View Full Version : UGLY CRY.. That is me this week, doing the UGLY CRY

Kelly F
August 29th, 2013, 12:49 AM
I am having a rough few days.. Actually as I wrote that I realized that tomorrow is Thursday. Wow, see that is the week I am having.

I have had 1 too many surprises at work this week. One surprise caught me off guard, and the pressure from the stress of the situation left me in tears. Then tears turned into an UGLY CRY. From system issues at work that disable you from finishing something by a deadline, to surprise training.

Isn't it funny how you become a star employee when a manager wants you to attend this fantastic training that you have said NO to a few times. But they convince you it is good for your résumé with the company. You take the class and within a few hours you realize you are in over your head. I was listening to the instructor. He is speaking in lingo.. For crying out loud I thought I was in an episode of the Twilight Zone. Suddenly, I don't understand what anyone is discussing. And then I was called on to "explain what you see here".

Ya know what I said...? (Lol).. I said , "Did you bring any donuts?". Well, he took my hint and dismissed us to a break. I broke out in the UGLY CRY.. Because I was so lost, who knows what he was really talking about, but I took the test for the class today and passed it.

Told the hubby about my crazy training and all about THIS and THAT, even my stupid "did you bring any donuts?" And you know what he says...? (Lol).. He said, "we'll were there donuts?". OY!

Today I also heard tragic news. A woman I have known since middle school, whom I keep up with on Facebook, was killed in a car accident. She had her daughter, her boyfriend and his kids in the car. Her daughter and his daughter both were killed as well. I know her parents, we watched each other grow up. I watched her post family pics of her kids and her boyfriend's kids together, showing they were a family unit. She was so proud of those kids. Those of you in the MD and VA area probably heard of the crash. It has been big news. A flat bed truck rear ended their car and caused a 6 car pile up. They caught the brunt of it, and the 3 in the back, wearing seatbelts, died. The 2 in the front, wearing seatbelts were airlifted out. They had just picked his 2 kids up at BWI from visiting with their Mom in FL. They were on the way to my friend who died, parent's house, to celebrate her father's birthday.

I UGLY CRIED again. But this time my worries, my stress, my problems amount to nothing. NOTHING compared to what her family is going through. Both her family and the boyfriend's family are faith based. They will get past this. For me, knowing the whole family, watching the kids grow up on Facebook, knowing that the 2 daughters were too young to die, knowing my friend who is younger than me died, reminds me so much that life is so fragile. You know this already, sometimes it has to really be felt for you wake up.

I will still be grieving for my friend, but tomorrow I am making plans. I am going to change. Things I have been putting off will be set into action. I have to stop saying "I will do it tomorrow". "I will do it next week". There may not be time. I am 39 years old and I still have plenty of time to concur my goals!! AND I AM GOING TO DO IT!!

A quick disclosure, I may continue to UGLY CRY from time to time, but it won't get in my way.

August 29th, 2013, 01:23 AM
Kudos to you for turning some tragic news about your friend and her family into giving your life a boost in the right direction. Praying for their poor families and it is OK to give yourself permission to have an UGLY CRY when needed.

August 29th, 2013, 01:27 AM
I'm so sorry to hear of your tremendous loss. I'm familiar with Ugly Cries.Usually during sad movies and I figure I just needed a "Good Cry" but more recently from stress at work. It's hard to understand why God called these young women home to be His angels. Try to think of all the good times you had growing up together. Prayers for you and the families affected.

August 29th, 2013, 01:36 AM
Kelly, it is ok to UGLY CRY. If not you will explode. You need to release and vent, and screaming or crying or roaring sometimes helps. I'm soo sorry for the loss of you friend nd her family. It is also wonderful that you saw this situation and applied it to your life to make positive changes to your life. One thing this experience will teach you, is to say "NO" and mean it. You will be able to see when you are being manipulated and stand on your decision. May God bless you and continue to comfort you and strengthen you.

Kelly F
August 29th, 2013, 02:00 AM
Kelly, it is ok to UGLY CRY. If not you will explode. You need to release and vent, and screaming or crying or roaring sometimes helps. I'm soo sorry for the loss of you friend nd her family. It is also wonderful that you saw this situation and applied it to your life to make positive changes to your life. One thing this experience will teach you, is to say "NO" and mean it. You will be able to see when you are being manipulated and stand on your decision. May God bless you and continue to comfort you and strengthen you.

Ya know you are right. Saying NO, and holding to it, is how you keep life stress free. I need to say it more!

Sew Perfect
August 29th, 2013, 02:11 AM
Kelly, I am sorry for the loss of your childhood friend and both daughters. I will be praying for their families. As for you getting in over your head, I know just what you mean. I had to laugh at the donuts question though.

August 29th, 2013, 05:40 AM
Oh my goodness Kelly - go ahead and do that ugly cry.

That horrific accident happened right around the corner from my house. It's a pretty bad spot and no one who travels that road was surprised to hear of the accident. It was just tragic. I'm so sorry for your loss, and have been praying for the families of those 2 young children and the Mom.

August 29th, 2013, 06:40 AM
Good Morning Kelly
I have been thinking of you this week, cheering you on for the training session you were at. Wow.
Days, weeks like this - you've had more than your share of stressors that make for Power Ugly Cries.

In all seriousness, you have my most heartfelt condolences on the death of your friend. And I agree with our Precious sister; life changing experiences can be totally positive and eye opening for many of life's choices.

I have missed you this week, continuing to pray for you.

August 29th, 2013, 08:42 AM
So sorry to hear about your friend and her family. It really does put all things into perspective, doesn't it?

((HUGS)) for you and I will keep you and her family in prayers.

Someone posted a beautiful song here a few days ago, but there is another one that I think is appropriate for this situation, I think I will look it up and post it.

August 29th, 2013, 08:47 AM
Kelly, I'm so sorry for the loss of your friend and for the grief something like this brings into a community. I have walked in your shoes exactly...being the one sent to seminars and having the burden of coming back to the office and explaining and training everyone on what I learned. It's stress to the max. Ugly crying is good for you...it empties you out so you can relax and function. Learning to say NO and meaning it was one of my most valuable life lessons. As long as you allow those around you to dump on you, they will be happy to do just that forever. Now is the time to take a stand and make some positive changes that will benefit you. Hugs, Barb

August 29th, 2013, 09:05 AM
Kelly, I'm so sorry for your loss but proud of you for making positive changes as a result of this tragedy. The families of your friend and her BF will be in my thoughts.

August 29th, 2013, 09:20 AM
I am so sorry to hear this bad news. What a tragic loss of life. There is a time for grief and that time is now. I'll pray that you get through it as you spend time thinking of your friend and her family. Oh, this is so sad.

August 29th, 2013, 09:21 AM
Oh, my. Yes, I did hear about this on the news. So sorry for such a tragic loss.

August 29th, 2013, 09:54 AM
Kelly: You have had the week from hell and still recognize how blessed you are. The world needs more people like you.

I had patient when I was 24 that was 96 yrs old. Little Sally walked 1/2 mile every day to buy the paper and a cup of coffee. She once asked me if I had achieved my dreams. I told her some of them. She told me to keep finding new dreams. Life is short but 96 yrs allowed her to follow her passions and make mistakes and make amends and even change careers a couple times. Live like today is your last day while planning the next 70 yrs. She also told me to carry those that can't carry themselves in times of need. That is what you are doing. Not all of us will live that long but she was right. We need to plan for it.

I am praying for you and your friends families.

August 29th, 2013, 10:04 AM
Kelly........so very sorry to hear about the loss of your friend & those children. You have been through several stressful things this week......crying helps relieve the stress. Your forum friends are here when you need to vent. Praying for you..........

August 29th, 2013, 10:20 AM
Hi, Kelly,
So sorry for your loss. Praying for all concerned. May your heavenly Father establish, strengthen, and settle your heart as you make positive changes in your life. We are all here to listen and cheer you on, but ultimately you will find that the help you need comes from God alone.
Blessings and hugs,
~ Sally \0/

August 29th, 2013, 10:27 AM
Kelly, so sorry to hear of your friends deaths. Go ahead and have your Ugly Cry. Crying is the best cleansing there is. I do it myself now and then. Sometimes I catch myself crying and I don't even know why I am crying.
Prayers for you and your friend's family.

New York Sue
August 29th, 2013, 11:08 AM
Jeez, Kelly.
So, so sad and tragic.
I'm a BIG believer in 'everything happens for a reason'. And if this accident has made you PAUSE, and REDIRECT to fulfilling your goals and dreams, and realizing the GIFT we all are given, AMEN.
And if everyone who knows this family, does the same, OUR world will be a much better place.
Thanks for the reminder, chica! ;)

August 29th, 2013, 11:21 AM
Kelly, my prayers are going out to you and the families for your loss. Good for you letting your ugly cry out, Keep your head held high and keep moving forward it is better to let it all out than keeping it inside (I'm one to talk I keep it all inside lol).
live life to your fullest and try the new things that YOU want to do not that someone else wants you to do.
I hope you have a great and peaceful week-end.

August 29th, 2013, 12:57 PM
Kelly, I am so sorry to hear all that you're going through, especially the loss of your friend and her family. May God grant you some glimpses of happiness today.

Thanks for sharing your burdens withus. We are always here for you!

August 30th, 2013, 09:25 AM
Kelly, it's Friday. And you woke up today. Any more and well.... yeah. I am so very sorry to hear of this accident. What a way to end a summer for that family---the lives that will be forever changed.

The rest? It's a holiday Monday, hoping you have the day off to regroup. Then, buck up and more on.
Yes. Easier said than done. (I got to do the saying, my parts taken care of)...

PS How did I miss you sneaking into this forum? did I welcome you? I am just south of Richmond