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Thread: Am I too sensitive?

  1. #21
    Suzette's Avatar Suzette is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: Am I too sensitive?

    Totally agree with KnitWitRosie - you are entitled to feel and react however you do. No one can tell you that you are wrong. And only you in this case knows how your sister usually reacts to gifts, which would be a pretty good indicator of whether this was a typical reaction for her or not.

    You did a lovely thing making this quilt for her. It was a gift of your time, effort, money and love. Some recipients simply don't get that, some do. But no one can take away the wonderful feeling you no doubt had the whole time you were making if for her.
    Courage is being scared to death, and saddling up anyway. ~John Wayne

    Quilting is my passion . . . chocolate is a close second!

  2. #22
    sewelegant is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: Am I too sensitive?

    I'd be hurt also. But I'm always being told I'm too sensitive. I don't expect gushing, but I do think it deserves more comments than are given for a $9.99 throw from Walmart! Maybe not in front of the "throw giver", but certainly in private. I often want to send a pack of thank you cards along with gifts!
    EsGrandma, Preeti, Gina and 1 others like this.

  3. #23
    Monique's Avatar Monique is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: Am I too sensitive?

    I gave my brother and brother in law quilts this year. My brother already knew what he was getting in advance and knows that I spent many hours making it for him. So he gushed over it.

    My brother in law spoke with his eyes, and I knew he loved it.

    Thank you, it's beautiful is an acknowledgement on its own, in my own opinion.
    Blessed are the children of the piecemakers for they shall inherit the quilts!

  4. #24
    Over40momma's Avatar Over40momma is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: Am I too sensitive?

    I really can understand and appreciate your feelings. Not only does alot of time, energy and imagination go into these quilts, but a whole lot of love and emotional commitment too! I am known as a 'tough cookie', but when it comes to something I have made, it is very personal. An off-hand thank-you feels very impersonal and it hurt you. For that alone, I am so sorry. One way to conquer some of these disappointments is to often remember 'the why' you made it. It was never for glorification but simply a gesture of love made tangible. That connection is what, sadly, many people just do not understand. Let the loss of that understanding be theirs and not yours.
    DeniseSm and Granny Fran like this.
    Sandy B.
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  5. #25
    Preeti's Avatar Preeti is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: Am I too sensitive?

    Quote Originally Posted by RiverMomm View Post
    There is a problem with the written word. Sometimes it just doesn't come across as the writer meant.

    "Thanks for the quilt. It's beautiful" may mean:

    "THANKS for the quilt. It's BEAUTIFUL."
    And that is why I prefer to pick up the phone and make a call. Trust me I can "sound" way more excited than I could convey by writing. On the other hand, my sister is like that too - subdued.
    One has to wonder - why are you so unhappy with the world in general? But then I guess, I am the one who is hyper all the time. As to your question, TippysMom - No, you are not being too sensitive. I would be hurt by the lukewarm response too. A word of advice - move on to the next exciting quilt or adventure!!!

  6. #26
    GrammaBabs's Avatar GrammaBabs is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: Am I too sensitive?

    I've a suggestion,,, if you have one,,,I would love to see a picture of it posted! I am a person of "many words",, (just ask my kids)... LOVE to write and do go on and on...LOL

    I'm at the age where many people enjoy my notes of thanks or encouragement... so I'm blessed...
    That being said,, I make things because I LOVE to do it and cannot imagine life without something working in my hands...I honestly do a lot of it for the enjoyment of it!!! It gives ME the feeling of pride that I CAN and DO create...
    People that have no such talent that way will NEVER get it! Even when they "gush",, they really don't get the full meaning of how much time and planning goes into our art... SOOOOOOOOOOO... if you have a picture of this quilt,,, again I would LOVE to see it and I'm sure many of us would agree!!
    Hugs, B
    "Each day well-live and Happy;
    that's all there is to Life!"

  7. #27
    MayinJerset's Avatar MayinJerset is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: Am I too sensitive?

    Funny thing is that many times I have not received a thank you or even an acknowledgement that the quilt was received. Then years later the recipient tells me or others how much they loved the quilt for them or their child and that it was well used. Would have been nice to know something when the quilt was given but that's the way things go nowadays. Anyway, my urge to quilt is stronger than my need for thanks so I keep making quilts.
    Preeti and Snip Snip like this.

  8. #28
    Meghan Plamondon's Avatar Meghan Plamondon is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: Am I too sensitive?

    Lesson learned. I did weaving a long time before I started quilting and had the same things happen. Now, my little trick is to mention my weaving or quilting when I am around folks who will be receiving a future surprise from me: something like how long I have been working on a tablecloth,etc. this way they get an idea in advance how many hours goes into my work. I might give them a hand woven dish towel first to see what they think before I make them a full tablecloth. I can quickly get a feel for which folks really appreciate hand made things. The others I buy a gift for. I know they wont appreciate what I might make them, and would probably like something from a store just as well. They are happy, and I save myself time and trouble,lol. Just my little way.
    Juliet Taylor likes this.

  9. #29
    IBake is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: Am I too sensitive?

    I spent my time up at the cabin last year making three baby quilts for our-almost-other-son's first child, plus two other close family friends. Now I had oh-about a gazillion other quilts planned, but let my family guilt get ahead of the game. These were not a small quilts, and they could probably use them for floor rugs! Mailed two from International Falls MN, and hand passed the third to my DIL to give. What did I hear? Zip, Nada, nixs. Even two words via e mail would be nice. I know that I shouldn't let it get to me, but I get better response from my 7 yr old GS and his rag quilt that he drags with him around the house...

    Manners are such a simple thing to use and my children were taught that. Must be part of a dying breed. At least I have some quilting friends that appreciate the little packs of fabric and such that I get them.

    I am tempted to enclose a card that is pre addressed and stamped. Did you receive quilt? Y or N. Did you like said item ? Y or N? s i g h........and no, you are not too sensitive....Kaffe? send it on to me. I will drool over it and grovel for more!
    Last edited by IBake; January 12th, 2015 at 03:19 PM.
    pcbatiks and Juliet Taylor like this.
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  10. #30
    traildancer is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: Am I too sensitive?

    In 2013 I made a McKenna Ryan panel from True Nature for my husband for Christmas. He opened it and said thanks. Not a whole lot more. Other people I showed it to raved (they were female). He/we hung it above and behind the tv and wood stove. In April I told him I was taking it down to enter it in the quilt show. His response? "What am I going to look at now?" That told me how much he really likes it.

    At first my feelings were hurt because I felt he didn't acknowledge all the work. Now I understand that he just isn't as demonstrative as I am.

    You aren't too sensitive. You are the way you are. So accept that and make another quilt!
    Juliet Taylor likes this.
    The trail is the thing----Louis L'Amour

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