View Full Version : Son moving out today....

May 4th, 2013, 09:50 PM
Our son is moving out today. He is 21, almost 22. I know this is a good thing, it means we have done a good job as parents, but I am sad too. Feeling silly sitting here teary eyed. I think my husband thinks I am nuts. Know that I can share this with my buddies here on the forum.

Looking forward to making his room into my sewing room, but think I may have to call in a hazmat team to do the cleaning. It is currently in mid move and he didn't clean or organize anything before starting.... Lisa

Ginny B
May 4th, 2013, 10:54 PM
Lisa, I totally can relate and don't feel silly. Reading your post brought back the memories of when each of my boys left. Even if it is only moving across town a ways like when #1 son moved out, it was a very emotional thing to experience. {{{{{Hugs}}}}}}

Ginny B

Sandy Navas
May 4th, 2013, 10:54 PM
Sympathy hugs, thoughts and prayers with you - BTDT.

HAZMAT . . . what an idea.

May 4th, 2013, 10:57 PM
Thanks Ginny! He is our only. He is moving across town for the summer with buddies in a house. Then in the fall moving a couple of hours away to finish his degree - he is getting his associates in a couple of weeks and then transferring to a 4 year college. He says he isn't moving back, but today keeps asking what all he can leave here. Not sure where we are going to keep it all. Not in his room, since it will be the sewing room after the cleanup!

Ginny B
May 4th, 2013, 10:59 PM
LOL Yes, Lisa, sometimes they do come back for a while. Guess you need to find a bit of a corner to keep the stuff he is leaving because his room will be busy doing other things.

Ginny B

May 4th, 2013, 11:05 PM
I so relate. You feel a bit psychotic! I watched 3 go, then my oldest was back after his accident and still lives here. Now we have our two adopted and I know the day is coming way to soon that they will be on their own. That thought makes me sad at times. I do have plans for that room though. LOL

May 4th, 2013, 11:07 PM
I haven't been there yet but dread the day..(((hugs)))

May 4th, 2013, 11:33 PM
Don't feel silly!. I had a whole thread about this too and cried. It has been about three weeks now. I told you she hasn't been back to clean up. My first that moved out was two yrs younger and I still have a lot of her stuff too. I don't need a sewing room but I'm thinking of combining this stuff all into one room. Or donating it. I just hate junk!

I didn't expect for it to hurt so much, so I'm alone with the cat's now lol

It will get better. :)

May 4th, 2013, 11:37 PM
Don't feel silly!. I had a whole thread about this too and cried. It has been about three weeks now. I told you she hasn't been back to clean up. My first that moved out was two yrs younger and I still have a lot of her stuff too. I don't need a sewing room but I'm thinking of combining this stuff all into one room. Or donating it. I just hate junk!

I didn't expect for it to hurt so much, so I'm alone with the cat's now lol

It will get better. :)

I thought I was ready for this, but I guess the reality that he won't be living under our roof anymore has really sunk in tonight.

Are you still going to go get a puppy? I know your cats have not been well lately - maybe they are missing their buddy the dog? Have you been able to visit the dog? We at least are keeping the dog.... :)

May 4th, 2013, 11:50 PM
Awww, I can only imagine this day for me...I am sure I will be catatonic when mine leave....big hug!!

May 5th, 2013, 12:21 AM
I didn't get to go through that, thank goodness. DD moved out, and onto campus while I was out of town caring for my terminal MIL. She didn't bother to clean up either. I got to come home to a cluttered mess. I was glad I wasn't there or I would have been a mess. It took me til the deadline to write her dedication page for her year book. Every time I tried to write it I would cry. God made sure I didn't have to go through that emotional turmoil while already going through one with MIL. Hugs and blessing to you Lisa. We aren't crazy we are just moms.

May 5th, 2013, 12:40 AM
Kitties are better. The one still sleeps in the carrier. lol That was the dog's buddy. The other insist's on sleeping on me. I'm almost afraid to get a puppy. My last kitty ran away when one of these new one's came in. Posted pictures and no luck. .
Really loved that one. But that how cat's are.

I want to get something that won't scare these two to death. lol

May 5th, 2013, 12:46 AM
My daughter moved out and I got Blaze, then I got Karli. Just today my DD pointed out that I replaced Brenna with Blaze and Kora with Karli. Really weird and creepy to replace a B with a B and a K with a K.

So maybe it is time for a pet with the same first initial as your son?

I am sorry you are sad about your son leaving. It will get easier as time goes on. You do know I am kidding about replacing your son with a pet right?

May 5th, 2013, 12:57 AM
Lisa........I completely understand.....been there & done that! Our son moved out over a year ago! I shed some tears and kept thinking but.......but........but.......my little boy! It was very hard at first because I worry too much but after a little while you will enjoy the quiet time with your DH. And you are not weird.........dad's don't react the same way as moms! I think they just accept it as a fact of life. Remember that quilting is good therapy! Thinking of you......

May 5th, 2013, 11:47 AM
Thanks all! His room is still a disaster area and still enough stuff in it that I can't clean it and move into it. I think it is his way of keeping it "his" for a bit longer. I am ok with it. Just want to clean it good and put my cutting table up in there for now. We are keeping "his" dog - the 95 lb golden retriever, so I don't think we will get another pet. He is coming home today for a cook out - we are celebrating my birthday which was yesterday. My husband decided we would have everyone here in the midst of the move out. I have been letting him clean up the house! Instead of doing the big things that need to be done - getting all of the dog hair out of here, he has re-arranged how I keep track of my mom's bills and things! grrrr....oh well, he means well...

Gayle Russell
May 5th, 2013, 12:16 PM
I raised 4 girls-two biological and two inherited. The oldest left @ 16, came back several years later with two kids and a husband. The next one left when she was 18, came back last year with my two year old grandson and hasn't left yet. The youngest left the day after graduating from HS, married a man with 3 boys, then she had a girl and a boy-for a total of 5 kids. (I've changed my address without notifying them! Hehe). The third daughter stayed at home for a year and a half after graduation, then moved out. Since 2006 I've had maybe 6 months alone. Empty nest, nope, not here!

Gayle Russell
May 5th, 2013, 12:19 PM
I'll lend you some kids and grandkids if you get too lonely! I am looking forward to alone time!

May 5th, 2013, 12:30 PM
I am also waiting for some alone time, my oldest son is 36 and I still have my two daughters at home ages 33 and 24 and a grandson who is 2. my oldest son is married and has a family, my other son who is 28 has his own apt. so am waiting for the day when I am not a full time mom and grandma. Although my grandson is the light of my life.

May 5th, 2013, 12:49 PM
Just had to chime in here - I was home last weekend, cleaning out my old bedroom of Mom's sewing supplies so I could move back in! And I'm bringing my sewing room with me! I'm 31, and an MBA student, but have had a tough time at college (divorce), so M&D want me back home for the summer. OK by me - no more being alone.

May 5th, 2013, 01:43 PM
I can still vividly remember when my son moved out. He was 23 and just out of college.He came in one day and said a 23 year old man should not be living with his parents.It was time he got on his own. I bawled! He's 37 now , married and happy. He has never asked for anything except help with a dental bill. But he's still my baby!!!

May 5th, 2013, 01:45 PM
Hugs to you. I took it hard when my daughter left for college!!

May 6th, 2013, 11:23 AM
((((HUGS)))) Lisa. I have NO idea how you feel as my one and only son is only 10. But I DREAD the day it happens I tell you. It's going to be very tough...so I don't think you're being silly at all..I'll be a total WRECK when that day comes!

May 7th, 2013, 12:39 AM
Thanks all. We helped deliver some furniture tonight, so got to see the house they are renting. I know he is going to be fine. It is weird though that I keep choking up about it. I have actually seen him more in the last 2 days since he moved out than I did at times when he was living at home.

May 7th, 2013, 11:45 AM
Men, they just don't understand the feelings of a mother. Fathers feel a bit different about "nest leavers". I am sure you did a fabulous job as a mother and he is going to do just fine! :) I hope you will be able to enjoy your new sewing space! :)

Tanya D
May 7th, 2013, 05:32 PM
My son is 17 and has dreams of attending university in the States. He wants to get a lacrosse scholarship and all the schools he is interested in are in Pennsylvania, WV or Mass. We live in Western Canada...so he will be a long way away.

I'm trying to prepare myself for the day he goes to university. I will miss him immensely and the void in our house will be great. He brings so much humour and laughter to our home...I'm not sure how I will handle him being gone. (I'm getting teary-eyed just typing this out :) )

I hope your son comes over to visit lots!

May 7th, 2013, 05:50 PM
I remember when my eldest left England to go over to America on a 12 month visa, I cried all the way home from the Airport and probably for the next 2 weeks !!
My son moved into a flat with his girlfriend and then I was on my own and suffered what we call empty nest syndrome!
It did feel very strange for quite some time but I soon learnt to like it when the washing and ironing piles didnt need doing as often and once rooms had been cleaned they stayed that way . LOL
sending you ((hugs)) they may not be living under the same roof but they are still your child, that never changes.

May 7th, 2013, 05:52 PM
It is never easy to let go, but so necessary! We raise our babies to be strong, smart, independent people, so we just have to let them go. I once had a wise man share with me and it has helped me numerous times. If you want to keep them as kittens, or puppies, or babies, then you will never get to see what they can be as adults. I have 2 out of the house and when I think back to what I would have missed, I so agree. You do all you can to raise them the best you can, then let them go and watch them soar.....or help pick them back up and brush them off and start them again if they fall. That is not to say that you are not allowed your tears or your sadness, but please don't live there......you are allowed to move on, too! Please post pics of that new sewing room!

May 7th, 2013, 10:06 PM
Wow does that room need a good cleaning and boy does he still have a bunch of stuff here... Going to at least get my cutting table put up in there - I had to take it down when I got the long arm. In his room, I will have room for both and the long arm will get to be full size. Now, if I could just figure out how to use the long arm, I would be in business! :)