View Full Version : Teenage boys and their bedrooms

October 10th, 2013, 01:35 AM
I do not have any biological children. I have three stepsons that only visit, don't live here. I have two nephews and a niece. These 6 are my "almost children". My oldest nephew, Adam, moved in with us the beginning of July. I've been in heaven having him here, since I've always wanted to mother him. He's been an absolute godsend since my surgery, and is always willing to pitch in.

Today, I got a text from the realtor letting me know there was going to be a showing at 5:30. So DH and I got home from work, did some straightening. I went downstairs, knowing Adam had a few dishes in his room. I opened the door and just froze. Couldn't see the floor for the clothes and garbage. I found 5 glasses, three bowls, two containers, a handful of flatware, a bowl of peanutbutter and sugar (ugh!) and a container of dried cookie dough. There were chips on the floor. There was just... gunk!

When I brought the dishes upstairs, DH was stunned. Then he mentioned Adam had used DH's clippers to cut his hair and hadn't cleaned them.

I cleaned the kid's room, vacuumed, made his bed, and then left him a note, telling him how much I love him, and that he has to keep his room clean, has to clean up the clippers when he uses them, and absolutely cannot have food in his room anymore. When he got home from work, he went to his room, then came right back up to talk to me, and agreed with everything I said.

Does anyone else have a teenage boy? Are they all complete pigs?

October 10th, 2013, 01:41 AM
Well, I don't have any teenage boys, nor did I have brothers, but I had cousins! One of my cousins was left alone for a week while his parents went on vacation. I promised to help him clean up before his parents got back home and I was very seriously debating just burning the whole house down. It would have been much easier than trying to clean it...

So I would have to say YES! Boys are just downright NASTY sometimes lol

October 10th, 2013, 01:48 AM
I have 6 brothers. I get it. Slobs or neat freaks, one extreme to the other with my brothers. One of them had feet that smelled so bad he was ordered to take his shoes off outside, scrub his feet and change his sock before going near the rest of the house. He was also the only one that got two pairs of every shoe because he couldn't wear the same ones two days in a row.

My son is 9. I have already (2 yrs ago) started him with daily deodorant so that he feels weird if he doesn't have it on. He takes his shoes off and changes his socks first thing when he comes in the door and has two pairs of his favorite sneakers. I don't know if he will have stinky feet but I am trying to set those habits now in case he does. As for being neat and not a slob I have no worries, he is like his Dad. I do not have to pick up after that man anywhere besides the dining room table.

October 10th, 2013, 01:48 AM
Yes... they are. Total and complete pigs. And smelly too. I raised 3 of them, and they were all 3 like that. And yes, I taught them better than that. Fortunately, the 2 older boys married lovely, very clean and conscientious young women and those boys help their wives keep a very clean house. The third one is 18 and therefore is still a pig. So there is hope! :) It sounds like your nephew is a very kind and respectful young man. Hang in there... it does get better! :)

October 10th, 2013, 01:52 AM
I have the complete opposite with my son. He is one who likes things orderly. Long sleeve shirts together, short sleeve together. One time he had something on the floor that he was working with and I got my camera out just because there was something on his floor. That was the way he did things, but I don't think that is how most boys are. One time my husband and I were responsible for a group of boys on vacation. At one point they were to have a room inspection to make sure everything was clean. LOL, When 2 of the boys saw us coming, they threw everything in their closet. We laughed and looked the other direction. : )

October 10th, 2013, 02:01 AM
eww I grew up with 3 brothers and yes, men are Pigs -- and boys are worse!! I've got 1 neat freak brother, but 2 are slobs that make "neat piles" as they call them Everywhere! They learned that from my mother, I can't stand clutter except in my sewing room LOL sounds like he is trying so very hard, and I'm glad he agreed not to eat in his room !

With a house on the market, I know it's hard to get it in "show" ready condition with little notice too (((hug))) you are giving him a huge good influence, hang in there!

October 10th, 2013, 02:43 AM
i have a son and have been on his case to clean as well.def a slob

October 10th, 2013, 04:10 AM
HAHAHAHA *milk squirting out of my nose* my 3 boys were PIGS- 2 were step sons. my son pretends he is a clean freak but he just rakes it all off into the garbage... he is 43 now and was a single dad for 5 yrs. girls would come to his house and clean for him and the grandson.my husband sweeps all the time and pretends to be a clean freak, but - well, you get the point. As far as I know all men are the same, unless they are hair dressers :D

October 10th, 2013, 06:54 AM
Too funny...I had 2 sons and their rooms were pig stys. My Mom used to stay with them whenever we traveled and she was horrified at the site of their rooms. She would say "You were raised better than that" But with teenagers there are so many more important things to worry about that I just didn't want to fight with them about the rooms. Instead, when they moved out I just renovated the rooms.

With that being said, neither one of them keep their homes as neat as I do, but they don't live in filth either.

October 10th, 2013, 07:38 AM
My son is 15 and he keeps his room neat and tidy. Since his room is on the small side this is a blessing. However, just the other day I went into the kitchen, looked into the sink and found 6 glasses. No wonder there weren't any in the cabinet.

It's a boy thing. Just remind him that others need to use plates and glassware too :)

October 10th, 2013, 08:15 AM
My son is no longer a teen, he's 24, but YES, teen boys are pigs! I finally was so tired of the constant fighting over his room I told him I didn't care if he lived in a pig stye so the only two things he had to do was not take food or dishes into his room and to keep his door closed. It worked for both of us. When it became too gross for even him he would clean it up and start over but I didn't have to look at it so the fighting ceased.

October 10th, 2013, 08:21 AM
My boys are a little older, but one is still a complete pig and the other is neat. Dishware, trash, clothes all over the floor - it's disgusting. His bathroom is a mess too. I really don't have to see it since he lives in the basement. A few times a year I force him to clean it all up - uuggg!

October 10th, 2013, 09:15 AM
Meli........the answer to that is a great YES! Are you familiar with the Zits comic strip? When our son moved out & got a place with a few friends.......we made sure to go see his new place the very first day....................we were too scared to go after they had lived there for awhile. :D

October 10th, 2013, 09:42 AM
ROFL! He was on his own with a roommate for awhile. I went to visit (they knew I was coming.) When I got there, he, the roommate, and his girlfriend were all in the tiny kitchen, frantically trying to get it clean before I got there. I was amused. Of course, that was before he moved in.

Meli........the answer to that is a great YES! Are you familiar with the Zits comic strip? When our son moved out & got a place with a few friends.......we made sure to go see his new place the very first day....................we were too scared to go after they had lived there for awhile. :D

Sandy Navas
October 10th, 2013, 10:46 AM
Ain't no way I'm going to tell about the girls . . . you'd all think they were mis-diagnosed at birth and actually came with appendages girls don't usually have . . .

October 10th, 2013, 11:56 AM
Someone told me many years ago that Men are like Bears with Furniture, meaning the drop everything on the floor and keep going and as the mother of 3 sons I can say that is usually true.

DS#1's room wasn't too bad but his car was another story - he gave his brother and a friend a lift one day and the friend named the car The Closet as there were books, clothes, tennis equipment and of course fast food wrappers all over the back seat. DS#2 was pretty neat but didn't like his bed made - which they all were supposed to do before they left for school. Having beds made in the morning was important to me as I grew up in a railroad flat and everyone had to walk through the bedrooms to get to the other end of the house. If I made DS#2's bed he would unmake it when he got home. Needed new sheets for their beds so I only put a fitted bottom sheet on the bed and used the flat sheets to cover their blankets so if bed was unmade it didn't look too messy.

DS#3 was 8 and 10 years younger than his brothers so when they married and moved out he took over their bedrooms upstairs. Slept in one and put his dirty clothes in piles in the other one, whites, darks and mediums and he washed his own clothes, changed the sheets and bathroom towels, etc. None of them every really ate in their rooms so that wasn't a problem.

Fast forward years, DS#1 is married and his bedroom and car still look the same as they did when he lived at home.
DS#2 complains that his DW doesn't make their bed before she leaves for work. Oh, now he complains about it.
DS#3 has been staying with us the past few months and has been keeping his room OK as he is also working from home in it. He comes down every once in awhile with glasses and a few dishes and flatware as he has to stay pretty much glued to his work computer set up during the day. We will see how he does when he moves into his new home next month.

October 10th, 2013, 12:21 PM
Yes they are slobs---I have 3 boys and they all live at home---16, 20 and 23. My 23 year old has the smallest room and it's usually pretty good and only has a bowl, plate or cup now and then----however, he also has a girlfriend that helps quite a bit so I'm thinking that's a lot of the reason his room is better. Although his room used to smell quite a bit but probably because he worked at little caesars and his clothes would reak. About 3 years ago his room had this awful smell and we assumed it was the pizza thing again---my husband kept on him about cleaning it and he kept insisting he did. We finally took everything out of the room ourselves one day and cleaned top to bottom but still noticed a smell, so my husband did some investigating and we found a dead mouse in the wall....we kinda felt bad about blaming him all that time although we did say if his room was cleaner a mouse probably wouldn't have been trying so hard to get into his room. Usually if Bobby's room stinks now it's because of his 2 sugar gliders and their cage needing cleaned. I have to say that there is hope since I've seen improvement over the years in his room since he works FT as a computer tech at a hospital and also takes full time college courses online so I know there is hope for the other 2 as well.

My 16 year olds room is across the hall from our oldest son & his room is always horrible. He has the stinky feet problem, also now works at little caesars and to top it all off the cat sleeps in his room. He's not too bad with leaving plates, etc behind but I am always picking up wrappers and empty water bottles or pop cans. My husband and I was just discussing taking out the carpet in Morgan's room & putting down wood flooring like the rest of the upstairs has---this would definitely make it easier for him to keep clean.

Now, the worst is my middle son Dillon that's 20. His room is in the basement and I always know when to go to his room because when I load the dishwasher we are short on a lot of things and we are out of clean ones. There was one time a few weeks back I had only 4 plates----now I normally have 15 plates. So I go down there and numerous trips later have a full dishwasher and full sink. The worst part is scraping off the excess food and mold from everything then having to let it soak. He also always has empty bottles, wrappers and trash everywhere so you can hardly walk into his room. He also works at little caesars right now and goes to college so I can understand his time is limited but I have to tell him every day that whenever he comes upstairs just bring a few things and it wouldn't get like that!

One thing I can say and am grateful for is that ever since they were pre-teens all 3 of my boys take a shower every day....I've heard some moms say they have a hard time getting their boys to shower regularly. I'm not sure why but each of them started doing this without being told when they were young so I am thankful for that.

One question for all of you------does anyone else have to continually buy spoons? Ours come up missing all the time here with boys in the house. Sometimes I find them with the rest of the dishes but spoons are one thing that I have to purchase 4 or 5 times a year. When they were younger I understood because I would find them in the dirt where they were digging. Periodically I will have some turn up---I did find a couple outside this summer and I found a couple in the garage in coffee mugs. But for some reason we have a hard time keeping spoons...and pizza cutters....I think somehow they get thrown away. (Although I shouldnt blame the boys, I caught my husband getting ready to throw out a pizza box last month and I grabbed it first and looked inside and my pizza cutter was in there)

October 10th, 2013, 12:41 PM
Sons didn't stink during their teen years as that shower upstairs was going all the time, they even showered at high school after their sports. Grandson was here a few weeks this summer and I noticed no one but DH and I were using the downstairs bathroom and shower, just thought he was showering upstairs in the new big shower stall. Realized it wasn't so when I noticed his usually medium brown hair was getting pretty dark. Seems he would put deodorant on, wash his face, feet and hands and that was it for the day. Saw him the past weekend and he look neat and clean and hair was original shade of brown so he cleaned up for the wedding we all went to.

October 10th, 2013, 01:02 PM
I have raised six sons and four daughters. My children vary in their neatness and/or lack thereof. I love what I read in Miss Manners' column one time many years ago: "Children don't do what you expect; they do what you INspect!" The mess you had to clean up is probably due to the fact that you hadn't "paid a visit" to Adam's room since he moved in, and the mountain of trash built up over time.

That said, the really great news here is that he came back and agreed with everything you said, so you and your DH must be doing something REALLY right. Congratulations! He really sounds like a great kid; not a pig at all. A pig would have either ignored your note, or argued about how much of a fascist you are for making such (insert expletive here) unfair demands on him. Any teenager who respectfully responds to correction is a genuine treasure. I hope you enjoy him for years to come.

I would make it a practice to open his door now and again to make sure he's maintaining his area appropriately (you don't have to enter; just a quick look-see is all you'll need). Is he responsible for his own laundry? If so, you might want to make sure he also has his own hamper in his room, so he has a place other than the floor to put his dirty clothes. Also, whenever you're about to start a load of dishes, ask him if there are any in his room that he could bring up right away. Or if it's his turn to do the dishes, remind him to do a "Dish Sweep" of his room before he begins. And be sure to thank him every time he obeys the rules of the house (loading the dishwasher, taking out the trash, etc.).

~ Sally \0/

October 10th, 2013, 01:38 PM
I've got 4 sons two are teenagers aged 14 and 15. They've never been allowed to take food or drink into their rooms so that's not a problem. If (when!) their rooms get too untidy I threaten to tidy up and put everything in bin bags. That does the trick.

I have rooms that I let out and 12 men are staying in them. I clean and hoover for 9 of them and out of the 9 only 1 has an untidy room that I regularly can't hoover because of the socks, plates etc. and he's the youngest. They usually grow out of it, especially when they get a girlfriend!

October 10th, 2013, 01:50 PM
My sister gave her children (a boy and a girl) the same notice: "Kids, clean your room as I will do some thorough cleaning on Friday. Anything left on the floor will go in the trash since you obviously don't care about the item." They each got 2 reminders as Friday was fast approaching. They each did not clean their room and my sister packed up what was on the floor and threw the bag of stuff in the garbage. The children were not allowed to retrieve the bag and they did not get replacements. She started this when the children were quite young. Each child needed one more repeat of this a few years later. Other than that, the rooms are clean.

October 10th, 2013, 03:47 PM
I will add my resounding "YES" that boys are slobs. I have 4 daughters and 1 son, smack in the middle of the group. My DS has always been messy and unfortunately, even at the age of 25, I don't see any signs of things changing. When he was little, I finally caught on that after he showered, I had to smell his head to make sure I could smell shampoo. I was a little suspicious because his showers were so short. Turns out that he was jumping in the shower and getting wet but there was not any soap or shampoo involved.

His room was always been one big mess. The action figures and legos all over his bedroom floor soon became school papers and lots of dirty clothes. We never had to deal with a bad odor though because I think our nasal passages had gone into shock from all of that Axe Body Spray he used. He reeked of it and so did everything he owned. For awhile I couldn't wash our clothes in the same machine with his because then we would all smell of Axe. It makes me sneeze just thinking about it.

His mess migrated to his car once he started driving. I will never forget the time I went into his car for something and found everything but the kitchen sink. The strangest items were bottle rockets, two pairs of underwear and a big fake lobster. I don't even want to know what that was all about.

He now lives in his own apartment and things are the same. He is recycling, which is a good thing but he never takes anything to be recycled, so his kitchen is overflowing with cardboards, cans, plastic, etc. We just counted and there are 53 egg cartons piled high on his kitchen floor. My mom has sent him home with some leftovers and baked items. Well, when I saw the mold growing in the containers that had never been washed, I sent him to Walmart to buy new Rubbermaid for his grandmother.

The funny thing is if you saw him, he would be as neat as a pin, a very handsome young man, if I do say so myself. Plus, he has a heart of gold. So who knows, maybe one day he will find the woman of his dreams and she will change his messy ways. It is going to be quite a challenge though!!

PS There are days when I would be very happy to see those legos all over the floor again. It's been hard for me to get used to the fact that they are all grown up. :(

Tanya D
October 10th, 2013, 05:22 PM
I have a 17 year old who is not very tidy. His floor is covered with clothes. I also have a 13 year old girl who is actually worse. She'll have a fruit snack and leave the wrapper where ever she ate. I just lost my mind on them a couple of weeks ago that I am tired of coming home at lunch time only to spend half my lunch cleaning up their breakfast dishes and such. I mean, if you take the box of cereal out of the cupboard, Put. It. Back. It's not that hard!!!! Grrr...now I'm all riled up again.

But I recall my room was a bit of a sty when I was their age too.

Someone mentioned their kids car....Eric's car is spotless!!!! If only he could do the same with his room.

October 10th, 2013, 06:18 PM
His mess migrated to his car once he started driving. I will never forget the time I went into his car for something and found everything but the kitchen sink. The strangest items were bottle rockets, two pairs of underwear and a big fake lobster. I don't even want to know what that was all about.

Karen.......this story cracked me up..........I saw inside my son's car last week & have to admit..........I was a little frightened!! :D

May..........I think it's so funny that your DS#2 never wanted his bed made & now complains if it's not done........don't you just want to pinch them sometimes!

When our son still lived at home the big issue was........he would never turn his sweaty disgusting socks right side out when he took them off! Have you ever stuck your hand down inside the damp grubby sock of a teenage boy...........Yuuuuucccckkkkkkkk!!! It would give me the shivers! I was constantly griping to him about this until I realized.........that I was the only one getting stressed out. It didn't seem to phase him........so I changed my plan. When I washed clothes.....if his socks were not turned right side out I just left them in the dirty clothes basket & I didn't mention to him again. One day he comes to me & ask "Mom, do I have any clean socks?" I can hear all of you giggling! My answer to him was "Nope........they are all in the basket waiting to be washed. Go wash them & turn them right side out first!" He had to wash his own socks quite often. I started doing the same thing with his clothes that he would leave on the floor of his room........instead of putting them in the hamper that was an arms length away in the hall. If it wasn't in the hamper.......it did not get washed!! :D

Here is a link to just one of the many cartoons like this.

The Comic Strips - Cartoon View and Uses (http://www.thecomicstrips.com/store/add.php?iid=88745)

October 10th, 2013, 06:58 PM
His room was always been one big mess. The action figures and legos all over his bedroom floor soon became school papers and lots of dirty clothes. We never had to deal with a bad odor though because I think our nasal passages had gone into shock from all of that Axe Body Spray he used. He reeked of it and so did everything he owned. For awhile I couldn't wash our clothes in the same machine with his because then we would all smell of Axe. It makes me sneeze just thinking about it.

This made me laugh out loud! :D

October 10th, 2013, 08:09 PM
My daughter is sloppier than the boys. The boys are pretty good even though sometimes I have to ask the oldest for his dirty dishes (usually from just 1 meal.) They even vacuum their room if they know a friend is coming over. I can't get them to do anything in the rest of the house but at least I am not fighting with them about their rooms.


October 10th, 2013, 08:38 PM
Pam, My 3 sons all played sports in grammer and hish school so there were plenty of wet stinky clothes to be washed. I didn't mind washing them for the boys as I just threw the whole mess into the washing machine. Whatever way the clothes came out of the dryer was the way I put them in the boy's baskets. They were the ones who had to turn socks, undies and uniforms right side out if needed. Have to say the when the boys were in high school and college they often washed their own clothes.

For DH I will turn dry socks right side out when I put the pairs together but undies get folded whatever way they come out of the dryer. Told DH if he is so fussy about his clothes he could do all the washing, drying, folding and hanging up himself - last I heard about that from him. LOL!