopefully, the worst is behind us...
I know exactly what you mean about them being around all day...he loves to hunt, but can't go out in the woods like he used to...he does help me around the house, which I am thankful for
also, he loves tv...he would watch it all day...
I look forward to when the weather is nicer here in western PA,...he likes to putter in the yard....we like to sit on the front porch...I take my hand stitching out with me...then our neighbors stop over to visit...
It is definitely a life style changer!!

LauraP
January 27th, 2016, 02:15 PM
I bought mine a gyrocopter and send him flying. If all else fails I tell him it is dusty and needs polished. See the pictures in my album

alliek
January 27th, 2016, 02:17 PM
It's difficult at first, like finding your "sea legs". You have to find a different rhythm to your day. The good news..... You Will. May take some time and give and take on both parts but time will settle the days. What a blessing to be able to retire and have some days together. Then of course there are the times we need to be alone. You will balance it all out when you have too. Many blessings on your new adventure in life.

EnumclawGramma
January 27th, 2016, 02:32 PM
Good Morning Blondie! I feel your pain!! My DH has pushed retirement out two more years and I have real mixed emotions about this. I LOVE hanging out with him and having him home (he's here today, sick), but I also love my quiet time. He LOVES to cook and watch cooking shows, and could do either or both all day every day. This is good for him, not so much for me. You know? But he is my best friend and the love of my life. 41 years and counting. We will figure this out, together!

So the big bad bug has come to my house and seems to like it here. First me, then him. It's BAD. I don't know if it's the flu or just a whopping cold. This is the first time I've been sick in two years. Yucko! My Grands started this, I shoulda known! Petri dishes all of them! LOL

I may take this day to get some sewing done. It's chilly, it's rainy and it's foggy and I'm not needed anywhere else. What would YOU do? *SMILE*

toggpine
January 27th, 2016, 02:38 PM
Mine isn't retired yet. He just has worked with the same company for so long that he has quite the amount of vacation built up. He was home between Christmas and New Years, and I swear, every time I went to do a household chore he was somehow in the way. He would decide that while I was emptying the dishwasher, it was the perfect time to make something to eat. Or hey, she's doing laundry, I need to go outside and must stand in front of the machines while I fiddle with the coveralls and my coats. Argh!
At least he doesn't follow me around like a puppy. He had valid reasons for being in those places, but a few minutes either direction would have kept him from being in the way.
I won't complain about him as he cooks, does his own laundry, and cleans (if he has to). There are gals with much worse to deal with. We will just have to learn how to do the daily house chore dance without stomping on each others toes!

Navy Wife
January 27th, 2016, 03:46 PM
Well, mine has been retired for 24 years. It isn't easy, but it can be done! He helped build out house first, then got involved with Habitat. Then we started volunteering at Snake River Ranger Station in Yellowstone. That took care of our summers, and we went to Florida in the winter. Since then, he has flown RC airplanes and loved it till his eyesight got bad enough so he couldn't see the planes in the air. Now he is painting, and turning out some very good paintings of our beloved Smokies. We have square danced and traveled a lot. We have an RV, and have spent summers in Vermont and Wisconsin. We have traveled all over to visit our Navy son, and our married to Navy daughter. We have had a ball, but the first year was rough. Now is even rougher. He has spinal stenosis and is in constant pain. We have been married 60 years, and I feel every pain he has. He hates not being able to do things for himself, but I keep reminding him of the good times and how much he helped then. I get mad at him sometimes...I could scream and yell, but it does no good because he's deaf! He has taken very good care of me all these years, and now it's my turn. We have 2 sons nearby, and they help out when we need it. Enjoy retirement while you can. All too soon it ends in sorrow for one of you. Sorry to have preached a sermon, but I needed to put all my thoughts together for me!

ceiliam
January 27th, 2016, 04:06 PM
Afternoon all. Welcome back Blondie missed you glad you dug out. You had great people filling in for you. Retirement is hard no matter who you are took me a while to figure it out. Would love part time job however there is a bit of age discrimination here but can't prove it. I can't sit down for long periods or stand either . been tearing sewing room apart looking for one of my Bonnie Hunter books know its there but no luck so far guess that's why I'm cleaning it . hope all have a great day. Cecelia

SewnByBee
January 27th, 2016, 04:12 PM
Hey there Blondie. I see I'm bnot the only one who can't get things done with occupied space interruption. Lol

I've had this challenge since the routine changed when the kids got out of high school. I can't even imagine having someone here all the time. I can't get my stuff done with people around me. I just can't. This is partly why things have gotten so behind.

I wish you much luck.....mine has a shop where he works on cars. He will probably spend a lot of time there when retirement comes. I don't know how elts to think about it. He has to be busy.

I do appreciate my me time. I have to get some kind of a routine put back in place. This has been terrible on my nerves. Hopefully I'll get it pulled back together. I wish I had given more thought to this and not been so stumped by it. Reality......... who knew it would be so hard......jumping hurdles.

IT will get easier with time and some rearranging daily doings. Eventually it will get there......I hope. Good luck.......
...........................................125060. ............keep Smiling.

Judy, USMC
January 27th, 2016, 04:13 PM
Aaahhhh YES! Retirement .... Twice the husband and half the money!!!!

We were relatively young when we retired from the Marine Corps (40.) Life has taken us into various - and separate - interests and activities over the years but all that changed in 2010 when he had his heart attack and quad bypass surgery. Since then he is very, VERY content to be a couch potato ... no matter where he's at! His suggestion is to get any man cable TV, a computer and a big screen TV. He's good to travel with me and loves to drive so we do get to travel quite a bit but doesn't like to go off by himself.

I schedule my alone time by taking mini vacations by myself. There's a time-share condo 35 miles away that I can get at a very reasonable weekly rate during the winter months so I grab my material and machine and take off when he gets on my nerves. Luckily he can take care of himself on a daily basis and is comfortable at home (yep, with his 'puter, big screen & recliner, lol.) But he can come up for a night or two if he wants.

My advice on retirement - just take it one day at a time. Don't feel like you have to dote on him but do be considerate since it will be a bigger adjustment for him - and watch out for depression. I'm amazed how many guys get a feeling of worthlessness. So to give my guy a sense of importance he is responsible for lunch every day and does me favors (like taking my Block to Staples to get spiral bound which I put on his "To Do" list for today.)

Jean is 100% correct ... appreciate him and do things together while you can.

SewnByBee
January 27th, 2016, 04:38 PM
Well, mine has been retired for 24 years. It isn't easy, but it can be done! He helped build out house first, then got involved with Habitat. Then we started volunteering at Snake River Ranger Station in Yellowstone. That took care of our summers, and we went to Florida in the winter. Since then, he has flown RC airplanes and loved it till his eyesight got bad enough so he couldn't see the planes in the air. Now he is painting, and turning out some very good paintings of our beloved Smokies. We have square danced and traveled a lot. We have an RV, and have spent summers in Vermont and Wisconsin. We have traveled all over to visit our Navy son, and our married to Navy daughter. We have had a ball, but the first year was rough. Now is even rougher. He has spinal stenosis and is in constant pain. We have been married 60 years, and I feel every pain he has. He hates not being able to do things for himself, but I keep reminding him of the good times and how much he helped then. I get mad at him sometimes...I could scream and yell, but it does no good because he's deaf! He has taken very good care of me all these years, and now it's my turn. We have 2 sons nearby, and they help out when we need it. Enjoy retirement while you can. All too soon it ends in sorrow for one of you. Sorry to have preached a sermon, but I needed to put all my thoughts together for me!

Thank you for sharing yyoyour story. Y'all have made your time count. I think this is so important. We love getting to take brakes and get away together. I would love to make plans to have to look forward to.Even if it's just to a nearby lake or somewhere we can enjoy. I've been wanting to look into the cabins in Tenn. Its just a couple of hours from us. We're just south of Huntsville. We haven't took a trip since before loosing my mom two years ago.

I have Deg. disk back issues. I know how painful this is and limited it can be. So glad he can paint and have a distraction to help him. That's what sewing and quilting is for me. I'm so blessed to have my man who takes care of a lot around here. I'VE. had a hard time adjusting to this. I appreciate everything he does. Bless you both...........Bee

JCY
January 27th, 2016, 05:15 PM
Retirement ~ Check out your local senior center, if there is one in your area. There are so many activities available in most communities for seniors. Also check into volunteering somewhere. Local hospital, etc. One person mentioned Habitat for Humanity. No need to be a couch potato. Stay active. Yes, it's an adjustment, but doable. It gets much more difficult when you have to be the caregiver for your spouse.

I haven't done a stitch of sewing the past several days. I've been very tired, fighting off a bug, I think, or maybe the dental work I'm having done is a factor. Just not feeling up to par.

Eastern snow storm ~ DS didn't travel to D.C. for 2 days; govt. was shut down, but he did work from home. DGD is back at the univ. Schools & businesses are re-opening as snow gets plowed & things are moving again.

Navy Wife
January 27th, 2016, 07:39 PM
JCY, glad to hear things are moving again in DC. My youngest spent quite a few years at the Pentagon while he was on active duty and after retirement with a contractor. They loved the DC area, but now live in Knoxville and love it more. No traffic jams on the interstates, family near by, and not so much stress. I'm glad they're here also! He is a big help to us since they have no children but us!

Neller
January 28th, 2016, 01:42 AM
I'm on the west coast, so I don't suppose any of you east coasters are up anyway. My DH retired about a year before I did. He got up, made me breakfast and a lunch to take to work, drove me to work, picked me up in the evening and had dinner ready. It was nice. I retired in May 2015 and have been the sluggish one. We traveled a bit but mostly I sat on the couch and watched crap TV or slept. Now I am finally coming out of it and have been knitting and sewing every day. It's not my husband being home that bothers me, it is my 91 year old father who lives with us. He gets around on his own steam (sloooowly), but it's like having a kid at home again.

I miss alone time with my husband, and being retired, I would like to be able to take off at a moment's notice, but we can't because we have to figure out what to do with dad. And before anyone gets righteous and tells me I am lucky to still have him, I need to say that my relationship with him has always been complicated and it ain't easy. I am the only sibling who has room for dad or is retired, so he ended up with me. Mostly it's okay, but I sure wish I had some freedom. My DH is taking off tomorrow for a week of golf and poker with his buddies. I wish I had some place to go when he gets back.

kimsophia
January 28th, 2016, 01:47 AM
125050


Ok, so all you ladies dealing with men who are retired - tell me how you do it? I love my man more than I love potato chips and hershey bars - I just get nothing done when he is home. I am going to try to turn a new leaf regarding that and need suggestions! Last week just before the snow arrived we went to a retirement meeting to see just when it is feasible and logical for him to retire. Oy. Vey. I am so not ready for this. My small little apple cart is gonna need a new tire!




125051

Hey, I get all the time alone I need by being a night owl... JOIN US :)

GaGa
January 28th, 2016, 03:04 AM
What great advice from all of you - and so timely! I'm retiring at the end of this school year and I was really hoping I'd have a couple of years "home alone" but DH is working less and less. (He's a large animal vet who's had both a knee and a hip replaced.). The other day when we were both home because of snow, I told him I wasn't sure I was ready for both of us to be retired. He's NEVER helped around the house so I don't see that changing. We do live on a farm and he raises sheep but he's in the house plenty. I love him and we've been married 47 years but he's always wondering what's for breakfast, what's for lunch or what's for dinner. All I do when we are both home is feed him!! Ugh! I too hope I can adjust when the time comes! Quilting may be my one salvation!

Patsquilting
January 28th, 2016, 08:13 AM
Isn't it great to be able to share as we do. We all have similar issues and it's great to know we have our quilting friends to be able to vent to. We are NOT alone!!

kimsophia
January 28th, 2016, 03:44 PM
This morning I woke up around noon and found that the house was empty, except for the cats...it was so quiet. I love it. I love waking up and nobody is home. I wish my DH worked all day again so I could have that every morning. (BTW, he's at a math seminar that is held once a week.) I GET THE COUCH, I GET THE COUCH!!! :D

redcaboose1717
January 28th, 2016, 03:54 PM
My first husband became disabled at an early age....and discovered that there was a model train club in our town.....he joined and had a great time being in the club and being able to get out with the "boys" from time to time. Not only did he enjoy the model train club, but he really enjoyed my parents as well. Both my parents and my DH spent a lot of time together prior to my retirement as well. He passed away in 2002.
I remarried a few years ago, and my new husband decided to take an early retirement 3 yrs ago.. He has no hobbies to speak of and sits in front of his computer for hours. I have tried to convince him that we should spend out winters in Florida, but I haven't had too much success in talking him into that, even though each and every year he complains a lot about the snow and cold weather. I have a few friend that now spend their winters in Florida and reside 5-6 months out of the year enjoying the warmer climate and the activities that they have in their respective 55+ mobile home parks or 55+ apartment complexes.
Hopefully I can convince him to spend the winter next year in a warmer climate. I have been looking for places to either purchase or rent, so it isn't a shock to him that I am looking ! LOL !