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RockinLou
January 29th, 2015, 10:17 AM
Backstory to my vent.....

6 years ago we moved to Morocco, I loved it, my husband, not so much, I agreed to move home only if he found a job in Atlanta making X amount of money. 2 years later, he did, we moved home, and four months later he was fired. Basically for being a jerk and putting his foot in his mouth.

My son was 4 months old at the time, my daughter not yet 3. What happened next?? He spent 1 year working in Wisconsin and 1 year in Portland while the kids and I stayed in Atlanta, we were so broke that I often skipped meals and ate whatever scraps the kids left on their plates. Lots of PB sandwich crusts for my lunches for a long time. Clearly there weren't many flights home and I was a single parent for the better part of 2 years.

Mostly, I can leave it all in the past, but every once in awhile he makes a comment that sends me through the roof!!

Fast forward to today....

We have all been fighting the flu this week, we are all sick, we are all miserable. I dragged myself to work today, I needed to be there, I made it through, I saw some great presentations from my 10 year old students, and I came home exhausted. He had been home all day with our son (now 3 1/2) who has been running a fever and has a NASTY cough and very sore throat... Since I came home I have heard nothing but complaints about how clingy DS has been, and how tired DH is. Such a case of man-itis ... They are both kind of pathetic!! Yes, it's the flu, but how is it that the girls always get back on their feet first??

Anyway, After going out to the pharmacy and grocery store in sub-zero temperatures tonight, coming home (after struggling to get the car started in the cold) and putting my daughter in the bath tub, I walk into the kitchen/living room and hear DS and DH in dispute over what to watch on TV. Basically my son wants to watch Rescue Bots for the 3500th time today and my husband says 'No, I'm tired of kids shows, all I have watched all day is kids tv'

WHAT??? The kid has a fever and is sick.... All I watched for TWO YEARS was kids tv, you can't hack it for 12 hours when the kid is sick?!?

Get over yourself.

Sonic
January 29th, 2015, 10:22 AM
I can soooo sympathize with you in so many ways...
And yep, sometimes we need to vent to others who get it.
:icon_hug:

I hope you and the family recover from the flu quickly and not strangle DH in the mean time. ;)

WendyI
January 29th, 2015, 10:31 AM
Men really are a different species I swear it. I hope you all get better soon...nothing worse than the entire house being sick. So sorry your DH is being a jerk. Hope he grows up soon! ;)

RockinLou
January 29th, 2015, 10:41 AM
Thanks, ladies.

He came over to me a few minutes ago and said 'Sorry, I'm just tired of being sick' and I said 'I'm tired of everyone being sick, everyone being irritable, and everyone complaining' to which he responded 'fair enough' .... Only to proceed in being grumpy!!

The kids are 3 and 6, yes, they are being irritable and high maintenance, at least they are an age where it is forgivable. At 40, not so much bub!!

MariaNaito
January 29th, 2015, 11:00 AM
Sorry to read you haven't been having a good day/week. I notice you are in Kazakhstan/Almaty, my husband has made a few business trips there, interesting to see his photos, but ZI imagine Morocco was much more exciting! (and inspiring for quilt making-all those colors and designs...) Anyway sorry your husband is being such a Pain in the ass. Hope the kids get better soon.

shirleyknot
January 29th, 2015, 11:04 AM
I have little patience for men and their whines. I am blissfully single, and will remain so.

HandsOffItsMine
January 29th, 2015, 11:24 AM
Vent away, it's good for your soul and your blood pressure. ;)

Men are horrible when they have a cold or the flu. They can handle a major illness but Oh Hell when it's a C or F - the world comes to an end. Next time he whines...Give him a Gibb's smack up side the head! You'll feel better!

RockinLou
January 29th, 2015, 11:28 AM
I just drugged (prescriptions, I promise) the kids and got them off to sleep. Now for my round, hoping to hit the pillow before he overtakes more than half the bed.

JCY
January 29th, 2015, 11:33 AM
I hope you all feel better soon. Hang in there.

LynneLeavell
January 29th, 2015, 11:52 AM
Hope you are all feeling better soon. Nothing like a man who is sick. My husband is the same way. Actually my Adult kids are just like him. When they get sick heaven forbid them do anything. Any way much needed prayers coming your way. Good luck!

GrammaBabs
January 29th, 2015, 12:04 PM
Vent away,,, it's good for the soul,,, but I might add that when he's feeling better,, he needs to be told "somebody needs an attitude adjustment"... my DD's phrase..:)

RockinLou
January 29th, 2015, 12:12 PM
Vent away,,, it's good for the soul,,, but I might add that when he's feeling better,, he needs to be told "somebody needs an attitude adjustment"... my DD's phrase..:)

Yes, yes he does! He will, I just know it is not worth it right now when tensions are already higher.

I did make him stay up to give DD her ABX which has to be 2 hours after food. I'm going to bed, I stayed up last night, his turn!!

MayinJerset
January 29th, 2015, 12:17 PM
Hope you get a good night's sleep as you need and deserve it to cope right now.
Been there, done that and 2015 marks 60 yrs. married and he's still alive!

My DH isn't too bad I think the problem what we got was the freedom to have a full time job and still continue to do it all. Emptying the dishwasher once a week isn't equal household help.

bscuzz
January 29th, 2015, 12:35 PM
I'll throw in my 2 cents. My 1st DH was a stinker and a very I, ME, MY kind of person - EVERYONE came AFTER him. I tried for more than 20 years to stick it out till he grew up - HE NEVER DID! Sad, excruciating divorce years were just as hard. BUT the good Lord decided I'd survived the worst and led me to find my Mr. This man isn't perfect, but he has heart, loves me first and let's me know when I'm being 'severely independent' (the aftermath of 1st go), he nurses me when I'm ill, praises me as 'someone special' brags on my accomplishments, thinks I'm the World's Best Gra'ma! Some days I'm afraid he's gonna go "poof" - I couldn't do without him!

Hang in there, Rockinlou, sometimes they grow up and I sure hope for you he does - but life isn't over if he doesn't, there's always another chapter. Prayers that he sees what he has and doesn't want to loose.

rebeccas-sewing
January 29th, 2015, 01:20 PM
Men can be so annoying!!! I'm sure they same the same about us. hahaha No worries on the venting. I know for sure I've had moments where I've needed to do the same. Forum friends are very sympathetic and understanding. I'd say you definitely have some serious resentment going on toward your husband. I hope you can get it worked out. If you can manage to put it behind you it's better for your mental state. I know - easier said than done, right?

alliek
January 29th, 2015, 01:43 PM
At this point, if he brought you roses, you would only see the thorns!!! You need to get well. They do grow up,eventually. Men that is.

laura44
January 29th, 2015, 01:49 PM
Feel free to vent. I totally understand. I have a husband and two boys, they are all babies when sick.

Gina
January 29th, 2015, 01:51 PM
Hope you are all well soon! Some men just don't realize what we "Mothers" go through day to day! My hubby can usually handle about 6 hours then he is ready for a break! Motherhood, it's what makes us special and strong enough to handle just about anything! ��

Suzette
January 29th, 2015, 01:59 PM
Rant away sweetie! It's what keeps us sane in the long run! :icon_razz:

My hubby is a great guy, but man, oh man, when he is sick you would think the world was ending! Men!! That's why I feed him so well, to keep him as healthy as possible! :D

Monique
January 29th, 2015, 02:29 PM
MOST men are wusses, plain and simple. Hubby has a man cold. Told him I would call his mother.

And MOST men can't multi-task either.

Sorry Bob, Denis and Ryan and the other men here.

bubba
January 29th, 2015, 02:39 PM
You have my sympathies!!! The only thing worse than a sick husband is a whiny sick husband......oh wait, they are one and the same!!

Iris Girl
January 29th, 2015, 04:52 PM
Hang in there , you have my sympathies. I have a hubby and 2 adult male children. They are mostly good, but don't let them get sick. OR go thru change of life. That one almost killed us. But still together 31 years later and neither has killed the other...but somedays sure do feel the need to. My hubby is randomly selfish. Bad upbringing from his absentee runaround mom and alcoholic/schizo dad. Goodness most times hes ok

stationarymom
January 30th, 2015, 04:06 AM
I hope everyone feels better soon.You do know that we really are the stronger sex don't you.

RockinLou
January 30th, 2015, 08:15 AM
Thank you all for listening. The kids are on the mend, and I'm hopeful that my husband and I aren't far behind.

I went to work today and feel terrible now that I am home, my husband was here, mostly alone, and as soon as I came in he's sat me down and is feebly attempting to feed us and take care of me. He's still feeling terrible too, but at least he's stepped up this evening.

He really isn't a terrible person, and I'm sick and miserable and grumbling, I'm just selectively choosing my audience to be people we don't know face to face instead of grumbling at him. He is going to try to stop grumbling to me.

We are both laughing in tears about how pathetic we are right now, he is making toast for dinner, with scrambled eggs, and I have brought out the disposable party wear . The goal being to wash as few dishes as humanly possible this weekend. Forget the laundry too, the nanny can catch up on it next week. Thank God we have household help, or we would be wallowing in our own filth right now,... This is not like us, to be sooooo pathetically lazy!!

Our kids do not often get plugged into tv or iPads, but the next 24 hours no limits apply, Mama and Papa must get well!!

Blondie
January 30th, 2015, 08:46 AM
99738

There, there, there, dear girl. You are smart to have chosen your audience well. Nothing more comforting than a bunch of sisters and brothers who feel your pain.
One time when my ex husband was at his almost worst behavior, I wormed him. Honest to God, I wormed him. I went to the pharmacist and requested pin worm meds for the kids. The children didn't have worms, but, I told husband they did. That we all needed a dose of meds. He dutifully took it. I warned him not to drink anything because it would not be pleasant side effects. Being an avid drinker, I knew his chances were excellent. He spent the week sick as a dog, all the time swearing he had the flu. I was very consoling. Then I gave him his second dose.


99740

MRoy
January 30th, 2015, 08:57 AM
Lou, I hope you and DH are both feeling better real soon. I can assure you he's not as sick as my DH gets....no one gets as sick as he does (according to him).

If his attitude doesn't improve with his health, just follow Blondie's lead and worm him. ROFLOL!!

RockinLou
January 30th, 2015, 09:31 AM
Wow, Blondie, I'm not there yet, but I sure would know who to ask for help!! LOL!!

Oh goodness, I'm so glad that DH isn't a drinker, too many alcoholics in the bloodlines, we're a pretty dry household!

Blondie
January 30th, 2015, 09:39 AM
Fortunately, no one was seriously injured and unfortunately for ex, he never did realize and "wake up" to his asinine ways.
Glad to know that everyone is on the mend. Now if you ever need more helpful advice, I have a million of them. Like Paul Simon sang, there are 50 ways to leave your lover. I recommend the slip out the back, Jack. Or perhaps, make a new plan, Stan . . .

Sandy Navas
January 30th, 2015, 09:17 PM
99738

There, there, there, dear girl. You are smart to have chosen your audience well. Nothing more comforting than a bunch of sisters and brothers who feel your pain.
One time when my ex husband was at his almost worst behavior, I wormed him. Honest to God, I wormed him. I went to the pharmacist and requested pin worm meds for the kids. The children didn't have worms, but, I told husband they did. That we all needed a dose of meds. He dutifully took it. I warned him not to drink anything because it would not be pleasant side effects. Being an avid drinker, I knew his chances were excellent. He spent the week sick as a dog, all the time swearing he had the flu. I was very consoling. Then I gave him his second dose.


99740




It's not nice to fool with Mother Nature.

IBake
January 31st, 2015, 03:29 AM
Can you trade him for a sewing machine?

lapeoples
January 31st, 2015, 10:41 AM
Men - you just can't shoot em. Or so the song says.

RockinLou
January 31st, 2015, 10:47 AM
We dragged our sorry bums to the doctor today, we are both being treated for pneumonia. This is not for wimps....

lapeoples
January 31st, 2015, 11:15 AM
Oh no. Take care of yourselves.

Preeti
January 31st, 2015, 08:34 PM
Sending hugs and best wishes to you. Hope you feel better soon.

RockinLou
February 1st, 2015, 09:42 AM
I went to my classroom this afternoon to set up lesson plans for the next two days, when I came home he had made steak and broccoli for me, he knows this is my #1 'I need some healthy food now" meal when I get sick, I have a bleeding disorder and the high protein and iron make a big difference for me.

I guess I'm not quite ready to worm him, or turn him in for a sewing machine yet!!