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Evilynn
March 25th, 2013, 12:15 PM
This was quite funny.

Now that the weekend is over, hubby had his normal workweek starting today again. He is an Electrician and working for a building company. That means that they have usually large projects going on where they don't need him so much to do electrics at start but a lot of building work. So he is most of the time very exhausted when he comes home after a new project started. They began to build a gymnasium at 15th this month so you see... his work is very physical at the moment.

Now, after my operation, we have his mum in our house to help me with the household and the baby. She has no job at the moment so this works. But she went home for last weekend. Since I may not lift anything heavy (meaning above 2kgs) at all I cannot take care of Janna properly, meaning that most of the real work a baby makes were to be done by Juha. So he had to go diaper change, lift her in and out of the sitter, lift her up from her belly after turning etc. .. you get the idea. He basically did everything alone. ;)

For me it was an absolutely adorable sight to see Jannas daddy taking so good care of her when he usually spends much more time at the TV or PC while I do everyday household chores and do most of the caretaking of the baby. So this time the roles were switched! At Sunday evening, after working bravely a 2 day "housewife" shift, he was not physically but mentally exhausted.

He said to me while we were enjoying Sauna together: "Love, I will be honest with you. I never expected it to be so much work to maintain a household and to take care of a baby. I honestly thought that you have plenty of free time every day and I never understood why you felt tired sometimes. But these 2 days now showed me that I really should respect your work much more. It's a lot effort and now I understand why some women complain that they don't get enough gratitude for what they do. Thank you for doing this every day for me! I love you!"

I, honestly, had to wipe a tear. It's true, he sometimes was annoyed when he came home and didn't quite understand why I felt tired or exhausted. I hope he never forgets this experience ;) and I hope that more men would try it out themselves for only 1 or 2 days to see the effort.

And yes, my hubbie is a keeper :) I hope yours is great too!

Hugs, Steffie

Jean Sewing Machine
March 25th, 2013, 12:23 PM
Wow, what a life lesson he learned! And I am so glad he shared his feelings with you about how hard the work of wife and mother is, especially with a baby in the house. How are you feeling? I hope you are feeling stronger and in less pain.

bec
March 25th, 2013, 12:25 PM
That is so sweet. I'm glad that he had that experience so he can appreciate all that you do.

WendyI
March 25th, 2013, 12:26 PM
This was quite funny.

Now that the weekend is over, hubby had his normal workweek starting today again. He is an Electrician and working for a building company. That means that they have usually large projects going on where they don't need him so much to do electrics at start but a lot of building work. So he is most of the time very exhausted when he comes home after a new project started. They began to build a gymnasium at 15th this month so you see... his work is very physical at the moment.

Now, after my operation, we have his mum in our house to help me with the household and the baby. She has no job at the moment so this works. But she went home for last weekend. Since I may not lift anything heavy (meaning above 2kgs) at all I cannot take care of Janna properly, meaning that most of the real work a baby makes were to be done by Juha. So he had to go diaper change, lift her in and out of the sitter, lift her up from her belly after turning etc. .. you get the idea. He basically did everything alone. ;)

For me it was an absolutely adorable sight to see Jannas daddy taking so good care of her when he usually spends much more time at the TV or PC while I do everyday household chores and do most of the caretaking of the baby. So this time the roles were switched! At Sunday evening, after working bravely a 2 day "housewife" shift, he was not physically but mentally exhausted.

He said to me while we were enjoying Sauna together: "Love, I will be honest with you. I never expected it to be so much work to maintain a household and to take care of a baby. I honestly thought that you have plenty of free time every day and I never understood why you felt tired sometimes. But these 2 days now showed me that I really should respect your work much more. It's a lot effort and now I understand why some women complain that they don't get enough gratitude for what they do. Thank you for doing this every day for me! I love you!"

I, honestly, had to wipe a tear. It's true, he sometimes was annoyed when he came home and didn't quite understand why I felt tired or exhausted. I hope he never forgets this experience ;) and I hope that more men would try it out themselves for only 1 or 2 days to see the effort.

And yes, my hubbie is a keeper :) I hope yours is great too!

Hugs, Steffie


Ok...that almost made me cry!! EVERY man should have to do that!! Good for him for figuring it out!

Evilynn
March 25th, 2013, 12:26 PM
Yes, Jean, thanks! I am feeling better every day, and the pain killers are slowly vanishing out of my "daily diet". Haha! Who would have thought? Also, mentally, I feel a lot better. It's just not worth worrying - no one can choose anyway. It comes as it comes and we can only try to take it as it comes. My new motto is: "If life hands you a lemon, try to make lemonade out of it" - life's so beautiful and I don't wanna waste it crying! =)

WendyI
March 25th, 2013, 12:59 PM
You have such a fantastic outlook!! So glad you are feeling better and on the mend!

Jean Sewing Machine
March 25th, 2013, 01:22 PM
Yes, Jean, thanks! I am feeling better every day, and the pain killers are slowly vanishing out of my "daily diet". Haha! Who would have thought? Also, mentally, I feel a lot better. It's just not worth worrying - no one can choose anyway. It comes as it comes and we can only try to take it as it comes. My new motto is: "If life hands you a lemon, try to make lemonade out of it" - life's so beautiful and I don't wanna waste it crying! =)you 've got the right idea. I think so many cancer patients get to this point once they get over the shock of learning they have cancer. Once you are in the treatment phase, a different kind of thinking takes over.

mom4him
March 25th, 2013, 01:33 PM
That is great! My middle son and his wife have 7 adopted children. He often lets her go for the week end and he stays and cares for the kids. It is a great wake up call for most men.

cyndiofthevortex
March 25th, 2013, 01:40 PM
That's a great story! I'm glad to hear you are on the mend. Keep getting stronger every day but continue to take it easy! It sounds like you have a really good guy.

GrammaBabs
March 25th, 2013, 01:48 PM
Wonderful and inspiring story... EVERY woman wishes that her man might truly realize the effort to be a Mom and Wife,,, adding to that the fight and determination it's take to get you thru this... You are an inspiration to us dear... I'm keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.... Bless you and your DH and little one...:)GB
Oh and while i'm on this subject... pleas know,,, ALL OF YOU here, that fighta daily battle with health issues and the like,, are a large family of people that are very close to my heart,,, and are in my thoughts daily as well...:icon_wave:

Bubby
March 25th, 2013, 02:11 PM
My husband feels the same way after having to care of our dog (and give her insulin shots twice a day) while I was sick! A baby is so much more work than a little dog. God for your Hubby!! I love it when they realize a woman's worth in the home.

Cat n bull
March 25th, 2013, 02:13 PM
Awww gee I just about had to wipe a tear too!

How WONDERFUL your husband not just appreciates what you do but he LOVES you for it.

:icon_hug:

shermur
March 25th, 2013, 02:22 PM
I think it's wonderful your husband learned an appreication for you and what you do for the family! Awesome!

alliek
March 25th, 2013, 03:01 PM
Wonderful story. I'm 70 and it took my husband until we had grandchildren to come to your DH's realization. He retired early so spent time with my sons (who are very hands on involved father's as many young men are today) and experienced what it was to care for babies and children and a home. He was amazed and told me he had no idea it took so much time and energy, and he was sorry he had not been there for me as much when our kids were young. How did you do it? he asked. You just do it, I replied, there is no guide book! That gave me, after many years, a great deal of satisfaction. Happy for you Evilynn, that he realized it early. God Bless you and your sweet family.:)

mommadeb
March 25th, 2013, 03:42 PM
That is great to hear. I too have a most wonderful and understanding and caring husband. Hope you are getting better.

ilive2craft2
March 25th, 2013, 03:48 PM
I think every dad needs to spend a day or two at home with the kids and not just during nap time and try to get housework done and food on the table and errands run, etc, etc, etc. to truly understand what it is like. I am so glad that your husband had this opportunity (although I wish it was due to a quilting retreat instead) and that he told you how much he appreciates you for what you do.

Glad to hear that you are recovering and you have a wonderful attitude. Don't try to over do it - don't want to set back the healing you have already done. Lisa

Wwena
March 25th, 2013, 04:37 PM
This is why I'm so happy times are changing! In Sweden we have a LOT of parental leave and out of the days we are alotted per child, two months are reserved for each parent, meaning that if only the one parent stays at home with the child (typically the mom) they won't get the money for the other parent's reserved days. I'm not sure how much impact this has had, but these days most fathers stay home with their kids part of the time, for which I'm really happy. We've not divided equally in our household but DH has been home for a few months with first our daughter when she was a year old and then both kids when our son was about the same age (and I went back to work). DH has known the whole time what hard and precous work it is, probably because there were days when he was given the baby the second he walked in the door with a "Take this, I'm going for a walk!!!" lol. I remember vividly how the midwife who taught our parental class talked about how this was likely to happen one time or another with every couple and that it was only normal and that actually the baby would benefit from being taken care of by the one who just stepped in the door and was calm, than the one who was, shall we say a bit tightly wound? after a day of clearing up one mess after another and not having one minute to themselves. ;) He also took more responsibility for the kids during the weekends when I was home, since he didn't get to spend as much time with the kids during the week as I did (this was mainly after I stopped breastfeeding though).

I'm so happy he appreciates you!! And that you are doing better. Good attitude FTW!!

quiltingtrish
March 25th, 2013, 05:02 PM
I'm happy to hear that you are feeling better and also that your dear husband understands and appreciates you more too.
When our kids were little, DH would give me a curious look if he came home from work and I was still in my robe. That was usually when 1 or 2 of them were sick and I just gave up putting regular clothes on after being thrown up on too many times. It didn't take him long to understand though as we were both in the Army with 1 weekend a month required. Most of the time we did different weekends. I also had to go away 2 weeks a year out of state and with no breaks for him, he was more than ready to go back to his job when I got home.

Hugs for you - hope you feel better and better every day.

shannonsaulter
March 25th, 2013, 05:12 PM
It's always good to see a DH have appreciation for his wife
And just knowing our work is WORK!!
Good for your hubby.

Tanya D
March 25th, 2013, 05:31 PM
I'm glad your hubby loves and appreciates all that you do. Woman's work is hard. We wear many hats.

Keep getting better Steffi!

Monique
March 25th, 2013, 08:12 PM
Steffie, good for him. I think most men should try and do our 'jobs' for a few days. Yup he is a keeper for sure.

SuzyQue
March 25th, 2013, 08:18 PM
He is a true keeper for telling you! I think a lot of men/husbands/fathers learn this......but never share it with their wives! What a sweetie!

Lisapc
March 25th, 2013, 08:21 PM
Now he gets it! I am so happy for you!

aliaslaceygreen
March 25th, 2013, 09:04 PM
Good for him for admitting it!!!!
Hope you are doing well!!

Sew Perfect
March 25th, 2013, 09:14 PM
Steffie, I am so very glad your husband and mother in law have been able to help you. Yes, your dear husband is a keeper. In the mean time, I hope and pray you are doing well with your health.

SallyO'Sews
March 25th, 2013, 10:29 PM
So glad for you and your hubby! You are both blessed.

Marmar
March 26th, 2013, 02:29 AM
Steffie ! Glad to hear you are feeling a little bit better, and your hubby is a keeper for sure, but most of all, you are one tough cookie ! (((Hugs))) and prayers still coming your way !!

Mar

CountryHut
March 26th, 2013, 02:35 AM
Steffie . . yep a keeper he is . . and for your hubby to share those feeling is nothing short of true love . .
- continue with those baby steps towards your recovery - take care of yourself 1st - all else will fall right into place