Help! My daughter wants my sewing machine!

When I started quilting again, my daughter was amused and happy I had a hobby in my retirement. Then she wanted to make her boyfriend (who is now her husband) a quilt for Christmas. I gave her a few easy patterns to choose from and we went shopping for fabric. She did a really great job too. It was a four patch with sashing and cornerstones, so lots of matching seams, but she handled it well.

Now she's in California and we're talking about our plans for the next visit in the spring. She's coming home and wants me to teach her more sewing and .... "maybe I'll take your old machine" It seems she's seeing other friends who have made their curtains, some cute dresses, a quilt for a baby, etc and she wants to do it as well. So she'll have others to help her when she gets home, that's good.

I'm happy but I'm sad. What to do?!?!?!

I'm happy because she's wanting to sew/quilt. But I'm in a quandry too.

It's not that she assumed I'd just give her my machine. She knows I will; we're just that kind of family. It's that I don't know if I am ready to part with it. I love that machine. Or should I buy her a new one? Wait. If I am buying a new machine, maybe I should give her my old machine and buy me a new machine!

Either way, someone is getting a new machine. lol

hmmm, off to search craigslist......

Decisions, Decisions. I still have the first used sewing machine I bought back in 1983. It is a 1960 Singer Clone called a Capitol. It has built in button-hole and zig-zag stitches, but it weighs 12 tons. I can barely lift it anymore. But it sews like a new machine.

I guess it depends - if the machine she is eyeing is one you don't want to part with, then buy her an inexpensive starter machine... seriously, what if she decides she's not really into it after making a few things... :)

I was in this dilemma too. I got together with my other two daughters and we bought her a new machine, one she had sort of talked about. She loves it, although she is not quilting but loves to find things to make.

Thats a tough decision to make.

If you don't want to part with your machine, don't! Your dau. should not assume you will give it to her. IMO, if she really wants to sew, let her buy her own machine.

I'm going to say no. I have a dd that i bought two good ued machines for. But she feels intitled to my things. She wanted to go through my Christmas ornaments, /these are not just off the shelf glitter balls, they were handmade collected treasures from unique shops. Then when the last member of my family passed it was like can I have that. I didn't get through what I was going through and she was being a brat. What I don't get something? You din't even know my grandmother.

sorry that was a vent. I'm a really generous person, but I have one kid that doesn't appriciate me.

Your daughter is on her own, she can buy a machine.

I don't think I would give my daughter mine, or buy her a new one...maybe...but not an expensive one. But then I don't have to worry about her wanting my sewing stuff. It is my 7 yr old GD that has her eye on all of it...she has already claimed it in case of my demise.

I see you have three machines - if there is one that you don't use regularly, perhaps she could start with that!

Or you could give her a gift certificate to her local dealer that she could use to apply toward the purchase of a new machine. Her husband may even go in so the amount is higher, closer to the price of a machine.

Or...better yet, if you've been eyeing a new machine, give her one of your old machines and spend the money on a machine for yourself! That's what I would do.

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Originally Posted by snippet

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...... She's coming home and wants me to teach her more sewing and .... "maybe I'll take your old machine" .......

I'm happy but I'm sad. What to do?!?!?!

I'm happy because she's wanting to sew/quilt. But I'm in a quandry too.

It's not that she assumed I'd just give her my machine. She knows I will; we're just that kind of family. It's that I don't know if I am ready to part with it. I love that machine. Or should I buy her a new one? Wait. If I am buying a new machine, maybe I should give her my old machine and buy me a new machine!

Either way, someone is getting a new machine. lol

hmmm, off to search craigslist......

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We are that kind of family, too. However, I have had to rein in that type of generosity because of financial reasons. Quilting and sewing is more than just using a machine to "make" things. We put our heart and soul into what we are making. Because of this, you need to think long and hard about whether or not this is the time to pass your machine on to another.

As for buying another machine, I think that a starter machine for your daughter would be less expensive than a new machine for yourself. But with such generosity as a standard in your family, I am sure you will finally know the best way to handle this situation. (And isn't it great to have a daughter that shares your passion?)

Logistically speaking, it is difficult to travel with a sewing machine. If she is flying, I would search Craigslist for machines in her area, and recommend them, or if you want to send her a new machine, do some research on a good starter machine for her. It will work out.

We're that kind of family too, and I about passed out when my mother tried to claim my old machine when she retired! Yes, she bought it for me 15 years ago, and I have since added to the collection, but my daughter sews on that machine now, and. I don't want to part with it!! My sisters bought my mom a machine for her birthday, so I'm in the clear!!

I just thought you might appreciate that the same thing happened to me in reverse!!

We have a similar tradition, we call it potlatch. Perhaps you could offer to give her a few sewing lessons with a new machine?
Make something together? Then it becomes an unforgettable gift (and might be appreciated more?

I did that, got myself a new machine and gave my 70's one to my son and DIL. I wish I had kept mine and got them the new one. They still have my machine and I have gotten rid of the new one I bought [it was a piece of junk].
I would get her a new or almost new machine and keep the older one you love if you love it.

I'm thinking a nice starter Brother machine from Amazon (say... around $90 - seriously) shipped to her home would make a nice Christmas present ;)
Sewing machines are like purses - I don't even try to buy one for someone else - everyone knows what they want in a purse/machine and it's a personal thing... she can upgrade later on her own - she's a big girl.

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Originally Posted by snippet

When I started quilting again, my daughter was amused and happy I had a hobby in my retirement. Then she wanted to make her boyfriend (who is now her husband) a quilt for Christmas. I gave her a few easy patterns to choose from and we went shopping for fabric. She did a really great job too. It was a four patch with sashing and cornerstones, so lots of matching seams, but she handled it well.

Now she's in California and we're talking about our plans for the next visit in the spring. She's coming home and wants me to teach her more sewing and .... "maybe I'll take your old machine" It seems she's seeing other friends who have made their curtains, some cute dresses, a quilt for a baby, etc and she wants to do it as well. So she'll have others to help her when she gets home, that's good.

I'm happy but I'm sad. What to do?!?!?!

I'm happy because she's wanting to sew/quilt. But I'm in a quandry too.

It's not that she assumed I'd just give her my machine. She knows I will; we're just that kind of family. It's that I don't know if I am ready to part with it. I love that machine. Or should I buy her a new one? Wait. If I am buying a new machine, maybe I should give her my old machine and buy me a new machine!

Either way, someone is getting a new machine. lol

hmmm, off to search craigslist......

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If you love your old machine...keep it! If possible maybe you can make a new (or gently used) machine her Christmas present.

She's married so I think she needs to buy her own machine. I'd encourage you to talk to her about your machine and your likes/dislikes with it. Shopping for her own machine would be a great learning experience for her and allow her to get something that fits her life.

Talk to her husband. maybe the two of you can join together to get her a starter machine. I did that with my DS when his wife wanted a machine. It was a joint gift. You can find machines at WM, Amazon etc that have nice features and won't break the bank

Conspire with her husband! Great deals on Amazon for really great machines that would fit the bill. Tell her you'll have to think about her request (stall,lol!), and you and her hubby can surprise her on Christmas morning! I would have a very hard time just yielding one of my machines as I worked very hard for them. . Each person has very specific desires, much like (sorry for the over simplification) shoes, purses, perfume, etc. Then she can determine, save, plan for her next new and improved, specific to her machine. :)!

As I'm growing older I find I'm not quite as sentimental about certain things the way I was in the past. In terms of sewing machines, there are so many fantastic non-computerized machines on the market these days at really reasonable prices that passing on an old machine to someone else wouldn't be a problem for me. The features that many of the low-end models have on them now make it very desirable to just get a new machine. I understand folks collecting the old featherweight machines from the past but honestly I don't think in fifty years we'll be looking at today's machines as antiquities worth keeping. One never knows though, but somehow I doubt I'll be feeling sentimental about the machines currently in my sewing room. This, however, is coming from me, a gal who is desparate to downsize. My blood pressure rises every time I look at all the stuff being stored in our attic. I've managed about ten trips to charity and it's barely made a dent. I guess once the kids clear out and my husband does some house cleaning up there things will seem more manageable. That's one good thing about moving once in a while. It sure does help keep the baggage down. My advice is to give your daughter the machine and buy yourself a new one. I'm selfish that way. Why would I give my kid a better machine than I'm using?

I think it is wonderful that another generation wants to sew! That is something in this day & age. I'm sure you are happy that your daughter likes to sew. If you decide not to give her your machine I am sure you will help her find something that will suit her.

If you really want to keep your old machine maybe you take her window shopping to show her what other options are out there - with and without the bells and whistles. Then when she decides how 'much' machine she wants, you can get her started with a gift basket of newbie goodies (fabric, threads, scissors, rotary cutter etc.)