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Thread: Group swaps, and such....

  1. #11
    Sandy Navas's Avatar Sandy Navas is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: Group swaps, and such....

    Just don't be a:


    Okay, here's my take: If this happens to me I'm gonna bombard the swap partner with notes until I hear back and get a response . . . so watch out. Oh, and if I inadvertently miss telling someone I've received their wonderful and thoughtful giftie, please let me know!!
    Be warned. I am BORED.
    This could be dangerous.

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  2. #12
    Sew Perfect's Avatar Sew Perfect is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: Group swaps, and such....

    I am glad this thread was started. It is rude to not acknowledge a swap buddy when receiving what they've been given. I try to put effort in the things I make because I want my partner to be happy. I also look forward to seeing what everyone gets.

    I didn't get anything in my last swap, the R, W, &B dresden table topper. Had I known I wasn't receiving one for the 4th of July from my buddy I would have made one for myself. Our wonderful leader sent me a pm the other day, telling me she would make one for me. I tried not to complain, though I showed my disappointment in my buddy. Although, I appreciated what our leader is doing for me, I did not and do not expect her or others to pick up the slack for another. It just isn't fare.

    I do hope my partner is okay. I have wondered if something happened to cause her to "drop out".
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  3. #13
    shannonsaulter's Avatar shannonsaulter is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: Group swaps, and such....

    That's why I pulled back and didn't join to many was afraid of getting overwhelmed.
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  4. #14
    Madeforyouinma11's Avatar Madeforyouinma11 is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: Group swaps, and such....

    I try to always abide by the rules of the swap so my buddy doesn't have to wait, and I always say thank you for what I get in return. I also try to post a pic. I feel that is the right thing to do and it really only takes a couple minutes to do. I'm sure there will always be those that don't feel the same, but I like to make people smile, not hurt their feelings. I can only imagine how difficult it is to be a swap leader and thank all of them for the work they do.

  5. #15
    Musical_Starling's Avatar Musical_Starling is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: Group swaps, and such....

    Just to clarify my comments, I contact EVERY member (multiple times!) and give them chances to let me know they're still in before I give them the boot. But if it's the day of the group closing and I've been nagging you for two weeks with no response, then I'm not including you in the swap. And I would never post their name openly on the forum, I send PMs to other leaders of groups they're a part of to let them know someone dropped out on me so they can contact this person and see if they're still willing to participate in their particular swap as well. I'm not going to sit idly by while this person disappoints multiple members because "Oh well, my swap was taken care of." If you're going to flake out on me, I'm not going to allow you to do it to someone else, THAT was my point.

    I don't mind having people say "I'm sorry, I joined the group but something happened, I have to drop out/I'm going to be late" that's COMPLETELY fine! But please, please, PLEASE let your group leader know if this happens ASAP!
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  6. #16
    quiltingtrish's Avatar quiltingtrish is online now Senior Member
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    Default Re: Group swaps, and such....

    I agree with all of you. I don't join swaps cause I can never think of what pattern to make, which fabrics to use - etc. until the day before it's due to be mailed. (You should see me at Christmas time! I have to get all my store bought shopping done early because I am too busy sewing up a storm right before the holidays to go out to the stores). So, therefore, I enjoy seeing the photos of what others have done. And, it is no fair for someone to drop off the face of the earth and still get something in return.

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  7. #17
    EnumclawGramma's Avatar EnumclawGramma is online now Senior Member
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    Default Re: Group swaps, and such....

    Good thread, and it appears much needed. I find flakes on Ebay from time to time. As a seller and a buyer. Here is what I do:

    After one week of no communication I will send a message saying, I know things get busy but I am waiting and I have heard nothing from you. Please advise.
    Week two: 2nd notice. I know life gets busy .... blah blah blah
    Week three: 3rd and final notice. I know life gets busy and blah blah blah.....

    Note that you have sent them 3 messages, that gives them a chance to say "oops, sorry! Meant to reply but forgot".

    Works for me everytime!
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  8. Thanks Cathy F thanked for this post
  9. #18
    K. McEuen's Avatar K. McEuen is online now Moderator
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    Default Re: Group swaps, and such....

    Quote Originally Posted by Musical_Starling View Post
    I don't mind having people say "I'm sorry, I joined the group but something happened, I have to drop out/I'm going to be late" that's COMPLETELY fine! But please, please, PLEASE let your group leader know if this happens ASAP!
    My point exactly in saying it takes all of 2 minutes to log on and say "I can't finish or I forgot or I'm overwhelmed or my foot fell off or SOMETHING or even to have someone log on for you and say "She's sick." but to just say nothing or do nothing is inexcusable. Even if you do it 15 minutes before names are drawn, it's still ok, just do it.

    Quote Originally Posted by EnumclawGramma View Post
    Good thread, and it appears much needed. I find flakes on Ebay from time to time. As a seller and a buyer. Here is what I do:

    After one week of no communication I will send a message saying, I know things get busy but I am waiting and I have heard nothing from you. Please advise.
    Week two: 2nd notice. I know life gets busy .... blah blah blah
    Week three: 3rd and final notice. I know life gets busy and blah blah blah.....

    Note that you have sent them 3 messages, that gives them a chance to say "oops, sorry! Meant to reply but forgot".

    Works for me everytime!
    Bless you Libby. Three chances is more than generous. I guess I am of the mind that we are all adults and as such we should be responsible. I hate having to remind people over and over about something they already know. I used to run into it at work and it annoyed me. Haha, probably a good thing I don't sign up as a swap leader. I guess it just really irritates me when adults can't accept responsibility for their own actions.
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  10. #19
    Fabriclovr's Avatar Fabriclovr is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: Group swaps, and such....

    I agree, this is a very good thread. As the Swap Mom for my fabric and new quilter block swaps, I do keep a list and have since the beginning. It not only tells me what your address is (if you forget to send a return label) but it also tells me who has been naughty and who I will be removing from any future swaps.

    I request that the players send me their name and address and in return, I then send mine. This does two things, it tells me that they have taken the time to read my welcome message and that they are serious about swapping. Do I get 100% participation after all of this, most of the time. Do my ladies communicate with me, yes they do! Unforeseen problems do arise in everyone's life, but when you don't respond to several emails, I start to wonder.

    I do go and check the players page and it will tell me the last time they were on the forum doing anything. I had a person in my last swap sign up with two different screen names, I questioned this and was told that they wanted twice the fabric. I reluctantly said OK, and let her do this. I have had previous issues with this person, but figured that I had great communication, so I had nothing to worry about. Come swap time was another story. It was 2 days before the deadline that I started sending messages, as I do with everyone who's package I have not received, and got no response. Finally I got a response telling me that she was on her way to the post office. To this day, I have not received her package and she has not been on the forum since.

    Not only was this rude and inconsiderate to the other players, who sent in extra fabric for her, but it was not fair to the other players because I held the swap waiting for her package. I always return any unused packets to the original swapper, but this was unacceptable at best.

    I appreciate the messages from other swap moms and they have been very helpful. I have and will continue to remove players that do not respond to me. I look at it this way, if your not serious, why are you signing up to play? You have to know that the amount of fabric that you will be committing to is anywhere from 1 to 4 yards depending on the number of players that have signed up.

    I know that the mystery quilt that I am hosting right now, I have 89 members. I know that a good number of those players have no intention of every putting this quilt together, they are just there for a freebie, but I do know a number of them will put it together.

    Bottom line is this, if you sign up, please honor your commitment. It is a lot of work for the hostess, especially the way I do it, because everyone sends their swaps to me, I have to open and then redistribute the fabrics, put them all back in the envelopes and then go to the post office.

    Everyone in this group accountable to the group, not me. Everyone is accountable to their swap partner, not the swap mom. If a person signs up in good faith and then doesn't send their promised item, then the next person in line is out of luck. They get burned, so to speak, because they sent their item and get nothing in return and it gives a bad name to swapping and no one wants to participate because no one wants to get burned. Does that make since?

    I would hope that everyone would post thank-yous for the fabrics or blocks, but it rarely happens from everyone, just a small percentage, that is rude not to say thank you.. but I am old school and was taught to say please and thank you even if I didn't like what I got or I would get a whopping!

    This is just my 2 cents
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  11. #20
    Jean Sewing Machine's Avatar Jean Sewing Machine is offline Senior Member
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    Default Re: Group swaps, and such....

    Swaps scare me. Who knows what life will dish out in the months between making the commiment and fulfilling it? I hate the pressure to perform at a certain level and be finished at a certain time. They just don't seem like they would be enjoyable for me. I support you all in what you do, but I won't be a participant in a swap. I'll donate to a group cause, I can commit to that, but I would hate to disappoint another forum member by not sending something, or sending something my partner doesn't like. Just sayin....
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