View Full Version : It's a sad day.....

August 20th, 2012, 01:53 AM
Let me start by telling everyone that I met my birth father about 15 years ago. Since then we had become fairly close in my opinion. My step mom called me on Thursday and told me that he had gotten pinned under a tractor and that luckily he was able to call his two nephews that had just left to come back and they dug him out. His foot was twisted all the way around and was pretty mangled. They took him by ambulance with sirens blaring the entire trip there. He made it through his surgery at around 3:30-4:00 in the morning. They had to put a metal rod in and do alot of work on the foot itself because of the severity of the damages caused. Friday he was awake and alert and talking to everyone and even telling the nurses that he didn't want to get up and walk around when they came in to get him to start moving around. He was scheduled to go home on Sunday. That didn't happen. One of my brothers called me Saturday morning with the news that he had died at around 4 or 4:30 that morning!!!! Now call me selfish if you will but I am having a hard time dealing with the fact that I won't be able to see him any more. In a way I feel like I've been cheated and wasn't given enough time with him. At least when my mother passed, we seen it coming because she had been sick for yrs with congestive heart failure. This hit from no where. I pray for the strength to make it through this. This is the ONLY picture that i am aware that exists of me and my father, well the only two......

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August 20th, 2012, 01:58 AM
Oh Tammy, I am so sorry to hear about your dad. It does seem unfair that you haven't been given more time with him, but I am glad for the time you did get. I know that does not diminish the pain. Hold him in your heart for all days and I have you in my prayers for the days ahead.


August 20th, 2012, 01:58 AM
I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my father suddenly 11 years ago. I realize it is different because I always had him in my life. Cherish the memories you have from the past 15 years with him. Again, I sincerely am sorry for your loss.

August 20th, 2012, 02:05 AM
I'm sorry to hear about your dad and I too wish you could have spent more time with him. Sending thoughts and prayers your way.

August 20th, 2012, 02:39 AM
Tammy, I'm so sorry for your loss. I have not lost a parent so I have no idea what you are going through. But to have lost a Father that you've only known for a short while and with no warning must be devastating. You are in my prayers.

Pam in Vegas

August 20th, 2012, 02:53 AM
Dear Tammy, I am very sorry for your loss of your Father and my thoughts and prayers are with you. Keep the memories of the last 15 years close to your heart over the next weeks to give you the strength to make it through. Those thoughts are what helped me with my Mom, hopefully you have some family support nearby.

Prayers and hugs, Ruby

August 20th, 2012, 06:19 AM
Tammy, my deepest condolences. I'm totally empathize with you, having just lost my mother on Christmas Day. How wonderful you were given the opportunity to get to know your dad. So many go through life never knowing their biological parents. I'm shedding tears for you and me and sharing your grief.

August 20th, 2012, 06:21 AM
Adding my deepest echoed sympathy here for you, Tammy. I think losing a loved one suddenly, unexpectedly is the most difficult pain to bear simply because it IS so sudden and unexpected. I am assuming he developed a blood clot.

I am saying prayers of peace and comfort for you and yours.


August 20th, 2012, 07:45 AM
Tammy, you have my deepest sympathies. As another who lost her mom in the past year, I know how much it hurts. May God give you comfort and peace.

Jean Sewing Machine
August 20th, 2012, 08:02 AM
I'm so sorry for your loss. You have my deepest sympathy.

Debbie MM
August 20th, 2012, 08:10 AM
My prayers are with you and your family

August 20th, 2012, 08:11 AM
Tammy I am sorry for your loss. I also lost my father suddenly. May your memories help you through this most difficult time. God bless you.

August 20th, 2012, 09:15 AM
Tammy....I'm so sorry for the loss of your Dad. Yes, your time with him was too short. He will always be a part of your heart. Treasure the memories. My prayers and hugs go out to you.

Sandy Navas
August 20th, 2012, 09:27 AM
Sometimes life deals blows that simply knock us off our feet. Get back up, Tammy, and cherish the time you did spend with him. My condolences to you, and the rest of his family.

August 20th, 2012, 10:30 AM
Hugs from here Tammy.... a sudden passing is so difficult,, but so much easier on the person themselves... that's all we have to hold on to... I watched my Dad suffer, when a DNR did not "travel" with him to a hospital...
Something that gets me thru just such times,,, is thinking positive,,, I know that seems hard now,, but you DID meet him and knew that great guy and all he was.. remember him that way and know he's "watching over you"... it gets me thru a lot of times... Hang in there... hugs Barbara

August 20th, 2012, 10:58 AM
I'm sorry for your loss. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

August 20th, 2012, 11:36 AM
Oh Tammy I am so sorry for your loss. Darn it all anyhow-and yes I can understand why you feel cheated, that is not a bit selfish.

August 20th, 2012, 11:47 AM
Tammy, I'm so sorry to hear the ews about your dad. I know what it's like to lose a dad unexpectedly. My thoughts and prayers for comfort are being sent your way.

August 20th, 2012, 12:12 PM
It is very difficult when it is not expected. You are in my prayers.

August 20th, 2012, 12:40 PM
Tammy, so sorry for your loss....I will include you and your family in my prayers...
Hugs and Blessings to you!

August 20th, 2012, 12:53 PM
I am so sorry for your loss; cherish the memories that you have; be aware that any feelings that you have are normal....don't feel guilty about whatever you are feeling...this is normal and there are several stages to grief.....sending hugs and positive thoughts and prayers your way....feel free to pm if you need to...I'm here for you

August 20th, 2012, 12:58 PM
I'm so sorry for your family's loss. You are in my prayers.

Granny Judy
August 20th, 2012, 02:54 PM
Tammy, you were so lucky to have found HIM...and have a couple of photos is even a greater gift. I was not granted that gift and never got to meet my bio father. Refused to have pictures sent to me. He always seemed to avoid any meetings the families set up. Please know I understand your pain and I'm sending lots of hugs your way. I lost my Mother 7 years ago and it still hurts - but we were exceptionally close.

August 20th, 2012, 03:46 PM
I want to thank everyone for their encouraging words. I truly feel blessed knowing that you all have such kind thoughts to share with me. thank you.

August 20th, 2012, 07:48 PM
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I understand why you feel so cheated. But try to look at the time you did have. You are in my prayers.

August 20th, 2012, 08:27 PM
Oh my dear Tammy, prayers for the loss of your Dad coming your way.

Hugs, love, and blessings for comfort and peace,
Jan G.

August 20th, 2012, 08:56 PM
So sorry for your loss - You are in my prayers too!

August 20th, 2012, 09:44 PM
Tammy, I'm so sorry for your loss. Hold the memories of the past 15 years in your heart. It's sad that you no longer have him with you, but it's good that you had that time with him to make memories.

August 20th, 2012, 10:08 PM
Oh I am so sorry.....
Bless Your Heart !!!!
I will be Praying for You !!!!

August 20th, 2012, 10:12 PM
Tammy, my heart goes out to you and your family.... sending healing hugs your way; I hope you can find peace....

August 20th, 2012, 10:28 PM
Tammy, so sorry to hear of your loss. My DH lost his father suddenly (heart attack) and it is such a shock. Hugs going out to you.

August 20th, 2012, 11:26 PM
So sorry to hear about your loss, Tammy. Yes, you have been cheated. May you get comfort in your more recent memories. Thought of doing a memory quilt?

August 21st, 2012, 05:35 AM
Losing someone so suddenly is always devastating. I lost an uncle (who may as well have been my grandfather) two days after he had surgery and my grandmother last summer 24 hours after she suffered a fall in her bathroom, so I understand all too well how much the heart aches when someone is suddenly taken from you :( I am so sorry, and I hope you can find some solace in the fact that "it's not the years in your life that count, but the life in your years". Don't be so upset about the years that you lost that you forget about the 15 years you did have :icon_hug:

August 21st, 2012, 02:53 PM
Oh, Tammy! I am SO GRATEFUL you had 15 years with your father. What a blessing! I had less than 12 with mine, and he also went with no warning. Went to bed one night and never woke up. Know that you are in my heart and prayers. You will find the strength, I promise. Hold fast to all the good memories and remember to laugh when you think of the funny ones. (HUGS)

August 22nd, 2012, 06:36 PM
So sorry to hear about your loss, Tammy. Yes, you have been cheated. May you get comfort in your more recent memories. Thought of doing a memory quilt?

I actually talked to the two oldest kids under me(I am the oldest) and told them DO NOT let his clothes go anywhere because I wanted to try and make memory lap quilts for my step mom and us kids (seven kids plus her....I think I might be busy or maybe bit off more than I can chew.). Anyway, they agree with me that that would be a great idea for his clothing for all of us.

August 23rd, 2012, 01:28 AM
Tammy, that is a wonderful idea! Are you near by your Step-Mom? Maybe she could help you and while you work, listen to her stories about Him. It will help you know him even more. And, trust me, it will help with the grief. You have known him as your Dad, now help her remember the man. We will pray for you, your step mom and all your siblings. The quilt is a wonderful, loving thing to do for yourself, and your step mom and the other kids. You will always have a tangible piece of him when ever you touch your quilt. It will bring your memories forward and give you peace, and that will touch and heal your soul. Remember, Jesus said,"In my Father's house, there are many mansions, I go before you to make a place..." He's with you. He will be with you again. For now, carry him in your heart and bless the day you met him and the days you had together. Love, Hugs, and Prayers, Jan L.