View Full Version : Breaks my heart.

November 15th, 2015, 11:27 PM
I got a very bad call at work Tuesday morning. It was my best friend of 43 years. They had found her daughter dead. She was just 31 years old. She leaves a 5 year old son and a 13 year old daughter. It hurts me so bad to see my friend so sad. The funeral and visitation was today. As I stood there at the graveside I could not imagine being in my friends place. This has really effected me. I wish there was something I could do or say to help her pain but I can't. I feel so very bad for her and her grandkids. I have cried all afternoon. I just don't know what to do other than pray for her family.

I know we aren't supposed to ask why but I just don't understand.......

Sandy Navas
November 15th, 2015, 11:34 PM
Rhonda, we'll never, never, never understand. Prayers for the whole family and all her friends!!

November 15th, 2015, 11:53 PM
I've been in your position, knowing that there really isn't a thing you can say or do to help with the pain. I made my friend a lap size rag quilt and brought it to her. I told her I would always have a shoulder and an ear to listen anytime she needed to vent but when she just wanted to be alone to wrap herself in my rag quilt and it would be like I was there hugging and comforting her without invading her space. Her sister called me and told me that what I did was the best thing ever and that she was telling everyone that she always has a hug from me anytime she needs it. For me, that meant a lot because I really have a hard time with what I should say in difficult situations. Prayers for you, your friend and her family.

November 16th, 2015, 12:09 AM
Oh boy... such a difficult situation :(
Maybe just let her know that there are no right words to say, but that you are there for her if she needs to talk/cry/scream/pound something.....
Praying for all involved.

Carlie Wolf
November 16th, 2015, 12:09 AM
I'm so sorry to hear this. You and your friend and her family are in my prayers.

November 16th, 2015, 12:20 AM
Rhonda, I am very sorry for your friends loss as I know what she is going through having lost my son in March and he was just 25. He left behind a 3 year old little boy a little girl who had just turned a year old a month before and 2 stepsons 7 and 8 years old.
There is really not anything you can do but be there for them physically and emotionally. Keep them in prayer, I still ask why but there are no answers to why these things happen. And I still have very hard days but I have to be strong for the little ones as were helping raise them. I will keep them in prayer with you.


November 16th, 2015, 01:22 AM
Rhonda - I am very sorry to hear this. I will keep you and her with family in my prayers.

November 16th, 2015, 01:30 AM
May God bless & comfort you in your loss & be with your friend. Sometimes words are not needed. Just knowing you care means a lot.

November 16th, 2015, 01:34 AM
This is so awful, I feel so bad for everyone whose lives that young girl touched. You are right, there are no words to make it better because you just can't fix it, no one can. Just let your friend know you are there for her day or night no matter what. But if you have been her friend for that many years she already knows she can count on you. I love the idea of making her a special quilt that someone here suggested, if you are feeling up to it. It would probably be very comforting. And maybe just the act of making it for her would bring comfort to you too. If you can see through your tears. Oh life is so unfair sometimes.

November 16th, 2015, 02:48 AM
Rhonda I am sorry for your friends loss.I understand her pain somewhat we got a phone call about my brother having passed and he was 38 I helped my father go through this the best I could.Like the others said there are no words but be there even if it's just to hold her and let her be weak when there is a strong person to hold on to her.

November 16th, 2015, 04:06 AM
So sorry to hear this. Like others have said, there is no way to understand why these things happen in this life. Just be there for her when the reality of it all hits.

Prayers for all of you...


November 16th, 2015, 04:12 AM
This is so terribly sad. Prayers for your friend and for you.

November 16th, 2015, 08:13 AM
So sorry for your friend's loss.

November 16th, 2015, 08:17 AM

November 16th, 2015, 08:19 AM
Rhonda, I understand your sentiments. It's only natural to ask why!
Be the friend you have been through 43 years. That's a lot of history, lots of ups and downs. After the initial shock wears off and the phone calls and folks stop dropping off food and cards - that is when she will need you. Words are not always heard but your presence will always be a comfort. Prayers for all involved, sweet girl.

November 16th, 2015, 09:34 AM
Dear Rhonda - so sorry, prayers for strength and comfort going up for you and your dear friend's family

November 16th, 2015, 09:38 AM
Rhonda, I'm so sorry. Just be there for your friend...she's going to need you more in coming days. (((HUGS)))

November 16th, 2015, 10:30 AM
Rhonda... My heart aches for your friend, and for you... As Sandy has said...... We'll neve, never, never understand... At least not in this life.... Hugs to all of you...

November 16th, 2015, 10:32 AM
Sending prayer and thoughts for comfort and strength. And as Blondie said she will need you even more later. Big hug to you all.

November 16th, 2015, 11:48 AM
Rhonda, I am so very sorry for your friend's loss and for all the pain you all are feeling. There are so many things in this life that we just simply cannot understand and agree with others that we never will as long as we are here on earth.

I am also so sorry for the others here who have mentioned their losses. Prayers being said for each and everyone of you.

I know you feel terribly helpless but I am sure you being there for your friend means the world to her. Again so very sorry.

November 16th, 2015, 11:56 AM
I wish there was a why but sometimes there just isn't. Just be there for her however you can. Let her know your there and available its all any of us can really do. So sorry for the loss but glad she has you there to support her.

November 16th, 2015, 12:44 PM
I am so sorry for your friends loss as well as yours. When we lost my sweet 24 year old nephew I made quilts for my sister and whole family quiled Trent's name in them all and named them Trent's hug, that way when sad they could wrap up in them and know that Trent was with them. Be there after everyone else goes on with their lives. She is going to need you to listen to cry on.

November 18th, 2015, 09:07 PM
So sorry for your friend. I can't imagine losing a child. Will say prayers for her children and ask God to wrap his arms around you all and give you some comfort during this time.

November 20th, 2015, 01:36 PM
Rhonda, as expressed by others, I am so very sorry for your friend. There are never any words....there is only the heart. Follow your heart and the love you share in your friendship together. :icon_hug:

November 20th, 2015, 03:06 PM
I'm so sad for you, Rhonda, and for her family. Such a tragedy when someone so young dies. My heart is really hurting for her little ones.

November 20th, 2015, 03:51 PM
Just now hearing about this. So very sorry for you and your DF. I can't imagine what she must be going through. Prayers for all.