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SewLiz
May 31st, 2014, 12:00 PM
I've seen a few people here say "oh I'm donating my time/money to this or that and so-and-so has the nerve to demand I do more" Or "I've made them a beautiful gift and they just threw it in the closet". Ask yourself this question: Am I doing it for them, or am I doing it for me?

Seems to me that a lot of people tend to do things for the notoriety and the pat on the back. Instead of it being just an act of kindness, it's "hey look what *I* am doing, aren't I a great person!" And if they don't get that pat on the back then all hell breaks loose.

Helping someone for the sake of helping them is what should matter more than having that person praise and thank you for it.

Kgrammiecaz
May 31st, 2014, 12:10 PM
I cannot imagine anyone here on this forum ever doing anything for the sake of being famous or to be the center of attention. We do for others because we believe they deserve it and its comforting.

Of course we feel good about it. We feel good when we know others benefit from our gift. The reward is their happiness, their smiles. And I totally dont think its wrong to expect someone along the line to at least say thank you.

That all said, if I gave a gift to a friend or family member and they treated it like crap, I would ask for it back and they would never get another thing.

So If I have answered incorrectly or misunderstood your question, please let me know.

K. McEuen
May 31st, 2014, 12:33 PM
I'll say it now - if this thread starts trouble on the forum it will be shut down.

People volunteer for many reasons, most of them good. There are those that do it for the attention and kudos they receive, possibly because they don't get them any other way.

I've donated to some groups here and not to others. I can't afford to donate to all of them, so the ones I joined first are the ones I stay with and at times those can be a bit much with postage and everything else.

I think the gift giving remarks don't really apply to volunteering or donations. Gifts are normally to people we know. Some of the people we know prove themselves to be undeserving of a gift that has taken so much time and effort to make. I'm not sure money even enters in to the picture so much as the time and effort do when they treat your gift like a $9.95 special from Walmart.

Cat n bull
May 31st, 2014, 12:38 PM
Well, I will never see the recipients of my quilts I give to Project Linus, but do occasionally read letters and thank yous from people that have received a blanket or quilt from the organization. That's enough for me.

Not the same as a gift. A gift is made for someone known.

edit:
I limit my volunteer sewing to just one organization, because of the time involved in making a quilt, and because I feel very strongly about helping the children in MY area. These are my neighbors, my grandson's peers, my community. I WANT to let the children know that someone right here really does care about them, even if they do not know them.

Learner quilter
May 31st, 2014, 12:43 PM
I also give to Project Linus UK.. I wanted to learn to quilt, I did not want quilts to lie in a cupboard, I hope they give comfort to someone, cost and thanks don't come into it..

Sylvia H
May 31st, 2014, 12:48 PM
.......

That all said, if I gave a gift to a friend or family member and they treated it like crap, I would ask for it back and they would never get another thing.
.........

I would not ask for it back, for this reason: I did not tell the recipient that the gift was given on condition that they treat it in a certain way. It would be a lesson learned for me - BUT - as you stated - I would not gift them with anything else.

Claire OneStitchAtATime
May 31st, 2014, 01:02 PM
My quilts aren't donation-level, yet. But my hand embroidery is. Friends commission me to make something they like in exchange for a donation to the charity I want to support, or I give pieces to silent auctions for the charity I want to support. Sometimes I post things on Facebook to generate commissions. I get the pleasure of crafting something, and the pleasure if it being of some use, instead of sitting in my closet. And I draw attention to the causes I care about & generate funds for them. The friends who commission are often wanting a handmade gift for someone else, so they choose the project based on his or her taste. I cover the cost of materials myself and the friend donates directly to the charity, not through me.

I like this strategy because there is a good chance that the object will go to someone who really likes it, & yet I support kids in need with my work.

The pillow in my avatar picture, for example, went to a friend's mother for her birthday when it was done, with the friend donating to Solving Kids' Cancer.

alliek
May 31st, 2014, 01:02 PM
We are all human, we all have feelings, we all have a need to be appreciated. We do things for others because most of the time it gives us pleasure, especially if it's for family or children who have a need and because we want to make things better for that person or make them smile. If our efforts are not appreciated, it hurts, however, most of us will suck it up and keep on "giving" just because...
If you have nothing to give you always have a smile, a hug, and a prayer.

bakermom
May 31st, 2014, 01:11 PM
Hmm, it think you're asking two different things here. I don't sew for charity except to donate a quilt or two to an auction my DD is involved with. I DO volunteer my time at my church and 4H. I do make quilts etc as gifts, but not for everyone I know. I'm not one of the people that thinks " Oh my neighbor's GD's best friends' sister is pregnant so i must make a quilt". I have made them for friends for their babies/grandbabies and they have been well received. On the other hand there are relatives that I would never make a quilt for simply because I know they would be "picked apart" by know-it-alls that don't know anything at all about quilts. I guess what I'm saying is , I follow my feelings. I make a gift because I want to, not because it is expected or a misguided sense of obligation. Then once it's given I let it go.
Also want to add, I volunteer because I feel we have an obligation to give back(to our community church whatever) I often get asked why I'm still involved in 4H-my kids have been out of it for years. simply it's a program I believe in, I have seen what it can do for people. I want it to be around for my GKs

Divine Daisy
May 31st, 2014, 01:17 PM
I agree with Karen.

This could cause trouble but to add my 10 pennith......

I have worked with volunteers for more than 25 years. Please note I said worked WITH volunteers. Many many people in organisations which need volunteers to function use the term.....'we will use volunteers for that'. that attitude is the path to grief. If you 'use' anyone they will feel used to not come back, if you work with people they feel valued and return and contribute again and again.

Now to the reasons for volunteering. They are many and varied and the very last on the long list is kudos. For many who feel a lack of confidence, anxiety or are simply nervous, volunteering can change all that. It allows one to gain in experience and along with that comes more confidence. To have your work acknowledged, enjoyed and appreciated changes your own perception of its worth and you feel good and able to progress further. Volunteering puts you in touch with others of a like mind, thereby reducing isolation which is a massive and stinging problem these days. Be it isolation in a physical sense when you have little or no contact with others, or isolation within your chosen interest where no one amongst your friends and family share your interest it is not a happy feeling. Volunteering can make a huge difference. Therefore volunteering is very good for your mental health.

Are these reasons for volunteering selfish? I don't think so. If what you are doing benefits yourself as well as the people your are donating your time and talents to does that make it less worth doing? definitely not. No where does it or should it say that helping others should make you miserable to be worth doing.

In a lifetime long career in law I worked with volunteers who took the time and got the training to help victims of crime. These people made a huge difference to people who had been hurt and damaged by society in one way or another. the very fact that volunteers were doing what they do on a voluntary basis means so much to victims. Just the fact that they care enough to give of themselves goes a long way to redress the hurt that someone mean or cruel has caused.

The same applies I know to charity quilts. I heard from a lady locally who had lost premmie twins. She had no idea that I was part of the Linus Project but she talked and talked about her babies and said repeatedly that she had two quilts made by strangers that had been given to her babies before they died. She felt that these quilts were all she had of the twins except memories which were to be honest painful. Those quilts mean everything to her and the strangers who cared enough to donate them had warmed and helped to heal her heart. Did I tell her I was involved in the project? no. I let her talk because that was what she needed to do. Will she find out? Undoubtedly because the reason she was talking to me was to join my quilting class so she too could make quilts for Linus.

So what is her reason for volunteering? To give back and comfort another as she received comfort. It will also make her feel better. It will help her and will help others. I don't think there is anything wrong with that.

I will get off my soapbox now, having bored you to death on one of my pet subjects. Sorry Karen, I hope this does not stir trouble.

Judy, USMC
May 31st, 2014, 01:18 PM
Wow - Hot Button Topic!

Donations are just that ... donations usually to a group or individual that has a need. Quilters will often let people know what they have done just to make others aware of the recipient organization or to let others in the group know how great an impact can be made when several people contribute what they can to a cause.

Gifts are made with time, money and love. It's just plain rude when it isn't at least acknowledged with a Thank You. Ideally, if someone isn't going to use the gift it should be given back to the maker or passed on to someone who appreciates it. Or in the case of helping someone by making a project - which then turns into an unhappy chore due to reasons/requests/demands placed on the quilter.

But when anything like that happens we need to have a safe haven to gripe about abrasive situations or thankless people ... or at least ask a question about how others would react in the same situation. We all have feelings and can be hurt by rudeness. I think this forum is meant to be supportive ... and a little venting of our frustrations along the way isn't harmful ... especially since one day we may find ourselves in a similar situation and just need to get it off our chests.

Familyjournals
May 31st, 2014, 01:22 PM
True Charity should come with no strings attached. I give because I love the way it makes ME feel. I love it most when it is in total secret. The charity that we give should be coupled with the charity that we feel towards others.

This is a great quote by a man I hold in high esteem.

“Perhaps the greatest charity comes when we are kind to each other, when we don’t judge or categorize someone else, when we simply give each other the benefit of the doubt or remain quiet. Charity is accepting someone’s differences, weaknesses, and shortcomings; having patience with someone who has let us down; or resisting the impulse to become offended when someone doesn’t handle something the way we might have hoped. Charity is refusing to take advantage of another’s weakness and being willing to forgive someone who has hurt us. Charity is expecting the best of each other”
― Marvin J. Ashton

ldnanny3
May 31st, 2014, 01:38 PM
I know exactly what you are talking about, recently participated in a quilt of valor sew day and was very disappointed when the ladies in charge were more about getting the paper to cover it than they were in what the project was all about.

Mom23
May 31st, 2014, 02:28 PM
I have made and given away many quilts. I love the feeling I get when I give away my quilts. I expect nothing in return, but I do love when I get a heart felt thank you note. I have been very blessed in my life and it just makes me feel good to give something I have made to someone else. If I am making a Linus blanket, I am praying for a stranger while I am sewing. When I make a quilt for someone I know, I am praying for that specific person. It just makes my heart feel good. I know my reward will be in Heaven!!

sewlucky
May 31st, 2014, 02:34 PM
Donors give because of the good feeling they get when they give and they want appreciation, or at the very least recognition of their gift with feedback on how the donation/gift benifitted the intended target. There are lots of new studies out there to show that. That does not mean there aren't donors who want to be anonymous, there are. It means they don't want to see their effort wasted - whether it's funds they worked hard to earn and steward or a quilt they put hours and heart and money into.

No question, matching the right gift to the right recipient is important. Make no mistake though, givers rarely give without wanting to have the good feeling inside that giving grows. Appreciation and acknowledgement of a gift is the icing on the cake, rudeness and ingratitude just creates sour feelings. I think this is pretty universal.

Terri

GuitarGramma
May 31st, 2014, 02:54 PM
I do a LOT of volunteer work (but not with quilts--yet). And one of the biggies is music ministry at my church. It's a ministry that's quite open to criticism, as in "who does she think she is / why do they sing THAT song / I really don't like guitar music at church." These things are hard to take. But I honestly feel that God is calling me to that ministry as evidenced by three things: I don't normally like to sing in front of people, no one else is volunteering for that time slot, and when I'm not active in music ministry I feel a strong internal urging that I ought to be.

So, as someone who has taken a lot of criticism for donating my time, I think it's always wise to assume that people are volunteering/donating/giving for all the right reasons. And if some of us come here for some emotional support (which I certainly have), let's make sure we give them all the support we can. This forum is made up of a lot of lovely people--men included. To quote a great man, "Be Kind, for Everyone You Meet is Fighting a Hard Battle."

mommadeb
May 31st, 2014, 03:04 PM
I too have made many Linus quilts-some baby and some for smaller children. I thought of these kids going through their medical problems and thought how cozy a quilt feels. I think I made about 8 all at once and sent them off to Minnesota, in memory of a friend of mine that died at that particular hospital. It was enough for me to know that those children had something cozy and the parents knew that people out there really do care. When I received a nice thank-you note from the Linus coordinator for that area, it brought a smile to my face and warmed my heart when she told me how much those quilts were loved by the recipients and parents.

I do it because I want to and for nothing more.

NancyJane63
May 31st, 2014, 03:11 PM
We have a group of quilters at our church that make quilts (mainly) for members who have lost loved ones. We use the clothes of the loved one and we do it because most of us know first hand the comfort a quilt made from a deceased loved one's clothes can bring. The first ones we did were for our pastor and his family when his father in law died and it has meant the world to the widow. Litlle did I know when I started this that a year later I would be receiving two quilts made from my husbands shirts. Also, little did I know that 7 years later we would still be doing this. We ask the family if they want us to do it and honestly, we've had several who didn't and that was fine. We believe that a quilt is a perfect source of comfort. I also donate to Quilts for Kids, Project Linus and Quilts of Valor. I don't know the recipients of these quilts but I have been privileged to see some soldiers get their quilts and their response was very touching. All that being said - do I do it for me or for the recipient? I guess there is some of both. I give any quilt with a loving heart and how it is received is up to the recipient and not my place to judge! God bless all of you who do donate to these very worthy causes.

Doloris
May 31st, 2014, 04:27 PM
I do my quilts for Akron Childrens Hospital because I hope it gives a child some comfort. My quilts are made for the palliative ward, similar to hospice, but with different rules. Just about all of these children are terminal. Makes me sad to think that they all will die. I have been told that some of the quilts are buried with these children and some the parents keep to remember. Whatever I am glad they are giving comfort.
I thought about quitting once, but then I got a thank you card from all the nurses in that ward and it just spurred me on to do more as I did feel appreciated. I don't need much, just a little thank you now and then. I try to donate at least 120 quilts per year (10 per month)

MayinJerset
May 31st, 2014, 04:37 PM
Donating and Gifting are 2 different things.

So many give or donate and hardly ever say a word about it but others like myself talk about it. For instance I always mention my guild's Giving Closet, Dolly quilts for Head Start kids and our Pillowcase project not because I want everyone to know how 'wonderful' I am but I try to spark interest in programs that others can carry out in their guild, church, school or scout group. We have several Groups here making quilts or other items for others and we usually keep our photos and posting there between the members. Members talk and show what they are doing as a way of encouraging the other members who may not be so confident in their quilting skills. Every once in awhile the Coordinators will post on Chit Chat or the Main quilting section trying to stir up some interest in their Group. Many times I wish I could do more but time, age, and finances come into play so, like others mentioned, I also limit myself to just a few causes.

I've been blessed with children, grandchildren and great grandchildren who are whole and healthy and I donate quilts, pillowcases, fabrics and whatever as a way to say Thank You!

I almost always post photos of my quilts, finished or as works in progress not because I need the kudos but because viewing posts and photos of others was the way I learned to expand my quilting.

Quilts as gifts are a whole other story and we each deal with it in our own way. I feel that there are some people who have to know how much we gift them so the time, labor and love we put into our quilts is lost on them. Unfortunately some of my family members are like that so I give them a check or gift card so they know exactly how much I spent on them and everyone is happy.

Juliebelle
May 31st, 2014, 05:31 PM
I donate to project Linus so I really do not know who gets most of my quilts. The ones I have made for family and friends are given in love and I do it because I want to. I have only done 3 that I was asked to make and since I am pretty shy and do not like a lot of attention, I keep it pretty low key.

auntiemern
May 31st, 2014, 11:05 PM
My first thought when I read the title of the thread did not prepare me for what was actually said. Most everyone on here knows why I do what I do. I make quilts for the PICU at Cardinal Glennon Children's Hospital in St. Louis. I have a history with them through my wonderful grandson. I have never expected kudos or recognition for making quilts for them. I started a group here after several members voiced an interest in helping with my mission. I have to be passionate about the causes I contribute time, money, or quilts to. I completely appreciate the wonderful ladies on here that send quilts to me, and I believe I have conveyed that to them. I personally feel that anyone that donates anything to any cause for the recognition, is not doing it for the right reasons, and needs to re think their reasoning.
Giving gifts is a whole different thing. I give from my heart to people I care about. Once the gift is theirs , it is theirs to do with what they want. I have no control over that.

Familyjournals
June 1st, 2014, 12:36 AM
I have continued to think about this throughout my day. I have helped run a charity that 100% of any funds collected goes directly to pay for charity care at Primary Children's Hospital in Salt Lake City. It is called the festival of trees., and I am a volunteer as we all are that run this great event. Everything about our festival is donated so we have no expenses. Why do we do it? Because we love children, we want to make a difference in our communities, the hospital has either helped our family or someone we love.... The list goes on. Not one of us is paid. There are 85 executive board members, approximately 1600 committee members, decorators, donors, etc. and we are all volunteering to help children and their families. I have been on the board since 1998 and was a decorator for years prior. What we do is a lot of work. Last year we made nearly 2million dollars to help pay medical bills for these little ones. There have been those that thought we looked like an exclusive club and have begged to help us which they soon find out that we all work hard and they can't leave fast enough. I see first hand the levels of giving and the different behaviors concerning recognition.
*those that give for a tax write off
*those that give because festival has helped them in their lives
*those that volunteer because they need service hours for school requirements
*those that volunteer because their grand baby is in the Nicu and they are grateful for the care this precious one is getting
*those whose family, church or civic group has worked together all year with a united effort on a fun or challenging project to give
There are as many different reasons as there are people. Bottom line, we need each and everyone of them to make Festival of Trees a success, so we can in turn lighten someone's load. I have story after story that would tug at your heart strings of great love and sacrifice to help those that can't help themselves. I know of amazing acts of anonymous charity...fully decorated Christmas trees plus all the presents delivered to the homeless shelter, a struggling young widow, a war veteran, a nursing home with the note signed simply, a gift a love, Friend of festival which in our lingo means anonymous. Do we liked to get thanked? Of course we do. Doesn't everyone just love a grateful person? But do we just do it so we can get the recognition? No, that's not our purpose.
This year I have left my assignment at festival of trees to go to their alumni board because of a request from my church to fulfill a assignment they have for my husband and I, which is also voluntary. In these things I find true happiness. I find if I'm unhappy I need to find someone to serve, that is my recipe for happiness.

sewlucky
June 1st, 2014, 12:43 AM
Well said. That hit what I tried to say! I too have been a fundraiser for years, as a volunteer and as a job. You hit the nail on the head.

Terri


I have continued to think about this throughout my day. I have helped run a charity that 100% of any funds collected goes directly to pay for charity care at Primary Children's Hospital in Salt Lake City. It is called the festival of trees., and I am a volunteer as we all are that run this great event. Everything about our festival is donated so we have no expenses. Why do we do it? Because we love children, we want to make a difference in our communities, the hospital has either helped our family or someone we love.... The list goes on. Not one of us is paid. There are 85 executive board members, approximately 1600 committee members, decorators, donors, etc. and we are all volunteering to help children and their families. I have been on the board since 1998 and was a decorator for years prior. What we do is a lot of work. Last year we made nearly 2million dollars to help pay medical bills for these little ones. There have been those that thought we looked like an exclusive club and have begged to help us which they soon find out that we all work hard and they can't leave fast enough. I see first hand the levels of giving and the different behaviors concerning recognition.
*those that give for a tax write off
*those that give because festival has helped them in their lives
*those that volunteer because they need service hours for school requirements
*those that volunteer because their grand baby is in the Nicu and they are grateful for the care this precious one is getting
*those whose family, church or civic group has worked together all year with a united effort on a fun or challenging project to give
There are as many different reasons as there are people. Bottom line, we need each and everyone of them to make Festival of Trees a success, so we can in turn lighten someone's load. I have story after story that would tug at your heart strings of great love and sacrifice to help those that can't help themselves. I know of amazing acts of anonymous charity...fully decorated Christmas trees plus all the presents delivered to the homeless shelter, a struggling young widow, a war veteran, a nursing home with the note signed simply, a gift a love, Friend of festival which in our lingo means anonymous. Do we liked to get thanked? Of course we do. Doesn't everyone just love a grateful person? But do we just do it so we can get the recognition? No, that's not our purpose.
This year I have left my assignment at festival of trees to go to their alumni board because of a request from my church to fulfill a assignment they have for my husband and I, which is also voluntary. In these things I find true happiness. I find if I'm unhappy I need to find someone to serve, that is my recipe for happiness.

Claire OneStitchAtATime
June 1st, 2014, 01:27 AM
I've been thinking about it too, Debbie. I'm not totally sure it matters why you give to charity or volunteer. There are so many needs out there. It's right to give to others, whatever your motivation. If you do it for pats on the back, that's OK with me. The recipients get help, and I'm thinking that's what's most important? I might change my mind about this by tomorrow, though! It's a complicated issue.

If you are giving quilts to Project Linus or a hospital, I think it is wise to accept that the parents are so overwhelmed that they cannot do everything they normally would, and writing thank you notes, or getting your kid to write them, might have to be one of the things they do not do. Having a seriously ill child is an experience that swamps even the most efficient & organized & polite people. There is so much to do for your sick kid, and if you have other kids, for them too. The most important thing has to be getting your child the best medical & emotional care you can, and keeping yourself healthy enough to continue to get your child what he or she needs. A lot of the niceties of life, even fairly basic social expectations, have to go by the wayside. And I think it's wise to accept that some of the quilts will get spattered with blood and other bodily fluids, and some will get toxic drugs & radioactive materials spilled on them, & have to be discarded because it's not safe to keep them. Some will become associated with a trauma & will not be treasured after the hospital stay. The comfort they give may be brief. Some of them, though, will become treasured possessions, that will be valued by the families for many years, and all will give some moments of warmth & color in a cold, scary, sterile place. If you're OK with that, keep sewing & giving. But if you want to be sure you are making an heirloom, giving a quilt to a very ill child that you do not know might not be the way to go.

And PS, I think those of you who make & give quilts to strangers are amazing. It's a generous thing to do, whatever your reasons.

MayinJerset
June 1st, 2014, 04:32 AM
I guess by now the member who posed the question has received many reasons why some donate their time, money, quilts and other items. I think for every single person that does it for recognition there are hundreds who do it just to help others.

Suzette
June 1st, 2014, 07:32 AM
I give to charity because I have been very blessed in my life in many ways and I just want to give back when and where I can. It makes me feel good (nothing wrong with that) and my hope and prayer is that it's making the recipient feel even better. If I get a thank you, great. It makes me feel good to know my efforts were appreciated. If I don't, then I don't. I have to look in the mirror every day and like the person I see. I can only do that if I keep in mind why I'm donating and not get too hung up on the applause and the accolades.

HdWench
June 1st, 2014, 07:55 AM
I watched Jenny so I could learn how to quilt. My goal began to help Quilts4Kids. My other passion is trapping feral cats. In both cases there are few that know who you are, what you do. My reward is knowing another feral cat will get shots, be spayed/neutered and returned to his/her colony area where some other (known or unknown to me) person or people feed them! I think doing or donating to any type of charity has to make us happy enough to sit back in silence and just do it. To me that is the defination of Charity type work no?

Like most of us need any excuse to buy more pretty fabric? :icon_heh:



:-Debbie

Cat n bull
June 1st, 2014, 11:47 AM
If you are giving quilts to Project Linus or a hospital, I think it is wise to accept that the parents are so overwhelmed that they cannot do everything they normally would, and writing thank you notes, or getting your kid to write them, might have to be one of the things they do not do. Having a seriously ill child is an experience that swamps even the most efficient & organized & polite people.


Our Project Linus chapter just celebrated giving away 15,000 blankets! I am not sure how many years that was, but still, that's a LOT of quilts and blankets.

Hospitals are only a SMALL part of the organizations donated to. There are several children's homes, (used to be called orphanages) women's shelters and homes for sexually abused children. An organization that takes in homeless families and gives each child a blanket of their own. An organization that gives a support party and very special quilt to each child that HAS TO testify in court against their sexual abuser. The police stations around here keep small blankets in their trunks and give them to traumatized children they encounter. These are still just a few.

It is not just sick children, it is traumatized children, children that have experienced horrible things no child should ever have to experience. That is why I make special quilts for them. So they know SOMEONE out there cares for them.

edit because I got sidetracked form my original thought!
I do not expect to hear from a recipient of one of my quilts, because there is no telling who will get it. I have seen the letters from the organizations, and it breaks my heart these children are suffering such awful things. I did get one email forwarded to me by our PL coordinator, from the cancer center, about how much a girl loved my quilt and she was thrilled to take it back to her country.(can't even remember which country it was). Yes that made me feel good! And no I do not feel guilty about that, not one little bit!

Familyjournals
June 1st, 2014, 01:08 PM
I just LOVE reading about things people are doing to help lift the load from others shoulders, (and helping with those feral felines need your help in my son's neighborhood). It's not to toot their own horns but give us ideas on how to best serve. There is so much good in this amazing group of quilters. Just in the past few posts from Marilyn, Terri, Suzette, Cathryn, Debbie (great name by the way) and all of the previous posts I have learned alot. We make quilts for individual beds at the children's hospital that I do the charity work for but I get so wrapped up in that I didn't know about Project Linus. I'm going to look into that. We are in this life together and if there is anyway we can be of assistance to each other, that's the road for me. I really like that thought provoking saying on the front page of the forum. "Be kind for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." There you go.

Sheena
June 2nd, 2014, 03:41 AM
I make quilts for Project Linus. I tend to use my scraps as imaginatively as I can and like to set myself the challenge of using a little bit of interesting fabric to make into a feature of a quilt.

The quilts I make for Project Linus are made because I like making quilts and secondary comes the want to help somebody. If I didn't make quilts anyway, I wouldn't be making them for PL.

So, for me, it's selfishness, not kindness that is the reason I make quilts for PL. But I hope they help people.

Altairss
June 2nd, 2014, 11:25 PM
Sorry to derail the thread but would like to know about the dolly quilts for headstart kids? I could not find information for it?

As a side note I have volunteered for years for many things from 4-H to schools and a sincere thank you is a great paycheck for me and has kept me going even when my poor heart was tired of getting stepped on. Most things I do, most will never know about but I don't mind it when people do notice lol. People do like to feel valued and sometimes when you think a person may be looking for some acknowledgement it may be they are at the end of their rope and just need a little feedback that what they are doing is worth it. I am not talking about those that always seek it but sometimes everyone needs a pickup sometimes and if the little comment from me now and again keeps others using their time to help others I will do so.

sewlucky
June 3rd, 2014, 12:01 AM
I love your honesty sheena, but don't really see your motivation as entirely selfish ;)

Terri


I make quilts for Project Linus. I tend to use my scraps as imaginatively as I can and like to set myself the challenge of using a little bit of interesting fabric to make into a feature of a quilt.

The quilts I make for Project Linus are made because I like making quilts and secondary comes the want to help somebody. If I didn't make quilts anyway, I wouldn't be making them for PL.

So, for me, it's selfishness, not kindness that is the reason I make quilts for PL. But I hope they help people.

MayinJerset
June 3rd, 2014, 12:30 AM
Altairs, The Doll quilts for Head Start kids isn't a national program, it is a project of a local seniors group. At Christmas time they used to give the Head Start kids in their town a doll or teddy wrapped in a little doll quilt made by members of my guild. This year they changed their giving time to June when the kids 'graduate' to the next level. This may be a project you may want to start in your own town.

The quilts we make are at least 20 x 20 or a bit larger. I use leftover blocks and add a few border or sew a bunch of coordinated fabric squares together and always try to make them as kid friendly as I can. I have been working on one today and will post a photo when it's finished. May in Jersey

New York Sue
June 3rd, 2014, 01:05 AM
I donate BLOOD.
I host a drive twice a year, in concert with another drive in my area....
Why?
Because there has been a couple of times, in my career, where I thought I was going to lose a Mom...

NOT on my watch!

I make sure I give back,

(MY family not excluded!.....)

Kateskloset
June 3rd, 2014, 01:47 AM
I love to make things with my hands, whether it is knitting, crocheting or sewing. I continue to make things that I do not need, so I have found a need for the very things that I love to make. It does not cost an arm and a leg to knit baby hats, and it is something I love to do, and I have found a crisis pregnancy center in my community that will take them. Yes, it makes me feel good and warms my heart to give them. I'm not ready to donate quilts as of yet...I guess when all my friends and family has one or 2 of my quilts and I have more than I need...I will continue to make them and possibly donate them. Having sold my handmade things for years, it is MUCH more pleasurable to make and give away things than to be on a deadline to get them done for someone to buy. I have found for the most part that people appreciate handmade things, most of my gift recipients do. Like the others, once I find that someone has shoved something away in a closet or put it in a yard sale...then, they won't receive another handmade gift from me!

Leah53
June 3rd, 2014, 02:07 AM
Okay, here's your thread killer. :D

I admit it, I am totally a "me" person, I like giving my crafts but I also thrive on the praise. I went to a BBQ yesterday, didn't want to go but was obligated, I was only planning on staying a short time but a couple of other women there were talking about my crafts, it was all about me so I stayed. :D

I have a sister in law, she always raves about my crafts but when I make things for her I never see them again, makes me not want to do it again but I do anyway. She so wants a quilt, I keep telling her no but she doesn't take no for an answer, I will make her one but don't really expect to see it again, so why do it, I dunno. I figure it's my own fault when I do for her and know it will never be used or seen again, after all these years I know better. I have started implementing an exchange with her, you sell two of whatever I have that you "like" and I will give you one, you want it, you earn it, that way she will have an investment in it and it will be a win/win for both of us.

I don't care if I make it or buy it, if you can't have the common decency to say thank you, the heck with you.

I have donated and volunteered my time many times over the years, mostly women's shelters, homeless shelters and soup kitchens, also had my young daughter volunteering too, she grew up to be a person who cares about others and will help anyone unlike me, the older I get the more cynical I get.

I donate to St. Jude's, March of Dimes and Muscular Dystrophy, my 4 yr old granddaughter has Muscular Atrophy, with St. Jude's the more you give the more they want which gets annoying, they get what I can afford, when I can afford it. I also do Christmas for underprivileged kids, they don't know it's me but I know they appreciate it. I tend to lend my time and resources to children, they need it the most, they're the ones who don't have control over their situation. I never want recognition or praise for volunteering or for donations (I do wish St. Jude's would save their money and stop sending me address labels) but I do for my gifts to people I know that are supposed to have manners enough to say thanks.

MayinJerset
June 3rd, 2014, 05:30 AM
LOL at Leah53 saying, " with St. Jude's the more you give the more they want which gets annoying, they get what I can afford, when I can afford it. ....(I do wish St. Jude's would save their money and stop sending me address labels)".

St. Jude isn't the only charity group who thanks you for your donation while at the same time asking you for another donation. I also wish St Jude and all the other charities would put their funds to much better use than sending me endless donation requests with little note pads or address labels as 'gifts'. Those labels go directly into our recycling box. I also have received cheap beads and key chains one from the Pope no less. Somehow I don't really think the Pope took time to actually write me a letter asking for my financial help.

buckeyequilter
June 3rd, 2014, 08:55 AM
I enjoyed reading everyone's posts.

When I give a quilt as a gift...that's exactly what it is. It is nice to get a thank you and maybe a little praise :) Before I make a quilt for someone I need to hear that they would like to have one....some people don't appreciate or want "hand made" and I'm fine with that, I can make a quilt for someone else.

I haven't actually made a charity quilt yet because I don't feel that my skills are good enough for that. I do, however, when a quilt is needed (usually here on the forum) donate some money to help with whatever is needed. Not for praise or recognition but because it's something I want to do.

I do post pictures of the quilts I'm working on and then the final quilt. I had a friend tell me this week-end I love seeing the pictures you post on Facebook of your quilts...so I guess non-quilty people like seeing them also. I love seeing what everyone is making whether it's for charity, a gift or for themselves.

Slokarma
June 3rd, 2014, 11:33 AM
All these answers are very interesting. But the more I think about it, who cares what your motives are, as long as you are giving or serving or donating. The motives are between you and your maker, but the end result is that you gave and someone else will benefit.

Sometimes I give just to offset the times I wasn't a decent human being. Karma type thing. Sometimes the cause is important to me. Sometimes to get somebody off my back. But who cares, as long as somebody is reaping the benefits?

I TRY not to judge others motives ( yeah, all right, sometimes I do) BUT if that is what is keeping me from giving / donating, than shame on me.

Altairss
June 3rd, 2014, 12:01 PM
Thank you! My friend runs a local head start and this sounds fun many of her kids are in a position to need a boost. I also found the out the coordinator for project Linus is local and I can drop off without having to ship. I was just gifted someone's stash and want to put it to work and love to help kids lol


Altairs, The Doll quilts for Head Start kids isn't a national program, it is a project of a local seniors group. At Christmas time they used to give the Head Start kids in their town a doll or teddy wrapped in a little doll quilt made by members of my guild. This year they changed their giving time to June when the kids 'graduate' to the next level. This may be a project you may want to start in your own town.

The quilts we make are at least 20 x 20 or a bit larger. I use leftover blocks and add a few border or sew a bunch of coordinated fabric squares together and always try to make them as kid friendly as I can. I have been working on one today and will post a photo when it's finished. May in Jersey

SusanNorgren
September 9th, 2014, 06:00 PM
Some people don't realize that a handmade gift doesn't mean cheap in time or money. My children on the other hand love what I make for them. My granddaughter Ella who is 4 is learning this as well. It is her mom and other grandma who give away the things I make for her, regardless of what it is. Now my son has her keep the little treasures we make at his home. For strangers, I want to make and donate quilts or a small stuffed toy to a child with cancer who lives in the community I live. I want them to know that at least one person cares. It doesn't matter if I ever get a thank you. I am giving from the heart.

MayinJerset
September 9th, 2014, 06:05 PM
Susan, You have a great heart for thinking of others as those little gifts do mean a lot especially to sick kids. Sometimes you do get a little thank you and boy that will make you feel so good.

Carrie J
September 9th, 2014, 06:21 PM
Coming from the medical field, so many times the simplest touch, or hello, can I help you, how are you today, reaps tremendous rewards. I mean, from my point of view, why I got into the medical field to begin with! I wanted to "serve". It radiates out to my crafting and music as well. Human nature being what it is, yes, you can get burned, but I learned a looooong time ago, you have no clue what that person may be going through. I give because I consider it my small part in making the world better, and hopefully touching someone that may need that special tiny grain of human compassion and love. Does it make me angry when family, friends abuse it, well sure it does, but I usually let them know really quickly what a schmuck they are............very straightforward here, as they all know! Does it make them THINK about their actions in the future, you betchya. Perhaps it will make them think and be wiser in how they handle and treat others in their lives. But it does not hinder me from giving, never! It makes my soul content and happy!

MartinaG
September 9th, 2014, 06:25 PM
I participate in my guild's community service program that donates quilts to local hospitals in the children's wards. I do not know, nor care who gets my quilts. I just hope that it makes the child's experience in the hospital a little more bearable. I also donate to the auctions at work for the foundation where I am in the needs and allocations committee. We get to determine where the moneys go (to local charitable organizations). It is a feel-good part of my job.

Sandy Navas
September 9th, 2014, 06:29 PM
There is no greater joy than to be able to give from the heart - and the people who give with no thought of personal reward are the people I cherish most of all - and they are the true movers of the world. I know of no one here who is selfish - that's why I love this forum so much.

SusanNorgren
September 9th, 2014, 06:42 PM
Thank you for replying Mayinjerset! It brought tears to my eyes. lol

My adult daughter got cancer from radiation therapy 14 years ago, it is rearing its ugly head again. She cut and donated her hair for a child with Leukemia. I figure, maybe I can in a small way help another child who needs to feel wrapped in love as my children and grandchildren have been these many years. When I sew for someone, I envision love and healing for the person who will receive the gift I am giving.

MRoy
September 9th, 2014, 09:04 PM
I make quilts to donate to babies and children. The babies are newborns born to women who are helped by the local pregnancy center. The children are young boys and girls who are seen by the Children's Advocacy Center following possible physical and/or sexual abuse. I don't know who receives the quilts and that doesn't matter to me. If just one of the quilts I make comforts a newborn infant or a scared child who has been through a forensic examination for sexual abuse, then I'm thrilled, mission accomplished, and on to the next one. I don't do it for glory, I'm only paying it forward.

TamiLee
September 10th, 2014, 12:18 PM
I too have loved hearing all the stories, and reasons behind them. I have been a director of a charity for about 10 years; we craft thru textiles. Sew and quilt, knit and crochet. Everything goes out to those in need, from preemies to the elderly. What I have found is that the charity is as much for the recipient as for the volunteers. It is a true win-win situation. Do we hear back from our donations? Mostly no. Although we do love to hear about how the things have made, and sent out, to others have been appreciated and enjoyed, those notes are few and far between.

We make because it is our craft and passion; we give out of a grateful heart. We enjoy getting together because we love the fellowship and friendship. "Charity" is another word for "Love".

When I give to someone, say a child, I always think that I would sure want someone to care and show love to one of my children, if something happened to me/us. Same way for the elderly; to give as unto one of your aging parents. I guess this could be summed up as "The Golden Rule" - give, as you would like given unto you/your child/your parent.

We are so blessed in this country, and with our skills, I do think we have an "inner responsibility" to help those in need, when it is within our power to do so... otherwise, it's just 'selfish living'. As the theme has been, to give of your heart, to help others in sometimes desperate need. When a gift can offer a physical comfort and meet a physical need, as well as an emotional comfort and encouragement. They are both essential to our well being - to everyone's well being.

To everyone to gives of their time, talent, energy and resources - "Thank You!!" :icon_tup: You have helped make the world a much better place. :icon_kiss:

Iris Girl
September 10th, 2014, 02:11 PM
I donate quilts because it makes me feel good and I know it will make someone else feel good. I love doing the childrens quilts for PICU group and blocks for Blondie's COC group. I also like making things for people it gives me a sense of accomplishment and hopefully makes someone happy.

shirleyknot
September 10th, 2014, 10:15 PM
I spent 10 years running a small horse rescue because it needed to be done and no one else would do it. I ran it on my personal property, and a great deal out of my own pocket, along with whatever donations I could scrape up or fundraisers I could get going. I did it mostly without any help, right up to just >< that close to losing my home. I would probably still be doing it if people offered a bit more than lip service to help out.