I've not been having a very good week. It actually started when my deputies wife asked me to make the things for the wedding. I did and delivered them to her boyfriend. I have not heard a word from either her or the bride and that in itself is upsetting enough.
As you know, my deputy was killed in the line of duty, six years ago this December. He was a very good friend of mine. When it happened, it put me into a deep depression and for a few years, that would return around the anniversary of his death. Well, at his daughters reception, deputies showed up as a surprise, in uniform, to dance with her during the father/daughter dance. I was so very proud of them for doing that for her! I posted the pictures of it here earlier this week. Yesterday morning, there was a new video posted and this one included the song being played in the background. It showed the entire dance, and like a fool, I sat here and watched it. The song was so much like her dad that it put me over the edge.
I went upstairs to distract myself by sewing. That was a bad thing to do. The entire project is now staring at me from the waste basket....taunting me. I have never done that before. It's lucky I did not murder it with my scissors or seam ripper first. Walter also started acting up. It sounded like grating sounds of metal on metal and was very scary. I took it as a sign I was not supposed to be sewing.
About this time I got a message from the gal who was going to cut my hair yesterday afternoon. Her and her kids had just got back from the doctor and they all have strep throat!!! Why was Monday happening on Friday? So I called another gal who has cut my hair in the past, but she is on vacation till next week. My reunion is TONIGHT!!! I went to the shop she works at so somebody else could cut it in her place.
I know only two of you face to face, but when I tell you I rarely ever cry hysterically, it is the truth. I sat in her chair and I knew it was going to happen. She started talking to me about my hair and asking what I wanted done and I looked at her and said 'I just want my hair cut....I don't care'. That is when it happened. Thank goodness there was nobody in the shop but me and the two haircutters and they didn't know what to do. They had never seen me before. I am surprised they didn't call the ambulance to take me to the funny farm. After about ten minutes of hysterics, I finally got myself calmed down, she cut my hair and I flew out of there as fast as I could!
I went to the mall to buy something to wear tonight. Other than a tshirt, I have not bought a stitch of clothes since I retired...oh, I did buy a pack of socks! What I had in my head and what they had to offer did not mesh and I ended up buying a cute top and a pair of black jeans. I even bought a dress to wear when we go to Hawaii. The only reason I bought black jeans was because MM told me he was wearing black jeans.....truthfully, I'd at least of worn dress pants.
He gets up from sleeping after I get back home and one look at me and he knew something was wrong. I told him what happened and I know he felt bad for me, but he didn't know what to do. I think he was thinking, please don't make us go thru this again!!! He sat with me awhile then got up and fixed dinner. After that, I went and took a nice long bath (we have a clawfoot tub and I love to soak in it and read books), but that didn't improve my mood. Came back downstairs, watched some TV and finally straggled to bed only to lie there awake for hours. It felt like I finally fell asleep when he must have thought it was time for me to be awake.............
So here I sit, still in a foul mood. Tyler is over and I got a nice big hug and talked to him a little. He has grown into a great young man.
I have to do the buttonholes/buttons on MM's shirt so he can wear it tonight. I got Jill out. Apparently her nose is bent out of shape because she has been ignored lately and I could do nothing right. I finally figured out what was going on and we are now playing well together. Have to do the buttonholes on the cuffs and then sew the buttons on and it will be done! Hopefully Jill will cooperate with the sewing on of the buttons so I don't have to do it by hand.
I don't expect anyone here to feel sorry for me...that is not why I wrote this. I just had to explain my feelings. I really don't want to go tonight, but I will since it's paid for. Maybe we won't be there long. I really wish my best friend I've had forever was going to be there, but she is the one who lives on a sailboat in the Marshall Islands, and I think they are presently down in Fiji with it.
I hope you are all have a great day, and for those of you winding up the retreat, go out with a blast! I hope to get there in the next year or two myself. Maybe a few of us could fly into the same airport and drive there, stopping at shops along the way!! Minneapolis/St. Paul might be a good place to start. Start thinking of it....it could be a blast!



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