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View Full Version : My turn! Little things that are disturbing.



Sandy Navas
April 6th, 2015, 03:12 PM
Is there a handbook for waitresses?

Does it state that EVERY one should be called Sweetie, Babe, Honey, Hon, Sweetheart, Doll, Angel, Cutie?

Does it state that every time you pass someone's table you call them some sweet endearing name, ad nauseam?

Over and out!

WendyI
April 6th, 2015, 03:15 PM
LOL That doesn't really happen here...but the odd time it does it doesn't bother me. I do NOT like to be called Mam tho!

buckeyequilter
April 6th, 2015, 03:15 PM
I know LOL

But I guess it's better than.......Gramps, Granny, Dude, Dudette...haha

pcbatiks
April 6th, 2015, 03:26 PM
What are you trying to say, Sugar Dumplin' Sweetie Pie? :icon_rofl:

kimsophia
April 6th, 2015, 03:26 PM
Maybe it's a southern thing?...It's never happened to me in Iowa in 53 years...

Hulamoon
April 6th, 2015, 03:36 PM
I don't hear that over here. But it seems I'm Auntie to hundreds of people. I just shrug it off. It was wierd for awhile though. lol

MayinJerset
April 6th, 2015, 03:42 PM
What about when you have a mouth full of food and your server stops by the table to ask if everything is OK. That question can be answered with a nod of your head but then they continue to ask, More coffee, bread or whatever? which requires you to speak. You can either swallow or spit out your food to answer, whatever you do ruins your meal.

Wwena
April 6th, 2015, 04:09 PM
That NEVER happens around here and I think it's so endeering when I encounter it abroad. I can understand how it gets annoying when it happens all the time, but imagine if it NEVER did. ;)

Monique
April 6th, 2015, 04:17 PM
Aw honey.................

quiltsRfun
April 6th, 2015, 04:31 PM
LOL That doesn't really happen here...but the odd time it does it doesn't bother me. I do NOT like to be called Mam tho!

Even worse is being called "young lady" when obviously you're not. Might as well call me an old lady, I got the message.

shirleyknot
April 6th, 2015, 05:04 PM
Is there a handbook for waitresses?

Does it state that EVERY one should be called Sweetie, Babe, Honey, Hon, Sweetheart, Doll, Angel, Cutie?

Does it state that every time you pass someone's table you call them some sweet endearing name, ad nauseam?

Over and out!

You think THAT'S a problem. Pass the age of 65 in THIS part of the country and every..single..person..under the age of 50 feels the right to call you ALL of the above, except perhaps doll and cutie. In the library, in the grocery store, at the shoe store, etc.

kimsophia
April 6th, 2015, 05:05 PM
Even worse is being called "young lady" when obviously you're not. Might as well call me an old lady, I got the message.

Oh yeah. That one jerks my chain real bad!

CraftHer
April 6th, 2015, 05:09 PM
Even worse is being called "young lady" when obviously you're not. Might as well call me an old lady, I got the message.

I just thought of this comeback "Wow, if you think I'm a "young lady" you must really be old!" course I'd never say it, unless it's accompanied by "Bless your heart".

I think all the endearments are more of a southern thing.

buckeyequilter
April 6th, 2015, 06:47 PM
I just thought of this comeback "Wow, if you think I'm a "young lady" you must really be old!" course I'd never say it, unless it's accompanied by "Bless your heart".

I think all the endearments are more of a southern thing.

It happens around here a lot. It's probably in the rule book, the chapter on how to get better tips.

irishrn
April 6th, 2015, 06:54 PM
It took some getting used to when we moved from NYC to NC!!
But I don't take offense to anything but MAMA! I'm not your mama!!
Men especially seem to want to use that one!

Divine Daisy
April 6th, 2015, 07:06 PM
errm.....ok I could not take it! I would have to say I am NOT your....a..........b.......c.......d....whatever they said. But then I am British and we don't go in for such endearments........unless it's 'me duck', 'pet' or if they are very brave 'lover'.

They can call me a snotty b**tch if they like but.....cutie??????????? And I bet they are all about 12!

Another thing I hate is to be told to 'have a nice day'. They don't give a whatsit what kind of day I have lets be honest. Bottom line is insincerity just gets my goat.

And ...............breaths

KathyCrofoot
April 6th, 2015, 07:19 PM
How about 'You Guys" when it's just you and your husband - sets my teeth on edge!

LoveMyMachines
April 6th, 2015, 07:39 PM
Funny. I used to thing it was just a southern thing. However, the first time it happened at work (and I'm an engineer at a technical firm), I certainly did a double take. I'm used to it now, and being one of the "younger" folk at the establishment (I'm close to 40) I just laugh it off. I always know if I make these people mad, because they stop calling me "sweetie"! :D

Now, if they start calling me "sugar"...

asta
April 6th, 2015, 07:47 PM
And...."what can I get for the little lady?" How about some glasses for the waitress.

Carrie J
April 6th, 2015, 07:55 PM
ROFL, yeah, it's not just here in Texas, and I usually say, "Wellllll Bless yore lil pea-pickin' heart!". Interject heavy Texas twanging sarcasm, that usually gets the message across real quick, reverts to Ma'am thereafter. :icon_eek: And yes, they're all under the age of 25 that do this!!! Hubs just says, "How about we just keep it to "What would you like this evening Sir." Makes me spew tea when he does that! :D

Sylvia H
April 6th, 2015, 08:04 PM
Even worse is being called "young lady" when obviously you're not. Might as well call me an old lady, I got the message.

I was about to post the same thing. It really irks me. Most of the time, I know the person is really trying to be nice, and I don't say anything. However, there are times when you just know they are being condescending. I still don't say anything, as it wouldn't matter to the person anyway. Hmmmm.....I just had an idea, the next time someone says that to me in an obviously insincere way, I am going to tell that person they need to get their eyes examined!

dwil23
April 6th, 2015, 08:28 PM
It took some getting used to when we moved from NYC to NC!!
But I don't take offense to anything but MAMA! I'm not your mama!!
Men especially seem to want to use that one!


I don't usually take offense to any of these things, but "MAMA" does tend to annoy me. I feel more often than not is not it is used in a more condescending than endearing way. I'm with Wendy, don't really like to be called "Mam", either.

GuitarGramma
April 6th, 2015, 08:45 PM
I waitressed my way through college, and over the course of four years worked morning, swing and graveyard depending on what opening was available. I saw the lonely folks who eat out because they would be all alone at home. I saw the families who just needed a break. I saw the multiple generations who wanted to be together, the teens who wanted a safe place to hang out, and I even served a piece of pie to Kenny Rogers! But I never, ever, ever called anyone "Sweetie" or "Sugar" or "Baby Doll," etc. etc. etc.

I have noticed that in restaurants today, both high end and low, the wait staff seems to feel that their need to find out if "everything's all right" absolutely trumps your right to finish your sentence with your table companion. It drives me nuts. I ALWAYS waited for a break in a table's conversation before I'd speak. It was especially bad when we went out with aging parents last week. I could not believe the combination of rudeness and oblivion with which we were met. There had been two deaths in the family--so you can imagine the mood--and we were deep in conversation. But "Would you like some more water?" was obviously more important than anything we had to say.

Rant over. Thanks for letting me vent.

buckeyequilter
April 6th, 2015, 09:08 PM
I am nice to the people preparing and bringing my food, even if they do get on my nerves. I don't like to think about what might happen to my food, if I'm not - maybe even if I am.

shirleyknot
April 6th, 2015, 09:51 PM
I waitressed my way through college, and over the course of four years worked morning, swing and graveyard depending on what opening was available. I saw the lonely folks who eat out because they would be all alone at home. I saw the families who just needed a break. I saw the multiple generations who wanted to be together, the teens who wanted a safe place to hang out, and I even served a piece of pie to Kenny Rogers! But I never, ever, ever called anyone "Sweetie" or "Sugar" or "Baby Doll," etc. etc. et

I have noticed that in restaurants today, both high end and low, the wait staff seems to feel that their need to find out if "everything's all right" absolutely trumps your right to finish your sentence with your table companion. It drives me nuts. I ALWAYS waited for a break in a table's conversation before I'd speak. It was especially bad when we went out with aging parents last week. I could not believe the combination of rudeness and oblivion with which we were met. There had been two deaths in the family--so you can imagine the mood--and we were deep in conversation. But "Would you like some more water?" was obviously more important than anything we had to say.

Rant over. Thanks for letting me vent.

I really think you should be running a training school for waitstaff. Kudos to you.

shirleyknot
April 6th, 2015, 09:54 PM
I was about to post the same thing. It really irks me. Most of the time, I know the person is really trying to be nice, and I don't say anything. However, there are times when you just know they are being condescending. I still don't say anything, as it wouldn't matter to the person anyway. Hmmmm.....I just had an idea, the next time someone says that to me in an obviously insincere way, I am going to tell that person they need to get their eyes examined!

You know "that look" you give your kids when they tell an obvious untruth? It really works well in these cases.

BellasQuilts
April 6th, 2015, 11:33 PM
Better than some others...just sayin....

Sandy Navas
April 6th, 2015, 11:35 PM
I am nice to the people preparing and bringing my food, even if they do get on my nerves. I don't like to think about what might happen to my food, if I'm not - maybe even if I am.

Oh, believe me, you can't meet any nicer persons, face-to-face, than me and my dear Al - we truly believe in tipping and probably are over-tippers (according to whose standards? We do respect that people do these jobs because they . . . well, need the money) . . . and I'd never say anything rude to someone who is serving me in any way, shape or form - but it sure doesn't aid in my digestion!!

I so wanted to take her aside and tell her it wasn't always appreciated . . .

Sandy Navas
April 6th, 2015, 11:37 PM
How about 'You Guys" when it's just you and your husband - sets my teeth on edge!

Or the time I took my 85+YO Mother into a furniture store and the salesman said "What can I do for you GIRLS today?"

That time I let him know that we quit being girls when we had our first orgasm!!

K. McEuen
April 6th, 2015, 11:42 PM
Just an FYI - "You guys" is a regional slang meaning the same as y'all, youse guys, you'uns, etc. depending on what part of the coutry the speaker is from. It is not that they can't tell what sex you are.

BobW
April 6th, 2015, 11:43 PM
Or the time I took my 85+YO Mother into a furniture store and the salesman said "What can I do for you GIRLS today?"

That time I let him know that we quit being girls when we had our first orgasm!!

Sandy said ORGASM -- And every one thinks I need to be supervised! HA! Even taking my pain meds I wouldn't go that far. LOL

K. McEuen
April 6th, 2015, 11:45 PM
Sandy said ORGASM -- And every one thinks I need to be supervised! HA! Even taking my pain meds I wouldn't go that far. LOL

You just did, boB

Hulamoon
April 7th, 2015, 12:07 AM
Or the time I took my 85+YO Mother into a furniture store and the salesman said "What can I do for you GIRLS today?"

That time I let him know that we quit being girls when we had our first orgasm!!

I think I said something worse, in front of my dd's friends that came for dinner (I think it was sushi Night) I let out a joke that I was Japanese by injection. umm. I couldn't live that one down.

Bjvarizona
April 7th, 2015, 01:41 AM
I'm not fond of having a welcome greeting shouted out to me whenever I walk into my pharmacy! I'm sure it's company policy, but, just saying . . . .

buckeyequilter
April 7th, 2015, 12:47 PM
I just went to Domino's to pick up my lunch and was called sweetheart when entering and honey when exiting. LOL

GuitarGramma
April 7th, 2015, 01:15 PM
I think I said something worse, in front of my dd's friends that came for dinner (I think it was sushi Night) I let out a joke that I was Japanese by injection. umm. I couldn't live that one down.

Reminds me (German, Greek, Columbian, Italian) of the time someone asked me if I have any Irish in me. I replied, "Only when I'm pregnant!"

Hulamoon
April 7th, 2015, 01:33 PM
Reminds me (German, Greek, Columbian, Italian) of the time someone asked me if I have any Irish in me. I replied, "Only when I'm pregnant!"

I'm glad i'm not the only one whose mind went that direction. lol

Leah53
April 7th, 2015, 10:18 PM
How about 'You Guys" when it's just you and your husband - sets my teeth on edge!

I'm from Maine and use that all the time, like telling the rowdy kids, "you guys, knock it off". I now live in the land of the southern twang where everyone says "y'all".

I don't know why y'all you guys are so upset, it sure beats being called a **** Yankee, now that's freakin' irritating, and I have often had to remind southerners that to the rest of the world even they are "Yankees".

jjkaiser
April 8th, 2015, 12:52 AM
Kathy Crofoot: You guys is pretty much a midwestern term used by, well everybody in the state of Wisconsin!! I discovered this when living in Tennessee and Kentucky for 15 years. How'd you like being called Sugar instead wherver you go? You guys just seems normal to me--I live in Milwaukee. Better than being called a Cheesehead!!

Mpyles
April 8th, 2015, 02:02 AM
Lol, well I have been known to take someone aside and say " I'm sorry...the only person who calls me sweetie is my husband...and that's not often." It was in a work situation...and it was a server of mine. I don't tolerate it. Everyone should be treated with respect and I encourage our staff to learn their names if they are regulars. As far as the interruptions...well.... it's a corporate requirement that our staff get back to the table within a certain time frame to confirm the guest got everything they needed...now many times have you wanted something particular with your meal..and didn't get it...and no one came back... Good manners tho...should always be a must! We have 4 mystery shops a month and all of these things have to be done. But to the point...sweetie, honey, darlin.... is sooooo not okay!

carolynrae
April 8th, 2015, 02:20 AM
The young lady at the local Subway calls everyone Babe, Hi Babe, What can I do for you Babe? Do you want anything else on your sandwich Babe? She is very nice but it does annoy me.....really....I am a senior....I don't want to be called Babe except by my Hubs....and I am not a pig. I think this is very unprofessional.